In My Desperate Time

Noah murmurs after looking at me in disbelief for a long time, "Jane, what are you talking about?"

He looks devastated.

I can’t stand to say anything hurtful. And I almost fail to say the next words.

But I know that this may be my last chance to say it.

"I have to tell you very clearly that things between us doesn’t work. There are too many people stopping us from being together. Your parents, Frances, and the past that I don’t want to mention anymore. I don’t deserve you. I will hurt you. You are too good be ruined by me. The most important thing is, I don’t love you, Noah.”

I feel a touch of sadness in my heart when I say it out loud.

I used to believe that I would never forget my first love. I would keep him in mind for the rest of my life. But he is gradually being washed away. I don't know if it is because of the cruelty of time, or another person is taking over his place in my heart.

Noah takes two steps back, squeezing words from his throat with difficulty.

"You don’t love me anymore? Are you in love with him?"

He is not stupid. He is able to see through some things, but he is reluctant to face it. I know that he must have seen some clues judging from his escape in the past few days.

consent to him by

fall in love with him and love him

Noah sounds almost like he is choking. "Since this is your choice, I don't want to force you. But I believe you also know that I really love you, Jane. I hope you can live a happy life. A man like Frances is not suitable for you at all. One day, he will leave you and turn to another woman. But

Just then tears fall.

man in front of me,

be guilt. It may be I am moved

I can’t stop crying.

afraid of my rejection, so his hug is

you, Noah." I

I want to accompany you again one

refuse this

take pictures at every stop. He says that this

feel blue all day long. I am exhausted physically and mentally because I force myself

of the hotel, I hand the room key to

booked a room for

looks at me, but I

tonight, Jane? I just want to hug