Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 54

The Howell’s
It was almost noon when I wake up. At first I thought that everything was as it was supposed to

be, but then everything comes crashing down on me. It wasn’t a bad dream like I had thought.

Ethan had really betrayed me.

I feel my tears well up. I cried myself to sleep yesterday and I was just so damn tired of crying. I

went to bed wishing that it would all change when I woke up. Praying for a miracle, but here I am.

Nothing’s changed. What I wanted to be nothing but a nightmare, was now my reality.

I slowly get out of bed. I had no energy to do anything, but I also knew I couldn’t sleep and wallow

in bed all day.

I take a long shower hoping it will make things better. It doesn’t. I don’t think anything can make

everything that happened better.

After dressing in a t–shirt and some yoga pants, I go to the kitchen for something to eat. I was just

taking out some eggs when my doorbell rang. I heave a sigh of defeat. I wasn’t in the mood to see

anyone. I just wanted to be left alone.

“Hi” Letty says with a small smile when I open the door.

She looks as tired and worn as I am. Hers is probably more physical unlike mine which is both

physical and psychological.

“Hi Letty” I stand awkwardly at the door.

I didn’t want to be rude but I also didn’t want anyone near me or around me. Like I said, I wanted to

be left alone to come to terms with all that I learned yesterday.

“I know you probably don’t to see anyone right now, but can I please come in?” she pleads.

It still surprises me how well we’ve come to know each other. It’s like we’ve known each other for

years, instead of months.

I let out a breath. “Yeah sure”

It as she walks in that I notice she has a couple of boxes with her.

“Food” she says and I nod.

feel like cooking even though I

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down on the big sofa, Letty joins me

boxes of food.

don’t talk as we eat. Both of

you? I’m worried about you Ava. This can’t be easy for

eating.

lying to her that I was okay. Just to get her off my back. Besides,

to pretend most of the

it away. I needed

drowning.

hard time accepting that Ethan isn’t the man

people I thought were

harder to

me. If life would have been great had I been

Rowan, but then I

would be different had I not

all over again if

miss him. Now more than ever I wish Noah

anchor.

begin to imagine all you must be feeling. I don’t even know where to begin

Letty says, pulling

She really wasn’t good at comforting

was

feel.

a hard time. Not to mention that it hurts.

finally gotten a guy that would love me and then

anything, it gets ripped away from me” I blink

for a man

don’t know who is worse. Rowan for using me for sex while

and still using me for sex while he

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out as rude but I’m gonna hit you with the truth. If

you were thinking the whole time, then I would have

are you

She sighs again. “How do I put this out without

whole expectation on someone else. You can’t

hole Rowan and you

don’t get to say anything before she

build this fantasy and I never saw it until now. You think when you find the man that will love you then everything will fall into place. The only person who can fill that hole in your heart is you You alone can love yourself the way you want to be loved. You have to love yourself first and judging from the way I see things, you have never loved yourself” She

back of the couch

I glare at her

“Am 17”

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