Forrest

FORREST

“GOOD TO see you again, Forrest.” Dr. Diana Reed sat back to her chair after our handshakes.

“You too, Dr. Reed.” I took a seat on the couch across hers while she was taking her notes and pen.

She smiled. “So, what brings you here today?”

I rested my arms on my thighs and linked my fingers together. “I don’t know.”

She studied me for a while before she asked. “Have you been having trouble sleeping lately?”

“No.” I hated it when people tried to read me, but this woman helped me a lot over the years. Alan usually gave me a long speech to visit my therapist if he knew constant nightmares were keeping me awake, but this time, I came here willingly. For what reason? I didn’t know.

“Something’s bothering you.” She smiled knowingly. “Let me rephrase. Is someone keeping you awake?” She must have noticed the dark circles under my eyes.

I licked my lips and shifted on the couch. I always kept everything under wraps, but I didn’t have an excuse when it came to my therapy. I had to talk about it somehow. “What made you say that?”

“I am your therapist, Forrest. You said you don’t have trouble sleeping, then this might be something new. Tell me about it.”

“I can’t say that she’s a bother though.”

“But?”

There was definitely a but. Of course. I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn’t put what was bothering me into words. So I shut my mouth again.

“Okay. Tell me three things you think first thing in the morning.” She scribbled on her notes, then glanced back at me.

Fuck. Me.

“There’s nothing to be ashamed of, Forrest.”

“I am not ashamed, Dr. Reed.”

“Then you knew everything we discuss here is just between you and me. It’s normal to feel something toward a woman, to be sexually attracted over someone. And you’re young and good-looking.”

“I know. It’s just. It’s not about myself I am troubled about.”

“It’s normal to worry about someone.”

“Yeah. I guess so.”

“Let us think that you’re not talking to your therapist right now. Think of me as someone you trust.”

“I trust you, Dr. Reed.”

“So you have feelings for her.”

My gaze snapped at her. Her? Do I have? ”I am not sure.”

care about her.”

run and never come back. Something kept me from not doing so, instead, I crossed my legs,

me about it.”

knows that I’d been watching her. We don’t talk, I mean we exchanged his and hellos a couple of times, but we never got a chance to have a long chit-chat and talk about ourselves.”

not?”

have nothing in common. We have different perspectives about relationships.”

that two opposite people attract?”

 ”Maybe.” I

that you two have different

on her. I know it

“It’s alright. Tell me

start? I cleared my throat. “She’s straightforward, funny, quirky, beautiful, but what enticed me...” Enticed? Jesus. I wanted to hit myself in the head. “...is her loose-tongued sharpness. I know not most men like that quality in a woman, but I like her just the way she is.” Whatever her reasons for avoiding a relationship, I wouldn’t stop until I figure out. “I have

“That’s great. Go

I couldn’t escape, but I’ve been in a serious relationship as well. I can handle the temptation, I am good at that, but I believe sex has more meaning when two persons share it with special connections, with trust at least.”

you believe that she doesn’t believe in relationships?”

commitment-phobic. Her friends’ word.

it’s bothering you.”

just— the thing is—” Fuck! I sighed. Why does it hard for me to express? “These past

so?”

tell her to open up to me, besides, she already questioned my motives on why suddenly, I am talking to her. It’s a good thing though, that she doesn’t trust someone so easily. I mean unless I

her trust for her to open up

fact that I didn’t even know how to approach Megan or why I was so bothered, to begin with? It’d been almost two years since I’d been watching her, and I was satisfied with that arrangement. But lately, I couldn’t just watch her as she ruined her life with whatever she was trying to deal with alone. She needed someone. She needs me. Does she now, dumbass? I wanted her to need me and consider me as

thought that was it, but I was completely wrong. Something flipped inside me and told me to do something, and that I never did in a long time.

Dr. Reed was right, it was immensely bothering me.

it’s that

to trust

***

after an hour on the treadmill, a hundred push-ups, crunches, and sit-ups, but I wasn’t nearly satisfied, and my mind was somewhere else most of the time. The Fleur Gym was just next door from the tattoo shop, also owned by Alan. I didn’t know what I was doing here, the fact that I had a mini-gym in my pad. Perhaps, I needed

if we could talk over a coffee. I scoffed. Now, I’m weird. Over a coffee? Yeah, I kinda knew what coffee she liked. Just the word talk made me wince in embarrassments of not having guts to ask her. Every time I saw her number on my

wiping my sweat off my forehead, I slumped my ass to the bench, lied down flat, and did a few bench pressing. Then, I

heavily after stepping out of the treadmill. Then propped his hands on his hips, looking down at me. “Try sharing. It’s not

denied, raking my

balls already and just do whatever you are planning to do,” he added. Yeah, maybe it was easier said than

fine.” Pissed, I stood up and walked away

“Whatever grow your balls, Wood!”

need growing!”

I couldn’t let this thing mix up with my priority that I’d been investing over these years. Personal entanglement was the last thing I wanted. It would complicate things. I kept reminding myself that many times

what I’d become. Nothing was going

made friends. They’d grown on me, and I liked the feeling

A message popped up from my screen that had my heart leaped over

Sorry for this unusual message. I don’t even know what I am doing at the diner across the tattoo shop, but here

It was really from her because I had her number saved

 What are you doing here, Megan? Wanna get a tattoo?

the air, rereading my message if it was right to ask or I sounded like a stupid. Finally, I hit send.

you think? I don’t eat ink and needles.

her eyes. I typed