Ex-Husband's Regret

Emma.

"You have to get out of this room, Emma. You can't spend your days stuck in this dump." Mom told me, but I didn't even spare her look as my eyes were fixated on the sad series I was watching.

I sat in my bed, still in my pajamas, with some snacks scattered around my duvet. I had different drinks and a tub of ice cream, which I was currently drowning myself in. My curtains were closed, shutting off the sunlight since I'd gotten blackout curtains a few months ago.

"That's what I've been trying to tell her, but the damn woman won't listen to me," Molly fired.

I could feel her staring daggers at the side of my head, but that didn't bother me one bit. I just wanted to be left alone so that I could suffer in my misery. After all, I am the one who brought this upon myself. "What would Gunner say if he saw you like this? You are unkempt and so is your room. I don't even know when you last brushed your hair or showered," she said in a disapproving voice.

I perk up when I hear Gunner's name. Immediately, my eyes turned towards my mom.

"Did he ask for me? Does he want to come to voice?" I asked, hope coating my voice.

Mom has been spending time with him and so has Travis. They get to meet and as far as I can tell, things are going well. They don't like talking about him when I am around, because they know how much it hurts me that they get to be with him when I don't, but I've heard them talking when they thought I wasn't in the vicinity.

I got my answer when mom looked away and didn't say anything. My heart broke at that. The amount of guilt and regret that is eating me up can't be described. When he used to ask for me, I never bothered to give him the time of day.

I took him for granted and only saw him as a mistake that I regretted. Now he doesn't want anything to do with me and it breaks me. This is how he must have felt every time I ignored him. Karma was indeed a bitch, and she was serving me loads and loads of her specialty.

Molly cleared her throat before saying, "Come on, let's get you in the shower, then we can go out for lunch."

TV once again. "I don't really feel like

when she grabs the remote from the bed and switches off the TV.

you refused to grow up and accept that this is all your fault. Instead of wasting away

does it. I can count the number of times

she grabbed my

go of me, Mom!" I shout behind her, trying to pull away, but her grip just

get to my bathroom, she pushes me

trying to open the door, but it's completely

all, don't you dare curse at me, Emma," she yells back. "And second, this door will

so. I can hardly stand to look at myself in the mirror. I barely recognize the person

blame but myself. That is the one thing I hate about this whole thing. It

take off my clothes before jumping inside. I turn the heater to the hottest setting, then allow the hot water to wash over me. I

in there, Emma? It's been more than thirty minutes." Molly's voice is heard through the

been in here longer than I'd planned. Turning off the shower, I grab a towel and wrap it around my body. Again, I stand in front of the mirror. This time I look better

door. This time, it opens. Stepping out of

for you to wear," she tells me, pointing to a cute blue sundress. "Like I told you

Isn't it enough that I've taken

drained, and all I wanted to