Im -perfect

"What's was that all about ?"asked Selina who fell a step behind me , her tone inquisitive .

"Maybe he is so upset that its messing with his brains "I could only offer her this , Because I knew that there was a trap in laid there , Jacob Knight won't ask me on a date for no reason because I wasn't the girl who will get the guy.

The guy I deserved was most probably someone who will work a 24 *7 job in some stupid boring company not the one who rattles my entire body senses with his gorgeous smile .

And Jacob Knight most certainly falls into the latter category , with his razor sharp jawline sharp enough to cut glass and stormy gray eyes in which a person can practically lose himself.

Selina looked at me ,as if she knew what was going on my mind but thankfully she doesn't say anything to me , good , I don't need her pity .

But down deep down , I couldn't help be disappointed at the giddiness that was enveloping my heart .

Once I reach my home , I drag myself upstairs to my room , fighting my inner demons has sapped my energy .

I felt too tried to even think , part I wished to stop taking the high road and let myself indulge to whatever Jacob has to offer , part I knew that it was wrong , He has made my life in highschool hell from the past two years and I shouldn't ever think about being in such close proximity with him .

"He was joking ; He didn't mean it and you will be a nice little joke if you fall for his tricks "I repeated this mantra over and over again , to stop the monster roaring within .

Once I used to look down on those girls who's eyes will shine with little hearts in them , I rolled my eyes when they claimed they lost their control whenever a cute guy was around and therefore , it was sensible enough for them to make dumb decision .

Turns out I was just like them .

I can still feel it .

His warmth 

His breath 

His nearness 

God.Get a grip.

years I have been fighting my inner self, repeating it over and

But 

badly that I could still hear my heart thumping and I cannot lock my new found awareness about my feelings for Jacob into the darkness of my head as if

liked him , I fucking

I'm screwed

has to be him ? Just why did

meals a day

someone who counts his calories

wanted a stable

He was unpredictable 

nothing to offer

He had everything .

it was as if someone has stripped me naked , leaving my insecurities to unravel themselves .Its a struggle to breath, how am I supposed

bam’, pressing the play button on my phone

snuggle into my bed covers , I didn't dare to think about

be planning for the sake of a night pleasure ? Because that's all he will ever

That's right.

take care of these unwanted feelings ,Jacob might rule me the entire student body but he won't be ruling me much less my

will let my heart cry all it wants for a love it can never have and by tomorrow I will hold

close my eyes and let my tears loose for the love