Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 54

The Howell’s
It was almost noon when I wake up. At first I thought that everything was as it was supposed to

be, but then everything comes crashing down on me. It wasn’t a bad dream like I had thought.

Ethan had really betrayed me.

I feel my tears well up. I cried myself to sleep yesterday and I was just so damn tired of crying. I

went to bed wishing that it would all change when I woke up. Praying for a miracle, but here I am.

Nothing’s changed. What I wanted to be nothing but a nightmare, was now my reality.

I slowly get out of bed. I had no energy to do anything, but I also knew I couldn’t sleep and wallow

in bed all day.

I take a long shower hoping it will make things better. It doesn’t. I don’t think anything can make

everything that happened better.

After dressing in a t–shirt and some yoga pants, I go to the kitchen for something to eat. I was just

taking out some eggs when my doorbell rang. I heave a sigh of defeat. I wasn’t in the mood to see

anyone. I just wanted to be left alone.

“Hi” Letty says with a small smile when I open the door.

She looks as tired and worn as I am. Hers is probably more physical unlike mine which is both

physical and psychological.

“Hi Letty” I stand awkwardly at the door.

I didn’t want to be rude but I also didn’t want anyone near me or around me. Like I said, I wanted to

be left alone to come to terms with all that I learned yesterday.

“I know you probably don’t to see anyone right now, but can I please come in?” she pleads.

It still surprises me how well we’ve come to know each other. It’s like we’ve known each other for

years, instead of months.

I let out a breath. “Yeah sure”

It as she walks in that I notice she has a couple of boxes with her.

“Food” she says and I nod.

am grateful. I really didn’t feel like cooking even though I

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living room instead. Seating down on the big

boxes of food.

don’t talk as we eat.

you Ava. This can’t be easy for you” she says after we are

eating.

about lying to her that I was okay. Just to get

of the time than to face

soon as that thought crosses my mind, I push it away.

drowning.

time accepting that Ethan isn’t the

people I thought were my family aren’t really blood

harder to

life would have been great had I

me from ever meeting Rowan, but

different had I not met Rowan, I turn back from

I would do everything all over again if

I miss him. Now more than ever I wish Noah was here with me. He has always been

anchor.

even begin to imagine all you must be feeling. I

Letty says, pulling me back from

She really wasn’t good at comforting someone or

realness was

feel.

Letty. I’m just having a hard time. Not to mention that it hurts. I was finally

I’d finally gotten a guy that would love me and then before

from me” I blink away the tears, not

a man that

for using me for sex while he

playing me and still using me for sex

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want to come out as rude but I’m

the whole time, then I would have

you

you” She sighs again. “How do I put this out without hurting you

build you whole expectation on someone else. You can’t think that a

hole Rowan and you family

say anything

hole in your heart is you You alone can love yourself the way you want to be loved. You have to love yourself first and judging from the way I see things, you have never loved yourself” She slumps against

back of the couch

her

“Am 17”

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