Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 54

The Howell’s
It was almost noon when I wake up. At first I thought that everything was as it was supposed to

be, but then everything comes crashing down on me. It wasn’t a bad dream like I had thought.

Ethan had really betrayed me.

I feel my tears well up. I cried myself to sleep yesterday and I was just so damn tired of crying. I

went to bed wishing that it would all change when I woke up. Praying for a miracle, but here I am.

Nothing’s changed. What I wanted to be nothing but a nightmare, was now my reality.

I slowly get out of bed. I had no energy to do anything, but I also knew I couldn’t sleep and wallow

in bed all day.

I take a long shower hoping it will make things better. It doesn’t. I don’t think anything can make

everything that happened better.

After dressing in a t–shirt and some yoga pants, I go to the kitchen for something to eat. I was just

taking out some eggs when my doorbell rang. I heave a sigh of defeat. I wasn’t in the mood to see

anyone. I just wanted to be left alone.

“Hi” Letty says with a small smile when I open the door.

She looks as tired and worn as I am. Hers is probably more physical unlike mine which is both

physical and psychological.

“Hi Letty” I stand awkwardly at the door.

I didn’t want to be rude but I also didn’t want anyone near me or around me. Like I said, I wanted to

be left alone to come to terms with all that I learned yesterday.

“I know you probably don’t to see anyone right now, but can I please come in?” she pleads.

It still surprises me how well we’ve come to know each other. It’s like we’ve known each other for

years, instead of months.

I let out a breath. “Yeah sure”

It as she walks in that I notice she has a couple of boxes with her.

“Food” she says and I nod.

I really didn’t feel

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room instead. Seating down on the big sofa,

boxes of food.

in. We don’t talk as we eat. Both of us seemingly

This can’t be easy for you”

eating.

I think about lying to her that I was okay. Just to

easier to pretend most of the time

I push it away. I needed to talk because I felt

drowning.

I begin. “I’m still having a hard time

the people I thought were my family aren’t really blood

the two was harder to accept. I keep asking myself if things

have been

would have saved me from ever meeting Rowan, but

be different had I not met

everything all over again if it meant having my son in

ever I wish Noah was here with me. He has always been

anchor.

you must be feeling. I don’t even know

pulling me back from my

at her and smile a little. She really

realness was better

feel.

just having a hard time. Not to mention

that I’d finally gotten a guy

into anything, it gets ripped away from me” I blink away the tears, not wanting

Especially for a man that

worse. Rowan for using me for sex while he thought

playing me and still using me for sex

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rude but I’m gonna hit you with the

was what you were thinking the whole time, then

you talking

love you” She sighs again. “How do I put this out without hurting you further you went into a

on someone else. You can’t think that a man loving

and you

get to say anything

You think when you find the man that will love you then everything will fall into place. The only person who can fill that hole in your heart is you You alone can love yourself the way you want to be loved. You have to love yourself first and judging from the way

back of the couch

I glare at her

“Am 17”

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