Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 54

The Howell’s
It was almost noon when I wake up. At first I thought that everything was as it was supposed to

be, but then everything comes crashing down on me. It wasn’t a bad dream like I had thought.

Ethan had really betrayed me.

I feel my tears well up. I cried myself to sleep yesterday and I was just so damn tired of crying. I

went to bed wishing that it would all change when I woke up. Praying for a miracle, but here I am.

Nothing’s changed. What I wanted to be nothing but a nightmare, was now my reality.

I slowly get out of bed. I had no energy to do anything, but I also knew I couldn’t sleep and wallow

in bed all day.

I take a long shower hoping it will make things better. It doesn’t. I don’t think anything can make

everything that happened better.

After dressing in a t–shirt and some yoga pants, I go to the kitchen for something to eat. I was just

taking out some eggs when my doorbell rang. I heave a sigh of defeat. I wasn’t in the mood to see

anyone. I just wanted to be left alone.

“Hi” Letty says with a small smile when I open the door.

She looks as tired and worn as I am. Hers is probably more physical unlike mine which is both

physical and psychological.

“Hi Letty” I stand awkwardly at the door.

I didn’t want to be rude but I also didn’t want anyone near me or around me. Like I said, I wanted to

be left alone to come to terms with all that I learned yesterday.

“I know you probably don’t to see anyone right now, but can I please come in?” she pleads.

It still surprises me how well we’ve come to know each other. It’s like we’ve known each other for

years, instead of months.

I let out a breath. “Yeah sure”

It as she walks in that I notice she has a couple of boxes with her.

“Food” she says and I nod.

really didn’t feel like cooking even though I

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down on the big sofa, Letty

boxes of food.

talk as we eat.

This can’t be

eating.

I think about lying to her that I was okay. Just to get her off

of the time than to face

crosses my mind, I push it away. I needed to talk because I felt

drowning.

isn’t” I begin. “I’m still having a hard time accepting

that the people I thought were my

two was harder to accept. I keep asking myself

better for me. If life would have been great had I been

Rowan, but then I would never have had

I think of how things would be different had I not met

all over again if it meant

him. Now more than ever I wish Noah was here with

anchor.

begin to imagine all you must be feeling. I don’t

pulling

look at her and smile a little. She really wasn’t good at comforting someone or making

was better than someone pretending to

feel.

Not to mention that

on, you know? I thought that I’d finally gotten a guy that would love me and then

blossom into anything, it gets ripped away from me” I blink away the tears, not

anymore. Especially for a man that

is worse. Rowan for using me for sex while

still using me

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but I’m gonna hit you with the truth.

was what you were thinking the whole time, then I

you

keep looking for men to love you” She sighs again. “How do I put this out without hurting you further you went into a relationship with

build you whole expectation on someone else. You can’t think that a man loving

hole Rowan and you family

to say anything

when you find the man that will love you then everything will fall into place. The only person who can fill that hole in your heart is you You alone can love yourself the way you want to be loved.

back of the couch

glare at her feeling a bit attacked

“Am 17”

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