A Gift from the Goddess

Chapter 54

Chapter Fifty–Four 

“Kiss me,” I said. 

“...What...?” 

After leaving home, I‘d headed straight to where I knew they would be. Somewhere I knew that I definitely shouldn‘t be. 

But there was no hesitation as I‘d confidently walked up and knocked on their door. And when Cai had answered, I‘d ignored his confusion and demanded the one thing I knew could make me feel better. 

Because if it felt anywhere near as good as the first time, then maybe it would be enough to make me forget for a moment that everything was falling to pieces around me. 

“Kiss me,” I repeated. 

His eyes were wide, stunned at my request, but he wasn‘t moving. I could see he was still in the same attire he‘d been in earlier; the formal clothes making his body somehow look even more fitted. 

I quietly sighed impatiently whilst his head tried to comprehend exactly what was happening. 

“Aria–.” 

However, I didn‘t wait for him to finish his sentence. It wasn‘t words I wanted right now... it was him. 

I walked up and pulled on the collar of his shirt until his face was within reach of my own. 

“Please, Cai...,” I whispered, as I looked up slowly from his lips to his eyes. 

He was so close now that it caused a shiver of anticipation to run through my body. I needed this, I needed him, and I could see in his eyes that he wanted me too. The tension between us was becoming so intense that it felt tangible. 1 

The cold night breeze swept around us and it only made the warmth coming from him even more inviting. I loosened the hand I had hooked onto his shirt and ran it all the way along his chest, feeling him under m y touch, until it rested on his broad shoulder. I wanted him closer, his body still feeling too far away. 

My heart jumped a little when I saw him finally lean in closer and place his hand on the side of my head, his thumb resting against my cheek tenderly. And instinctively, I closed my eyes as I moved towards him, preparing myself for what would happen next. 

But instead of feeling him against my lips, I felt him shift away... and kiss my cheek instead. 

“No,” he said quietly. “Not like this.” 

I snapped my eyes open to look at him. 

“No… no, please, I need this,” I said and grabbed onto him tighter. “Please, Cai... I want you.” 

He closed his eyes and looked pained, almost as if he was internally having a battle within himself. 

“Aria–” 

“No, you said you wanted me,” I said, my voice becoming more frantic. “Why are you doing this now?” 

“Because I honestly don‘t know if it‘s me you want right now, or if it‘s just you finding an outlet for your grief.” 

I could feel as my cheeks began to burn in humiliation, my eyes tearing up, and instantly I dropped my 

side as if he‘d just stung me. His words left me embarrassed and hurt over his rejection, and... angry. Angry that everyone was choosing to disappoint me today of all days. 

Chaptei Hity Out 

of hearing people saying that to

even stand to look at me today and yet somehow you‘re now on

do you even care? This is what you wanted, right? You just wanted to sleep with me?” I

creating a small distance between us. I couldn‘t help but flinch at

hell this is right now. And I honestly think that maybe, deep down, you do actually want me too... but the way you‘re acting right now just tells me that you‘re in too

gritted my teeth. “There‘s nothing wrong with me...,” I

you can‘t even see it is

calming himself down.

for you, even if that’s just as a friend. But I have more self–respect than to sit back and let you use me because of the feelings I have for you. Because I do want you... and I honestly want nothing more than for you to tell me right now that I‘m wrong about all of this. But from what I can see, you need help, Aria, and I‘m happy to oblige... but not like that. Not if it‘s just temporary to help you deal with

was silent. I wanted to speak, to tell him

me you actually want. Or tell me that you want my help, and

think... but ultimately shook my head. This wasn‘t the sort of on the spot decision I had expected to deal with when coming here. I wasn‘t

he said

now. I… I need to go.”

I could feel he was about to chase after me, but I

where are you

off into the night away from him. There was no point in staying any longer. I was already at the point of feeling humiliated and

you‘re going home?”

knowing

help it anymore, unable to hold it in. I screamed out into the sky; my frustration

to take my side. I‘d needed my father to push for Thea‘s arrest, or at least confinement until it was safe to find

thoughts out of my

this was all Thea‘s fault. Everything had been fine before she‘d shown up. Myra would still be alive and I wouldn‘t be fighting with Aleric and my father. I wouldn‘t have to feel so messed up

beginning to crumble around me, signs of the

weren‘t willing to do what needed to be done, then maybe would

Fuck it. 

again, walking with purpose towards the one place I could get my hands on somethingt o inflict as much

Thea pay... and I would do it slowly, piece by piece, with the silver blade she used to kill Myra. I would make it agonising for her

on me. It wasn‘t happy with

and I began to crawl even as the pain got worse; I was determined to keep going no matter the cost. It was as if a car was thrown on top of my body, crushing me slowly

was too late

to tell myself; that I was marked by the Goddess, chosen, a Saintess, and no order should be able to contain me. If I wanted to go

until they finally broke off me like chains... and, instantly, I gasped

...I was free. 

wasting any time, I picked myself back up and continued on my journey, my new freedom only coercing me onwards faster. I kept going until, finally, I came to the building where the evidence was kept locked up. The silver knife would be in there I knew, guarded by at least one warrior, but I wasn‘t concerned. Given how little time had passed since Aleric‘s decision, I was fairly sure that, as far they probably knew, I was still a part of the

entering the building, I looked around. I‘d been here many times before during my Beta heir rounds but it felt like I was seeing it in a completely new light given how dark it already was

ahead. A room guarded by only one warrior named Ray. Unfortunately, I didn‘t

in a flat voice, approaching him slowly to gauge

he saw me enter. “Beta heir? Why are you here so late?”

something up. It‘s for the

to help with solving the issue of Myra‘s

Chesterbrity Fou! 

hesitated, looking uncomfortable, and probably realised that something

in the morning, Ma‘am. The evidence locker is kept shut until daylight hours. The warriors are Alpha

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