A Gift from the Goddess

Chapter 121: Book 2 - Chapter 15 

"Raven."

Through the darkness I heard a voice, piercing through the haze.

It sounded urgent.

Someone calling out to me.

"Raven, shift back."

Every now and then I would see snippets.

Just stilled images flashing before me, showing pictures of a living room.

Of a broken table.

Of a boy.

It felt somewhat familiar but I couldn’t place it.

"Raven! —Ah, fuck."

..And pain.

So much pain.

The voice continued to call out to me, pleading with m e to do something...but I wasn’t ready.

No, instead, I rescinded into my mind further to escape.

To try and forget what was happening.

...To pretend everything was okay.

And so, I hid from it all, blocking out the images and voices.

Waiting until, finally, things didn’t hurt so badly.

..Until I was sure the pain had stopped.

".Raven," came the voice again.

Only, this time, recognition finally kicked in.

Kieran.

It was Kieran's voice and...and I’d shifted.Changing into the wolf and...—.

Oh...no, no...Instantly, my eyes flew open...and I found myself contained within his arms, wrapped up in a blanket.

He looked down at me with a face showing signs of exhaustion, his breathing heavy.

And I immediately knew something was wrong.

I wasn’t sure how long had passed but I was back to m y normal self, implying it had been at least a few minutes.

But...there was something else too.

Something I’d come to expect from these lapses.

..I could smell the sickly scent of blood.I squirmed out of his grasp, pushing away just enough to get a good look at him...and there it was.

The source of the smell.

A large gash down the front of his chest.

Blood flowing from it...increasingly becoming worse ...pooling on the ground around us.

And, suddenly, it was as if the whole world tilted.

Everywhere I looked there was blood.

Red painted on every surface, on every piece of furniture, on every wall...curtain...and lamp.

And as I frantically looked around, I felt my breathing quicken, my heart starting to race.

...Just what had I done? This was exactly what I had been afraid of and yet I’d let it happen.

I turned back to Kieran, finding his face now so pale, and I quickly moved my hands to his chest to help stop the bleeding.

Hands that were soaked even up along my forearms already.

"I’m so sorry," I whispered.

"I-I didn't mean to do this." I'd told him that this was dangerous and a bad idea.

Why hadn’t he listened to me?

 "Raven...it’s okay," he replied.

I looked at him incredulously, as if he were insane for not seeing the amount of blood he had lost.

It was a miracle he was even still able to talk.

"N-no...no it’s not okay," I stammered.

"Nothing about this is okay...You’re going to die because of me."

feel my entire body shaking, feel the tears beginning

said he knew what he was doing, that everything would be fine, and yet everything had

being helped? Was I actually a monster? "Raven, what are you talking about?

"Fine’?”

 ‘Fine’!?" I repeated, my voice becoming

time t o call an ambulance.Goddammit, Kieran! Why didn’t you

bleeding but he then grabbed my hands and held them away

are you

"Stop," he ordered.

even

not.How can you say that?

down and look," he said, cutting me

killed you...I-I didn’t

yelled this time, forcing me to

"...I said I’m fine."

as I slowly looked back down at his chest, I found

that had already stopped bleeding a while

"W-what...? I don’t understand..."

head around to look

broken pieces of

No blood in sight.

I had seen it so clearly, smelt

mistaking it....How could that

to lift me onto his lap

realise what this meant.I threw my arms around him in relief, no

was that he was

That he was safe.

"J-I’m sorry," I cried.

sorry.I fucked

up and gently stroked my hair, indulging my abrupt need

with the blanket, his warmth was helping

"You’re fine," he said.

do anything

I did,"

wasn’t strong enough.Regardless of whether it

was clear that I was still a failure.It didn’t matter if I

never overcome.Somehow, it felt like I

was my life now; useless to my father, and useless at things that should have

screw-up to

didn’t seem

away and held my face so I was forced to

your fault," he said

"I mean it."

"But I—."

instantly

a breath and

not my

but he

me this

not my fault," I finally said in

words quietly but he still seemed satisfied by my

small nod in approval, he let go of

seen anything like

I've ever witnessed.But...I don’t know.It’s giving me a weird feeling.Almost as if

mean? Are you saying there is actually

with you.But maybe more...something external affecting you," he said, his brow

It’d look something like silver." I thought

a good idea for me

"No."

drink any teas? Or regularly deal with any

I replied again, becoming increasingly more

for a moment in thought, visibly trying hard to come up with something else before, finally, he asked

could tell he was

"..What about medications?"

body

had regular medicine I took for anxiety and post- shifting side effects; mostly the pain and

By a doctor.

A professional.

a

he wouldn’t have though, right?

prompted when I still

my throat, hoping Kieran was wrong about

"Yes," I answered.

"Yes. I have medication."

show it

up and walked to where I'd left my

a bit of shuffling before I eventually could

happening so quickly, my

said,

from me,

worked, subconsciously pulling the blanket around

that this really

rarely

"These...these are suppressors,"

said in shock, slowly looking up

and used in chemical warfare.I

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