There’s just something…
Calvin had called immediately he got the missed call notification. He’d explained that the reason he didn’t pick up is because he was in a meeting and his phone had been silent.

He wanted to come home right away, but told him that everything was now fine. That I had taken

care of the situation and that Gunner was fine. He wasn’t crying anymore. Neither was he sad.

That was enough for me.

He was reluctant, but he finally agreed given that his meeting would run late.

Now here I was cooking dinner for us. With thousands of thoughts running through my head. It’s like I can’t get a break from my own thoughts. They’re constantly there and now there some that are added concerning Gunner.

“What are we having for dinner mom?” Noah asks sitting down at the counter.

“Yes, what? I am starving” Gunner adds smiling at me.

There it was again. That damn smile. It’s not that I hated it. I could never hate any smile Gunner gives me. It’s just that it fucking bothers me so much. There was something about it that I just couldn’t place my finger on.

“I’m not sure” I tell them. “Why don’t we see

what my craving will pick?”

Noah smiles wide and turns to Gunner. “Mom has insan

cravings. Sometimes they’re really great

and other times it’s totally disgusting”

Gunner nods his head. “Can I help?”

“Sure. Why don’t you flow the chicken?” I tell him.

Noah wasn’t really that helpful in the kitchen. In fact he was a complete disaster. That’s why he normally never helps unless it’s something he can actually do. Something he won’t mess up.

I got out the marinating sliced chicken breasts and the Ziploc bag of seasoned flour and handed them over to Gunner.

He took them willingly with a smile on his face. One thing I learned about him was that he loved food and he also loved cooking. He was going to make a very lucky woman happy one day if he continued like this.

“As for you, Noah, you can help with the dessert” I turn to him

+15 BONUS

“At least that’s easy and I won’t mess it up” he says grinning, making both me and Gunner laugh

He was self–aware. I liked that about him.

“Now, if you get the buttermilk marinade on your fingers, don’t get it near your eyes. It’ll burn,

because of the Tabasco and salt that is in it I warn Gunner.

“Okay”

We get to work. Chatting and simply having fun. I was so glad that I could give this to Gunner. So happy that I was able to give him happiness. I couldn’t take away all his pain and sadness, but

this had to be enough for now.

He was a lovely boy. Shy at first, but when you got to know him, you realize how amazing he is. I

just couldn’t understand why his mother would do this to him.

From what little I gathered. She doesn’t want to be in his life. I don’t know if it’s by choice or

maybe forced circumstances, all I know is that it was hurting Gunner. The last thing I want is for

to grow up with issues just like

I’ve always wished and prayed for” his low voice

“What?” Noah asks him.

takes deep breath before answering. “This. Having a

cooking alongside her. That kind of thing. Don’t get me wrong,

never be my

into pieces for this little boy. If I could, I would give

Some things just aren’t possible. Like how Noah wants

to get back

honey?” I

and dad. That is enough. I know you’re not my

a mom to

give him a hug before

“Damn!” Noah groans.

2/5

+15 BOMUS

I chastise him and he goes

pushing and pushing for you and dad to

for him and he immediately steps into them. I close

kissing his forehead too.

him

keep praying and hoping, but I’ll stop pushing

“Thank you” I say

and eventually finish cooking. They both help me set

down to eat.

the three of us, or should I say four, we almost clean everything, but I put my foot down for some left overs. Calvin was probably going to come home tired and hungry.

cook something.

then it is

house. There was still an extra room even after turning one of them into a nursery. The last remaining bedroom could

Gunner’s room.

his safe space while he was here. I quickly get

what I would need.

have to ask

when

know what he likes.

I was sure he’d agree. Well I hoped he would. Plus

of the room. He knows Gunner better

just finishing up the list of essentials when the doorbell rang. I wiggle

sure that it will Calvin on the door. I

“Hi” I tell him.

you too” he says, giving me a

aside and he comes in. We move to the

3/5

*15 BONUS

quiet Are they asleep?” he

“Yes”

know what to say. I had so many question,

today? Gunner was crying because

say those words, his face turns stone

of woman abandons her son? I get and understand that she doesn’t love me and she never will, it hurts, but I learned to accept that. Turning her back on

I’ve suffered through it since I first fell for Rowan. I didn’t want my friend to go through it, but it looks like he

she refuses to come see Gunner kills me. He

he started to understand things. He started to understand that his mother doesn’t want him and she wants nothing to

radiating from his

thing he wants is totally out of my reach. I regret ever falling in love with her. Regret ever

and that is one thing I

I heard those words from? Yeah from my own lips. Didn’t

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