A Gift from the Goddess

Chapter Twenty-Eight I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth. My mind kept trying to justify his actions, justify how he’d treated me. Really, it was probably my fault for thinking we were closer than he felt we were. I’d realised too late that I‘d built up some sort of reliance on him without even knowing. It was such a bittersweet feeling to have had something I craved so close, only for it to be taken away having never realised it was there. And the worst part was that the entire time I’d been back, I’d been telling myself not to get close to anyone again… and yet here I was, crying over a stupid teenager of all people.

It had been self-indulgent of me to begin with given the circumstances. I didn’t know why I felt I deserved to feel validated by him. Did I think that, if we became friends, then what I did i n my past life to him would be forgiven? I still carried that burden around with me, one which still weighed heavily on my shoulders. It was something I’d completely buried within myself, had forced myself to forget, only for it to be dredged back up again once I’d found out who Cai really was. I stayed in the classroom for at least another half an hour. It was silly but, even though I knew Cai would have well and truly left already, I couldn’t make myself move for fear I’d see him whilst trying to get home.

When I did eventually manage to pick myself up to leave, I could feel my muscles were sore and ached all over. I hadn’t noticed it before, but my body had been shaking the entire time I’d stayed slumped on the cold ground. It had been too much stress, too much emotion to handle all at once, and my tiny young body had struggled to compensate.

I now wanted nothing more than to be left alone and to be allowed to think over everything that had just happened, everything I’d just done. And so, I arrived back at my house and entered silently, being greeted by an attendant at the front door as I walked past.

“Welcome home, Saintess,” she said, bowing slightly. Ordinarily, I probably would have just ignored it but having the fresh reminder irritated me after everything I’d just been through.

“I‘m not a Saintess yet,” I snapped, narrowing my eyes at her.

“You’re right,” said a voice behind me. “You‘re not. And do you know why?”

I turned around and saw my mother leaning against the doorway to the living room with a stern look on her face. Her arms were folded as she looked down at me.

“Because you still haven’t fulfilled the Elders’ summons for you to have your confirmation completed,” she continued, not waiting for me to reply. “They sent yet another letter today…

-wait, have you been crying?” “No,” I answered flatly, hinting at her to drop it. “And I don’t want the confirmation. Just the mere possibility of having the mark is already terrifying enough to most of the pack, why would I want to make that worse?”

She sighed. “As much as I’d like to agree that you’re safer without the official formalities, you can’t just ignore them and expect that they‘ll stop asking you.” 

and tried to

“Aria.”

was one of warning that I’d gone too far, stopping me in my tracks. I wanted to scream at her that I didn’t want

“Do you have one of their letters I can

“It doesn’t specify how many Elders are actually

just one would be sufficient…,”

then. Set a date. But I have one condition.” I handed her the envelope back and started walking to my room again. “I‘ll only go if it‘s conducted by Elder Luke, and only Elder Luke.” “Aria, wait. Do you want to talk about what’s going on? I can clearly see you’re upset,” she

day. I need

myself in my room after that and

those I’d hurt before. The ordeal with him at school must have been prevalent enough inside my mind for my inner guilty conscience to drag up the unpleasant memories. I eventually awoke in the morning feeling more exhausted than when I had gone to sleep. It was a Saturday and so I, unfortunately, wouldn‘t be able to stay in bed for long; I would be expected to show up for Luna studies. The classes usually covered topics such as etiquette, event organisation, names of important figures and more. I had been trying to play along the last few months, pretending I didn’t know the material she was teaching,

having been born the youngest in a family of five,

couldn’t

that brings us to the next family,” she said. “There is the Lycroft family with their

“David.”

interjected so we both said the name

caution but continued anyway. “…And his three

“Jeremy, Thomas and Peter.”

that I’d interrupted with the answers. I