Jill Malik P.O.V

Amari wasn't part of the plan. When I decided to go to Jordan, I didn't knew that I was pregnant.

After two months, I suddenly got really sick and I started to vomit constantly. I couldn't eat, because everytime I did it immediately came out again. The idea of me being pregnant didn't even crossed my mind, because I thought that I was getting really sick because of all the things that had happened.

Irina on the other hand wasn't really sure about that. She bought a pregnancy test for me and after a lot of 'you should do it' I finally decided that maybe she was right. In the end, she was afterall. After visiting the doctor I heard that I was already three and a half months pregnant. The doctor told me that if it wasn't about all the stress lately, I wouldn't even become sick.

Ethan suggested that I had to tell Flynn about it, but that time I was still so mad at him. I didn't forgave him yet and I didn't wanted to tell him about it, because that meant that he would know where I was. Ethan tried to convince me to call or text Flynn, but I was so stubborn that I just didn't do it. I told him that I would do it after she was born. "I'll be ready to face him then." was my excuse.

When Amari was born, Ethan and Irina told me again to send a picture of her to Flynn. I was planning on doing it, but things got really hectic. Amari suddenly got sick and had to spend a week in the hospital, that I totally forgot about the picture.

And now, three years later Flynn still has no clue that he's a father.

"Mommy, where's dad?" Amari walked into my room while I was packing. I smiled at her and took her on my lap.

"He's in New York, babygirl."

"Is that far?" she asked as she rubbed her eyes. I played with her hair and nodded. "Yes, far far away."

Having Amari in my life changed me. She was my little princess. My little ray of sunshine. Her smile and chattering brightened up my day.

"But why is he not here?" she asked innocently. I let out a sigh and kissed her forehead. "You'll see him in a couple of days, okay. Now, go to aunt Irina and help her with the garden." Amari jumped out of my lap and ran out of my room.

I let out a sigh as I watch her leave. At moments like these I regret that I have never told Flynn about her. I really wanted him to see her grow up and hear her say first words. Sometimes I questioned myself if I'm the one at fault here. Sometimes I wished I would just hear him out instead of run away. But now there's no turning back. I already did it and it hurts.1

It hurts every day.

her. His smile, his laughter, and the

god, how was

he my prince charming. I thought our wedding was my happily

But no.

Fairytales don't exist.

in this cruel world, there's no happily

..........

going to see dad soon?" Amari asked as she tugged on my hand. I held Amari's hand firmly as I looked out for my driver. A couple hours ago I arrived in New York, Ethan

You'll see dad soon okay?" I looked at the black

He asked, removing his shades revealing hazel-green eyes.

Todd, Nice to meet you." I greeted the big headed bald man with hazel green eyes. He didn't look older than fifty. I wished I had other ways to describe him, but at this moment this was the only

placed all my suitcases

apartment?" I asked when he started the car. He looked through the rear view mirror and nodded

all the information." With that he started

beautiful, mommy." She pressed her nose against the window to see all the skyscrapers passing by. "D'you lived here?" She asked

the age of two and a half. This year she's turning three and she could easily pick up words and phrases. I only need to say something once and the

took her on my lap and nuzzled my nose in her hair. "I lived here with your dad three

and then hold three fingers up. "This is three. Is it a lot,

miss him." I whispered softly as I stared outside the window. Familiar

my chest tightened. Oh god,

hours before I left New York, three years

of food and poor Luca has to deal with mood swings every second of the day. One moment Reina is all

mommy---," Amari's voice woke me up from my thoughts. She was still not done with interrogating me. "Why'id dad never

mommy is a

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