Hoping against hope
I stare at my son. I’m so proud of him and of the bond he has with his mother. No one, not even her best

friends and her parents, knew the name she had chosen, yet she had told Noah.

“That’s really good,” Mary says, smiling at Noah. “You’re already shaping up to be a great big brother.”

Noah just nods, then looks up at me.

“One day we were on her bed while eating ice cream because she wanted it so much. I asked her what

name we were going to give to the baby. We spent hours going through baby names until we settled on

those two. It was so much fun, and we laughed a lot.”

Tears start filling his eyes once again, and I pull him to my side. It physically hurt to see him hurting. To see him in pain. I wanted to ease his heartache, but I didn’t have the power.

“When will she get better? I miss her so much,” he continues to cry.

I kept quiet because I have no answer to that. Not even the doctors know when or if Ava will wake up.

Mary kneels down to his level. She gently tugs at him a little. Noah doesn’t let me go, but he twists his

head to face her.

“Tell you what? How about I let you visit your sister? You’ll be the first person to see her,” she tells him.

“Really?” he asks as he wipes away his tears.

“Really” she smiles. “Just give me a few minutes, and I’ll come to get you. Is that okay?”

Noah nods his head as a small smile takes over his lips. The sadness is still there, but it’s been pushed

back.

When Mary stands up, I give her an appreciated nod. It may seem like a small thing, but she has done

something huge. She has given Noah hope. Something, or rather, someone to hold on to while he waits

for his mother to recover.

She nods to the rest and then turns to leave. Taking Noah’s hand, I lead him to the seats. I was damn

exhausted. Mentally, psychically, and emotionally. I could use some sleep, but I won’t get it until I see

both mother and child.

To my surprise, Calvin, Gunner and Kate walk in. Gunner’s hand is held firmly in Kate’s. They were chatting

while Calvin walked behind them. I can’t really tell whether they’ve told Gunner the truth.

I watch as Gunner’s eyes land on Emma. They become huge. I don’t understand that part, because I’m

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He let’s go of his grandmother’s hand and literally launches himself at Emma. Emma doesn’t have it though. She gently pushes him away from her with a look of disapproval. Gunner’s face falls, and tears start filling his eyes.

glares at Emma, as do Kate, Travis, and everyone else

shrinks into herself but doesn’t say a

and stare at Noah. He had his head on my shoulder and was holding my hand. His eyes were closed, but I knew

me look up, only to find Kate pointing a finger at

for Ava,” I

into something ugly. “I didn’t know that Ava was

you didn’t, since you know nothing about my daughter,”

powerhouse, especially as

“If

then you’re free to leave. Personally,

the first place, given that you treated

Kate up, but it also drenches up something that

open. He looks at the rest before looking

talking about?” He didn’t say the words loudly, but it was

everyone’s attention.

their faces. It’s like they’d completely forgotten that Noah was

buddy. It’s just a spat between adults. Nothing for you to worry

doesn’t buy it.

know what shit means, and grandpa is talking as if mom wasn’t

nears the end

afraid this day would come. I notice that everyone except

him that Theo was right without making him hate

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your baby sister?” Mary comes back out

for the distraction. Noah seems to

accompany him,” she says, turning around

nod my head

a separate room where they sanitize us before giving us a medical gown, gloves, and masks to wear. Once that is done, we are then taken to the NICU unit. We pass a few

us. “Noah,

she had me wrapped around her tiny fingers. She wasn’t my blood, but she already has my fucking heart in

to her lips and the piece of hair that was sticking out of her pink

feel my heart break watching the tubes sticking out of her. She

She’s alive.

Right. That’s what matters.

I hold her?” Noah

珍味

was already shaping up to be a great big brother. The love and

over his face. There is no fucking way you can

touch her

get his hands inside the incubator. He softly touches her cheeks, and

though she

lets us know it’s time for

Noah after we get out of the protective gear. I felt like I was in

present, but not at the same

my brother while taking a seat

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was by herself, and she

Ava. The nurse couldn’t let both of them in so Nora

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