I Am The Luna

SEBASTIAN. The first words my son says to me are of my failure to my family, a reminder that no matter what, this is a time period they will always look back on and know I was not here.

The intense emotions I’m feeling being in the same room as them for the first time make me want to pull the three of them into my arms and never let go.

I want to hug them, kiss them, apologise to them, make them laugh, play with them, wipe away their tears and promise I’ll always take care of them. Is this the love of a father? I don’t know how to explain what I’m feeling.

I love them; I love them so damn much. For the first time since they were born, we’re together, but I can’t simply pull them into my arms and promise them that from this day on everything will be alright. I am going to do my best to make up for the lost time.

They may only be three years old, but they are still old enough to understand everything. Zion’s question is proof of that. Zaia instantly moves forward, kneeling beside Zion as she holds our daughter.

“Zion, that’s because-” she begins, but I cut her off, placing a hand on her arm. Her heart skips a beat as our eyes meet, a questioning one in hers.

“I’m sorry son, but I hurt your Mommy and made her sad, so she decided to go away and take care of you where she knew you would be safe and happy,” ,”I explain, that lump in my throat going.

Zaia looks at me sharply, and I know she’s about to argue with me when I give her a look and shake my head.

“Let me handle this,” I say quietly. I know it’s been on her mind, but I can’t let the kids blame her for this. I was the one who messed everything up. The way I handled things was wrong.

Zion’s looking at me as he tries to remain brave and I reach out for his hands again and as much as I want to pull them into my arms and hug them both, I need them to be the ones to take the step willingly.

I clear my throat as silently as possible as I watch my son observe my hands.

“What did you do?” He asks curiously. His blue eyes remind me of mine, and I can’t help but smile faintly.

a smart little one, he gets that from his

I will always take care of all three of you. From here on I will never hurt

regret. There is no way I can forgive myself for that, even

only mess with my emotions even more. I want her so damn much, but I don’t understand

have. I want her in my arms. I want to wake up to her

know she’s still struggling with the past and I am willing to give her the time she needs. I just wish I understood what is going on in that mind of

being stretched out for this long. The jarring pain up my back and in my leg threatens to topple me over at any minute, but I am not about to let my body give in, in

Zaia once more before

and flings his arms around my neck, almost sending me backwards.

he holds onto me tightly, his heart beating strongly, and

my arms around

This is my son.

top of his head. I promise I will protect the three of you with

mind. The feel of his hold,

He’s already an Alpha ready to protect his mother despite

she hugs Sia, wanting to wipe those tears from her cheek.

My princess.

she nods slowly as she begins to move Sia

“Sia? I say softly.

hands over her mouth. The sound of her thumping heart reaches my ears, but a

It’s irregular…

me, and I remember Zaia telling me about

kisses her cheek softly.” Sia… Baby, look, it’s Daddy,” Zaia whispers gently, placing her on

but I reach over, brushing it back. She looks up at me, her heart skipping a beat, but this moment is not

to Sia, who has her head bent

onto me as he looks at

beautiful. The innocence on her face makes me want to

I try to contain

she rubs her eyes. I reach for her, pulling her into my arms and hug her tightly, kissing the top

than Zion and between her sobs, she gasps a few times, as if trying to get her

always going to be around, Princess. Always. So, no

has overwhelmed me far more than I could

and nods as she struggles to calm herself. I plant a soft

tickly!” She exclaims softly, making Zion

smile on her face lighting up my world and I realise this is

These two.

adjusting my position and sitting on the floor. I lean back against the bed as I