The Gang picks up my mood, milling around. Archie bounces about, yapping excitedly until Meg snaps at him and he sheers off. Then as the four play at rough-and-tumble under the table, Scruffy joins them and I snap. “Quiet! All of you!”

The dogs subside and assemble under the desk, panting. Ryan stares at me. “Kirstie?”

I shouldn’t have done that.

They’re only enjoying themselves…

Too much wine...

That’s what I tell myself anyway. “I’ll be back in a while. I’m taking the dogs out.”

He starts to rise from the chair. “I’ll keep you company.”

I shake my head. “No, it’s alright.” He stares after me as I exit the study.

Wrapping a thick scarf around my neck and tugging mittens onto hands, I call the dogs and once more they bounce jubilantly after me as I head outdoors.

I gasp at the frigid wall of air as I open the door. The Gang don’t seem to notice, tumbling out into the snow as I carefully pull the door closed behind me.

The icy air and brilliant sunshine are an instant antidote to my ill mood. Around me lies a vast sparkling snowscape, covering grass and shrub and tree, rolling down the mountain to where even the lake lies as a single glistening sheet.

What do I have to be miserable about?

Really?

I pace up and down in the snow, watching the dogs playing, racing around in silly circles, barking joyously.

What’s wrong with me?

Just nerves?

Self-analysis isn’t easy. Sometimes one must face unpleasant truths.

Is it just nerves?

Just anxiety about the biggest purchase I’m ever likely to make?

Or is it more?

Ryan…

I was single for years. Happily so.

And then Ryan appeared in my life.

I love you.

to be bound to

as he excavates a hole, spraying snow backwards and covering

I catch that mood

my neck and

I’m being watched…

Don’t be ridiculous…

Cautiously, I scan around.

said Baxter is still

Is he watching us?

freakingly fucking

Klempner’s still

on the edges of my vision

silently watching me, is Charlotte’s father. His face impassive, Klempner stands at the back of

complete idiot. “Oh, sorry. I

pleasantly. “You're not disturbing me. I just wanted some

a bit…” I wave my hands uselessly, not

My what?

I don’t know.

regards me for a

as though waiting for me to keep speaking. For some reason, I want to fill the silence. “There’s

slowly, pursing his lips. “So

me that perhaps there’s a reason I’m not the only one outside

is he out

“Are you alright?”

really know what to expect. I thought all that…”

the truth, I find it

is important,” I say. “It's important to Charlotte, certainly. I don't think she's had very many

his mug.

I remember who I'm talking to. That this solitary, silent man, is Lawrence Klempner:

he seems

someone

who’s not too

“What happened?” I ask.

to stay for Christmas. You have

I mean, you’re Lawrence Klempner…” His lips quirk… “… And

of my question and the possible consequences of my asking

so I finish… “…like what

mild, tinged with amusement. “What you expected? Yes, in fact I do

My cheeks burn…

huffs a laugh. “James did mention that you're apt to let your

Oh… Jeez…

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