In My Desperate Time

For the first time, I take Frances Louis' hand and walk out of NewFun with him. His car is parked on the right side of the door. It is the car that he drove when I first met him. How could I be so blind that don’t see it when I came in?

Being blew by the wind outdoor makes me sober. Suddenly I regret choosing to leave with Frances Louis, am I courting death?

Frances Louis pulls me into the car, but doesn’t start it. Some of those people, standing at the door of NewFun, are still looking at us, unwilling to give up.

“Don’t try to do anything to me. I won't allow you to do it.” I define my position seriously.

Probably Frances Louis thinks I look funny by talking like this. He fumbles out a cigarette and light it. I watch his movements with a kind of ecstasy.

I choke on his words and heard him continuing saying, “I, Frances Louis, will never take a girl’s advantage.”

“Don’t feel embarrassed to say it? Last time, in the hotel…”

subconsciously, but feel shame to say more.

Frances Louis understands what I am trying to say immediately, but he just shakes his head and says, “That

Didn’t touch me? How could it be?

body being sore and my legs are so weak. How could I be like that if I haven’t had sex with

Frances Louis seems to see through what I am thinking. He looks significantly at his right hand and says, “That night, my hand was a little sour.”

Hand?

that night, just like that day I his car?

don't know whether to be happy or sad. That night, I was seductive under the influence of

I can't get men interested? Or does he, like Andrew Malan,

I am suddenly frightened by my thoughts. I look at Frances Louis

you can try it by

The meaning of his words is obvious that he wants me to be his