Ex-Husband's Regret

Harper

This week has been completely hectic. It's like I've been running errands since I came back to this city without even taking a moment to rest.

At least Lilly is now more comfortable. Gabriel didn't agree to ship her mattress, given the one she has here is more comfortable, but he did agree to ship her sheets and blankets. It has made a difference, with her now sleeping the whole night.

Gabriel, where can I even begin? He comes home even if it's in the late hours, but that's the extent of it. We have been avoiding each other, trying to live like the other doesn't exist. I think it's better for us to do it this way. It will keep Lilly from seeing us fight all the time.

"Mom, you wanted to speak to me?" Lilly's voice pulls me back from to the present.

I put down the clothes I was folding, and sit on the bed before signaling her to do the same. She crosses the room with a frown and sits down next to me.

We were in my room. As you have guessed, Gabriel and I don't share a room. That is the one thing I don't know how to explain to Lilly. She'll be curious, given that Liam and I shared the master bedroom.

"Mom?"

"Sorry, there are a few things I wanted to explain to you," I tell her, pulling her close to me.

I need the strength to tell her what I've been hiding. It's not every day your mother tells you that the man you thought was your father isn't. The one thing I'm afraid of is her reaction. I know she'll be mad but I hope that she'll understand. But then again, how will she understand that I deliberately kept her from her biological father?

How can I tell her the entire truth without revealing the kind of man Gabriel is? Or how terrible of a husband he was back then?

That's where my dilemma stems from. How can I tell her the truth without telling her the entire truth?

"You want to start by explaining the shining diamond that you're currently rocking?" she asked with one eyebrow raised high.

I knew she noticed, but I didn't tell her anything. Since I didn't say a thing, she didn't ask... but I knew it was only a matter of time.

got married," I simply

I would have liked to be there with

tell her. This wasn't the kind of marriage she thought; it wasn't a love match. How was I going to explain that my marriage to Gabriel was

but you have to understand that things happened so fast," I began. "There wasn't any

"But why?"

able to understand right now, but when you're

older, I'll explain that my marriage was just a

I think of an answer that will placate

I finally

say when they don't want to answer a question," she muttered while rolling her eyes. "You could have

my baby girl so much, but deep down

that what you wanted to talk to

inside me, trying to seize me completely. This was the moment of

nervously. "It's

"Okay, shoot"

breathe, I decide to rip it off like

her hand in mine. "Gabriel is your

now so that makes him my stepdad," she said again, rolling her eyes. "I'm not stupid, mom, I know

classmates, back at home.

dad, your biological father," I whisper, my voice full of

as if she were trying to piece together the information I just told her. I

shouted, ripping hand from mine.

your father." tears fill my eyes