Ex-Husband's Regret

Her side of the story
Mom collapses in the chair after my admission. The heartbroken look in her eyes was undoing

me. The disappointed look she gave me nearly made me crumble on the spot.
Travis, who had been holding me, lets go as if I had burned him. He backs away from me slowly

until he’s a few feet away.

I know the rest had varying degrees of shock, but they didn’t matter to me right now. Not when

my family was looking at me like they didn’t know me. Like I was a stranger.

“Please tell me you’re playing a sick joke on me,” Mom pleads. “Tell me you didn’t have a child and

kept him hidden from us all these years.”

I want to lie to them just so the heartbroken and disappointed look in their eyes will disappear. I

know that I can no longer do that. There was no hiding from this. There was no more running from

the truth.

“I’m sorry. So sorry,” I cry as I stumble towards her. “I wanted to tell you, but I was so ashamed.”

I go to take her hand, but she flinches and pulls it away.

This is what I’ve been so afraid of. Ava was right. I was the perfect daughter. The one who never

made any mistakes.

The one that thought things through before, except for that one time. Now their image of me is

tarnished. Now they know that I am just like them. Human. The Ace card I had over Ava was gone. 2

I was in the same boat as Ava. I made mistakes that are now hunting me. Sleeping with Calvin

remains the greatest mistak

y life.

“H–How did this happen? When did it happen…did dad now?” Travis asks as he paces, frustration

clear in his steps.

“Dad didn’t know. No one except Calvin and Molly knew.” I look at the ground, unable to face the

look on my mom’s face.

“Start from the beginning and don’t leave a single thing out. I want to know why the hell you’ve

kept my grandson a secret from his family,” Mom growls, her eyes turning fierce.

I didn’t want to rehash the past, but at this point, I don’t think I had any choice. If I didn’t want

them to be even madder than they were right now, then I had to spill it.

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+15 BONUS

“When Rowan married Ava, I was broken I tried not to let it show. Tried to make you, dad, and

Travis believe I was okay because you were all so worried about me. I felt like I was drowning,

left with nothing. When

tell any of you, but I fell

the grass, feeling as small as I did back then when I learned that

with Ava.

away. I didn’t eat, I didn’t sleep, and I didn’t attend classes. In fact, I

when I refused to get better,

let you know. I didn’t want you to know how I was

out how tough things were

in memory. I had so much bitterness and resentment towards Ava

would have been ecstatic.

later that I discovered she had been going through her own kind of

that. Molly became my anchor. My grades were improving,

constantly cry or think about Rowan every second.” I take a deep breath “It was

I met Calvin again. It turns out we went to the same Uni and he was also

assignment partner.” 2

really talk to him. After all, we weren’t friends. I

the obsession he had for me

being weary of him. We co–existed. He stayed out of my way and I stayed out of

to stop, but now more than ever, I knew they

for some time. They

me know that Ava had given birth to a baby boy

at first sight. Everything around me

the surface.” I try to breathe through the

so fucking hard.

pain, and I was really angry. Angry at myself for turning down Rowan’s

drunk and sleeping with Ava, angry at

angry at the baby

of air. I don’t need to turn to know that it is from Rowan. I still

gone the way I wanted it

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to Rowan, and that would have hurt him. That’s why I slept with Calvin that night, because I counted on Rowan’s friend telling him. He would have been so hurt, I would have gotten my revenge, and maybe then it would no longer hurt as

saving it for Rowan and in the end I gave it to the

I told Calvin that it was a mistake and that he should forget about what happened between

for what was to come

back to ignoring each other like the other didn’t exist, that is, until my period was late. A cheap test. and later, a doctor’s appointment

news I’ve ever received. Deep in my heart, I believed that one day Rowan and I would get back together.

my mistake to always be in

didn’t you get an emergency pill the morning after?” mom asks, making

new to me. To put it plainly, I was naive.

time I’ve ever h–had s–sex so I didn’t really know that I should have.

enough to get me pregnant. Looking back, maybe if I’d

have aused me to get one, but like I

anyone to know.”

that during all the years you dated Rowan, you never slept

a virgin?” Travis

knew Rowan wasn’t. Before we started dating, which was at seventeen, he’d

a vagina. When I’d told him I

ready. My biggest regret was holding out

3/5

“Can we not

+15 BONUS

a virgin. Anyway,”

I didn’t want the child and I wanted to get rid of it,

wanted an abortion?” Mom asks, her voice ringing with

but nod my head. “Calvin threatened to tell you and