Accidental Surrogate

Cora

“It’s all right,” Roger says, his eyes going wide as he takes in my pale face, my scared expression and realizes that he’s freaked me out for the third or fourth time today. “It’s not – it’s not bad, I was just kind of a dick – it was a misunderstanding –”

“What?” I ask, more confused now than ever.

–

“Listen,” he says, leaning in towards me. “Just let me tell you, all right? II was going to tell you at some point, definitely not like this but…” he sighs, looking into my face and then down at my stomach, and then back up into my eyes. “I think that… if we’re going to start on this new part

–

–

of our lives – this parent thing – well,” he says, giving me a charming little half–smile and a

shrug. “We should be on the same page, right?”

I nod, agreeing, but looking at him a little askance. “Did you not think that we should…go into our mating? On the same page?”

He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “It’s a little different, Cora – because it didn’t matter – I didn’t think we could have kids

་་

I frown at him – not mad or angry, but confused…

“Listen, let me just tell it,” he says, leaning forward and looking at me with pleading eyes.

“Okay,” I say, quite simply, taking his hands and leaning even closer to press a kiss to his mouthr letting him know that I’m listening with an open heart.

“Okay,” Roger says again, taking a deep breath before he begins. “Do you remember… when you and Ella went into the desert with her mother, Regina?”

“Reina,” I correct softly, and he laughs.

“Right,” he says, shaking his head. “Those names are so easy to mix up. Anyway – you three were out on your girls trip, and my choice was either to hang out with those priests in the temple, or go back on to the ship all alone.”

Ismirk at him, knowing precisely which one he chose. He sees my smile and laughs a little.

“Yeah,” he says, grinning at me. “I chose solitude. Or at least…I thought I did.”

on the ship?”

pissed off at being left behind. Sinclair sent me to protect Ella, and there’s frankly nowhere I wanted to be except

when I hear this, but I don’t interrupt.

at the moon, it started to grow…brighter and brighter. And at first I thought that I was just crazy or drunk I mean, the captain gave me a little of his whiskey when he saw how

focus, and he looks

a little, looking down at our joined hands, “she was there.”

I ask, a little breathless, but some

startled by the experience. “Your mother, Cora. Except…at the time, I didn’t

– Roger met her, and me, but

I know that she’s my mother too? And that she only spoke to Ella in the temple, and then went to Roger

disappointed. Why does she want to

why I didn’t want

past my jealousy and truly

the temple. Instead, it was just…a vision of sorts, more like the baptism but…not quite.” He shakes his head a

That he can tell me. So Roger turns back to me and looks at me directly, not holding anything

I was chasing the wrong destiny. That my future was not in war and politics, as my brother’s was – and you have to realize, that that was devastating to hear at

concentrating on nothing else

a little, concentrating. “It’s hard to know how to phrase it – because it wasn’t precisely words – but that for the future of the world, I had

dad, and raising my kids well to be

with surprise. And then I lean forward, finally getting it. “Oh, so

we could have kids, Cora…” he whispers, clutching my hands tightly. “And it fucking broke

при

7

to me I didn’t even care about kids –

–

always Dominic who was dying to be a dad, not

again, my

all up, Cora – I’m thrilled that you’re pregnant, and not just because the goddess told me to be. I

tells me, pausing to ensure that I hear him, “and I can’t

–

likewise unsure if I wanted kids. But the moment I really understood that this

else I wanted in

“because you thought…my mom told you to.”

–

want to, but when a goddess tells you to do something you feel compelled to do it – and I thought she was telling me to run from you, when she probably was telling me to run to you to