Accidental Surrogate

I groan when I wake up, but I don’t open my eyes. Not yet. I feel like I just closed them ten minutes ago anyway – my poor eyeballs need more rest.

Instead, I take a moment to feel my body from the inside out, to check in with myself and see what hurts, what feels good. I’m surprised to find that I can feel remnants of my mother’s gift running through me – what feels like little sparkling tendrils of sunlight, working through my limbs, perhaps healing me. I smile to think of it, smile to think of my mother giving me something that lasts after so many years of her absence.

She is a mother goddess, after all the mother to us all, not just me. But still, as my actual mother, it feels nice to finally have…a piece of her.

I hear my little baby give a little cry and my eyes fly open, searching for him. I sit up in bed, a hand going to my head, and look blearily around..My eyes are drawn instantly – unsurprisingly – to the huge werewolf standing across the room, bouncing a little bundle of blankets in his arm. I smile at my mate’s turned back and quickly climb out of bed, moving towards him.

Sinclair hears me coming and quietly turns, our little boy still fussing a little in his arms.

“Has he been like this long?” I ask, yawning, reaching for my child. Sinclair transfers him into my arms and I feel a quick rushing thrill at the feel of my baby returned to me.

“No,” Sinclair replies with a smile. “He’s been sleeping well – he just started crying now. Do you think he’s hungry?”

I shrug and look up at him. “Probably. I know I am.”

Together we carry Rafe back to the bed and I climb in, rearranging my top so that Rafe can try to eat. Sinclair quietly watches as I work and I let out a little sigh of relief when Rafe quickly latches and begins to suck. I watch him for a moment, instinctually doing a little check on our bond and receiving a little push of happiness and satisfaction back from him.

Suddenly, I begin to wonder something.

you still have a bond with him?” I ask Sinclair, my eyes going

easily, his eyes still on

one with your father?” I press further, curious. This

Sinclair responds. “But no – as you grow, the bond between parents and their children fades a bit. Once a child is able to speak and

Sinclair clicks his tongue and reaches out

to lose my bond with my child,” I say, my voice trembling. “I can’t

be tied, just in different ways. Besides, when he grows up and meets

then down at my little baby. “No

when he’s a big hulking teenage wolf stinking up

raise him to be a nice clean nerd, so no one likes him, and I get to keep him. No one will be good enough for him anyway.” “All right,” Sinclair murmurs, shifting his position on the bed and coming to lay next to me, closing his eyes. “Whatever you say, trouble.” I smile at him, watching him drift off to sleep as the sunlight starts to brighten

–

though, a little knock comes at the door, waking me. I hesitate and stand, not knowing what to expect,

cheerful, stopping in the middle of the room and

and glancing at Sinclair asleep in the bed. “How are you, Ella?” he asks, curious. He comes

doing well, I think.” I reply, heaving a big yawn. “He’s been surprisingly peaceful. Is

ambulance is outside waiting – are you

eager, suddenly feeling more awake. After a quick discussion, I agree to meet Hank at the palace entrance in a few minutes, after I wake Sinclair. He nods