Chapter 79: She’s awake!
**~ Hazel’s POV ~**
"Is she awake?"
"Hazel...?"
Voices. Familiar ones..muffled, cracking through the pounding in my skull like the aftermath of an explosion. Aurora’s silhouette hovered beside me, her hand carefully tipping a spoon toward my lips, whispering something I couldn’t quite catch.
Caspian’s hands were wrapped around mine, thumbs tracing soothing circles over my knuckles like he was holding onto a lifeline. Or maybe I was his.
My head throbbed. My chest ached.
My breath hitched, and my fingers trembled. I felt it. That pain. That... weight. The cold grip in my chest had loosened.
Wait...was that an emotion?
Did it come back?
Caspian’s grip on my hand tightened as his gaze met mine and his eyes shimmered. No, more than shimmered. They glowed with tears that clung to the corners, refusing to fall, but threatening with every breath.
"Oh my god," he whispered, a desperate grin cracking through his stunned face. "Hazel... it’s you. You’re back. It worked!"
Before I could even process it, he pulled me into his arms like he never wanted to let go again. His hold was warm, trembling, frantic.
Aurora exhaled a breath she must’ve been holding for days. Her shoulders dropped, eyes fluttering closed as if the entire war she’d been carrying eased in one moment.
And then everything came crashing back.
Like a tidal wave slamming into my soul.
The pain.
The sorrow.
The screams.
The bodies.
The blood.
The hurtful things they said.
The hurtful things I said.
The people I killed
It all came flooding back and it hurt. Oh god, it hurt so much. My chest heaved. My lungs burned. And then I whispered
Caspian’s name.
"Caspian," I choked, tears now freely falling. "I’m a monster."
pulled back, cupping my cheeks, eyes wide with fierce denial. "No. No, you’re not.
let it take over..I hurt people—I.." my voice broke, breath hitched, and
my voice shaking. "I need
"Hazel... what
said quickly. "Everyone keeps saying that...that he hated me. That he hurt me. But they don’t know. He didn’t. My mother wiped his memory. But before she did... he loved me. Even if it was just for a minute. He loved me. He was going to run away with
voice cracked. Panic was crawling its way
I haven’t.." My breath hitched. "I hope I haven’t killed
his head gently, his hand reaching
"No, she’s still alive. She’s just unconscious. Hazel, listen to me..your mom will wake up soon. And when she does, we’ll make a plan. We’ll find your
on to
he added, quieter this time, "As for your father... and Ariel... they’re gone. They’re
to ask. My eyes snapped across the room
he didn’t say a word. But he didn’t
the answer...It was him. He was the one who killed my
But Ariel?
staggered up. "No," I breathed.
reach for me again, but I
the room in two steps and grabbed Cayden by the shirt, slamming him
his face. "Why
answer. He didn’t
I slapped him hard. My hand
expression. No guilt. No pain.
was a child! She didn’t even get to live! Why are you
word echoed in
Monster.
And then... it
I stumbled back.
Monster.
now. Bitter. Because suddenly,
people who were just doing their jobs,
knees, shaking,
a monster," I whispered. "I’m also a
reached for me again, but I pushed
Cayden finally
called me a monster. All your life, Hazel. But now you know what it feels like. When your actions
up at him through blurry
the pain and the shame and
I couldn’t read him. Not anger.
emotions off. You got to disappear from the pain. But me? I’ve always been awake. I’ve always remembered. I’ve always had
turned to Caspian, his
going to wake Lilith. We need to find the babies. And
walked out—leaving
didn’t. They stayed
frozen, replaying every syllable.
about him all
busy labeling him as a monster that
to him but it wasn’t really a whisper to me. It echoed loud in my ears, like she was saying it
everything. She’s going through too much right now. She’s a paranoid mother who hasn’t
in them sliced through me. He didn’t want to leave—his whole body screamed to stay. But
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