Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 54

The Howell’s
It was almost noon when I wake up. At first I thought that everything was as it was supposed to

be, but then everything comes crashing down on me. It wasn’t a bad dream like I had thought.

Ethan had really betrayed me.

I feel my tears well up. I cried myself to sleep yesterday and I was just so damn tired of crying. I

went to bed wishing that it would all change when I woke up. Praying for a miracle, but here I am.

Nothing’s changed. What I wanted to be nothing but a nightmare, was now my reality.

I slowly get out of bed. I had no energy to do anything, but I also knew I couldn’t sleep and wallow

in bed all day.

I take a long shower hoping it will make things better. It doesn’t. I don’t think anything can make

everything that happened better.

After dressing in a t–shirt and some yoga pants, I go to the kitchen for something to eat. I was just

taking out some eggs when my doorbell rang. I heave a sigh of defeat. I wasn’t in the mood to see

anyone. I just wanted to be left alone.

“Hi” Letty says with a small smile when I open the door.

She looks as tired and worn as I am. Hers is probably more physical unlike mine which is both

physical and psychological.

“Hi Letty” I stand awkwardly at the door.

I didn’t want to be rude but I also didn’t want anyone near me or around me. Like I said, I wanted to

be left alone to come to terms with all that I learned yesterday.

“I know you probably don’t to see anyone right now, but can I please come in?” she pleads.

It still surprises me how well we’ve come to know each other. It’s like we’ve known each other for

years, instead of months.

I let out a breath. “Yeah sure”

It as she walks in that I notice she has a couple of boxes with her.

“Food” she says and I nod.

I really didn’t feel like cooking even

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to the living room instead. Seating down on the big

boxes of food.

we eat. Both of us seemingly lost in our own

you? I’m worried about you Ava. This can’t be easy for

eating.

moment I think about lying to her that I was

to pretend most of the time than

that thought crosses my mind, I push it away. I needed to talk

drowning.

I begin. “I’m still having a hard time

people I thought were my family

to accept.

have been great had I been raised by my real

saved me from ever meeting Rowan, but then

be different had I not met Rowan, I turn back

do everything all over again

miss him. Now more than ever I wish Noah was here with

anchor.

must be feeling. I don’t

says, pulling me back

little. She really wasn’t good at

though. Her realness was better than someone pretending

feel.

having a hard time. Not to mention that it

on, you know? I thought that I’d finally gotten a

blossom into anything, it gets ripped away from me” I blink away the

a man that played and toyed

using me for sex while he thought about

using me

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as rude but I’m gonna

thinking the whole time, then I would have put a stop

are you talking

love you” She sighs again. “How do I put this out without hurting you further you went into a relationship

on someone else. You can’t think that a

hole Rowan and you family

get to say anything before

that hole in your heart is you You alone can love yourself the way you want to be loved. You have to love yourself first and judging from the way I see things, you have never loved yourself”

back of the couch

her feeling a bit attacked

“Am 17”

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