I Am The Luna

ZAIA.

I know I should have listened to him, but I truly believed I was doing the right thing. I honestly didn’t think things would end up this bad. The festering thoughts aren’t easing up, and I feel mentally exhausted.

“Go with him. Show Atticus his room. I’ll clean this up. “I tell Valerie gently. She’s shaken by it all, and I know she’s going through a lot. I hope she at least realises she does love him.

Everyone deserves a second chance, right?

She nods and I give her a smile, watching Atticus lift him carefully. “You did amazingly. Now go with him.” I whisper to her.

She’s about to say something, but instead, she simply smiles and nods before she helps Atticus with Jai, supporting his head. She’s got blood in her hair and over her clothes, but like me, she has far bigger things to be concerned about.

They leave the room and my smile fades as I slowly drop into one of the chairs, my face falling. No longer able to keep the mask of strength on my face.

Everything went wrong tonight… This was not what I was expecting to happen.

I wanted to make things right between the rogues and us, to prove that they were just like us… But they’re not, and the painful truth is they don’t like us and never wanted to create an alliance of peace.

Then Jai, Jai shouldn’t have gotten hurt He almost died because of me… How many more people’s lives will I be responsible for in the war that I have created?

I’m terrified. Terrified of what I can possibly do… I killed someone with no hesitation and the most chilling part is, I know I’ll do it all over again if I have to. I look down at my blood-covered hands. Look at the blood behind my fingernails…

Who am I becoming?

Do I even recognise myself?

hating

me it’s going to be ok… or simply just an

hands, brushing my hair back as I try to pull

but I can’t cry. There’s so much I need

“Zaia…”

the room and I quickly sit up looking away as I try to

“Hey…”

for the pain for when he

Stay, you need rest and it’s not safe.”

are here.”

were the ones who helped us escape and stopped those wolves that refused to pledge their allegiance to me. Even the rogues had run, clearly fearing

many did we lose?” I ask softly. He looks down, smiling slightly, but it’s something I realise is a reflex to hide his real emotions. “Seven.” He says softly. There’s a sadness in his eyes and although he’s

sorry,”

have

More deaths…

this is war, and my pack is ready.” He kneels before

right. We all misjudge situations. You were incredible out there. I’m damn proud of you. Who would have thought the pregnant woman seeking a home in my pack would become this

hair

are

I get to cleaning up the blood. Once everything is done and I have rolled the rug away, not wanting the children to see any signs of this tomorrow, I mop the entire floor. Finally,

car, and I’m still covered in blood. I need a bath Once everything is clean and I’ve disposed of the bloody clothes and towels, I head upstairs. I pop into the children’s room, they’re both fast asleep and I smile softly, feeling warmth fill my heart and I gently

make me feel stronger. I fuss with the blankets before I gently check Sia’s pulse,

slightly before turning onto her back and I gaze down at her, wishing all her pain and

so lightly, not wanting to get this filthy blood on them and then leave the room glancing at my

is in there, but if he is… he’s going to be angry. I enter the room, and the first thing that hits me is the smell of smoke. Then I see

frown on his face and

you fucked up. “He says when I’m about to step into the bathroom,

at him, feeling as if

the best way I possibly could. I’m trying.” I reply quietly. I don’t want to

memory of Olivan’s life fading before my eyes replays in my mind and the way I mercilessly flung his

do this tomorrow? I’m tired.”

just… want to be

you a clear warning, Zaia, a fucking warning not to go anywhere with them and you did just that.” He says as he advances on me. Our eyes meet and I’m just staring back into a pair of

and like I said, I messed up, I

I know where you stand in this twisted play of

stop.” I plead quietly. My heart is thundering, and I look up

hold me. He looks down at

“Zaia-”

soften. There’s regret, guilt, pain and so much more in them as

hitches as I close my eyes, sinking into his embrace. Sparks course through me, but more than that it’s the warmth and power of his embrace that cocoon me in this blanket of

my arms tightly around his waist, never wanting to let go. His heart is thudding hard and so is mine as I hold on tight, as if he might just slip

cheeks as he

don’t cry.” His voice is quiet yet

through the bond. ‘I wanted him dead