A Gift from the Goddess

"You were never meant to grow up in a city like this.Our kind stays together for a reason."

I could hear what Kieran was saying, but I was struggling to fully grasp it.

‘‘Not human"

‘‘Our kind’.

‘‘Werewolf’.

The words kept swimming around in my head.

An explanation that seemed too impossible to believe.

And yet, at the same time, what he was saying somehow made sense.

He was right.

I wasn’t human.

A part of me had always known that, dating back to when I was a child.I was never like the other kids at the house.

Turning eighteen had just manifested that part of me in the form of a beast.

So...was this what had been missing then? I was a werewolf? Like in those scary stories? Like...in those *monster* movies...? 

".How do I make it go away?" I asked after a few moments, my voice barely louder than a whisper.

"How do I stop being...a werewolf? To be normal?"

"Raven...it’s a part of who you are.There isn’t any way to remove it."

"But I don’t want to live with this burden of losing control at any moment," I argued.

"I can’t afford to have slips when things go wrong, or have this constantly interfering with every little thing I do.I’m living in a nightmare every time I lapse."

He took another few cautious steps towards me but I didn’t back away this time.

With every word he spoke, my resolve to push him away faded a little bit more.It was as though his presence had a soothing effect on m e and I couldn’t deny that I needed that right now.

"..It doesn’t have to be a curse," he said slowly.

"I can help you manage it.You didn’t grow up learning about the things you needed to...but I can teach you.It’s not too late."

He held out a hand to me, as if inviting me to take it.

Offering me something that no one else had ever before; A chance to live my life without fear.

...But what would it cost me?

 "I just need you to trust me, Raven," he said, making my gaze shift from his hand to his eyes Familiar.

There was familiarity when I looked at him, the same feeling I’d experienced when I first met him.

As if I'd always known him.

Whatever this reaction to him was, it was strong enough to sway every behaviour in my life.

If I believed him and accepted that this influence wasn’t due to foul intervention, then did that mean that my body had been telling me to trust him this whole time? That it was recognising in him the same condition I was born with? Was that just a normal connection between what we were? However, getting close to someone was dangerous.

Especially someone who I was meant to have investigated and then disappeared from entirely.

If my father found out about this.......But wouldn’t my father be just as upset if I continued to fail because of what I was? Medications, strict daily routines and punishments had been the only ‘solutions’ given to me up until now.

Solutions that clearly didn’t work since it continued to happen regardless.

Kieran wasn’t pretending to offer me a solution, filling my head with false promises if I kept conforming to the rules.He was offering me a way to take back control despite that very issue plaguing me.

A way to learn how to harness it instead.

"..Will I be able to stop the blackouts from happening?" I asked carefully, taking a slow step towards him.

"And the sickness? Will I stop wanting t o throw up every time it’s about to happen?"

His brow furrowed slightly at what I said.

"...Blackouts? I can’t say I’ve heard of that being a common symptom...but it’s possible you’ve been fighting against yourself too much.The more you try to stop the shift from happening, the more painful and uncontrollable the whole process is.I can walk you through it and help you so that it won’t happen."

He sounded so genuine that I wanted to believe him.

In fact, it was increasingly becoming harder to deny those feelings inside, the ones urging me to just run to him already.

But it was those very feelings that brought me here today.I still needed answers.

"And this...thing...between us.These feelings...," I vaguely said, my cheeks starting to burn a little.

I was used to faking romantic interest in people, but this was different.

It was an uncomfortable new situation for me.

at the charity

"The sparks?" he clarified.

trying to

this a normal thing between our kind? Is that how you recognise others

was his turn to shuffle a little

no, not exactly...that’s a bit of a complicated question," he fumbled as he looked around the

day we met.I needed to know if there was a way to

a way to make it stop?" I pressed when

Oh.

seemed to be the wrong question

immediately snapped back to my own, a look on his face that I was struggling

was serious...but there was something

you want it

as an ache pulsed in my chest, the question bringing with

connection to someone I

couldn’t

I’d ever felt before, a gravitation pull around him that

I was? I couldn’t be the

to mind, taking me b y

at that very thought that

bit, trying to get over it,

"Hey, you okay?"

heard him ask, but I

too much for

probably true.I’d spent the last

worn out and still

said again, though

right in front of me, his hands softly moving mine out of the way so he could lift my face up to look

repeated, feeling my

touch was so unbelievably

felt as the burning started to ease, and I shakily exhaled in

had happened today.So

been pushing myself too

Wait...

today...

today....

Oh shit.

forgotten about Noah in

I said, though failing to hide the slight

have someone waiting for me.Before I go though...I just

me didn’t want to, but I gently took a step away so I was out of

and warmth were already far

how to shut out the voices," I

d o, almost as though it’s a mental block physically

you

**BRRRRRRRRT

* **

BRRRRRRT

** ..Huh? 

**BRRRRRRRRT*

 **BRRRRRRT*¥* 

to grab it, finding the burner phone I’d brought with

of surprise, I saw the number flash across the screen and recognised it

to take this...," I said turning

on the

I tried to

"Hi, Zac."

but you didn’t call yet.It’s been

" uh..."

course Zac would

I meant to be cleaning

was

...Fuck.

postpone," I lied, conscious of the

client wasn’t home s o I said I’d come back later.I should be

"What? Rae, I thought—."

right now," I stressed, praying that he’d pick up on what I was trying to tell

incriminating, then it would make this

promise to call you

"Who—."

"Bye, Zac."

I quickly

there was a god

‘please don’t let Zac tell

phone call brought

that keeps you busy until almost one o’clock in the morning?" came

I froze at

job descriptions I

For obvious reasons.