Love Aint Always Pretty

Kophard

- when someone cuts you out of their life for good.

72

That night, I was on my bed inside my new apartment. I have transferred the minute I graduated and I moved to a bigger one. I bought it with my own savings with no help from my parents' cash which made me feel so proud of myself. I headed down to the kitchen and grabbed a can of beer from the fridge as I sit down on a chair. I gazed at my phone, it's already two twenty six in the morning.

I wonder if Nick is already sleeping on the same bed with Dakota. Well they are married. Damn, how the things changed between me and Nick so fast. It's like, I didn't even notice he could get married. Well I can't blame him. He's already twenty eight, he should be getting married. It's like the marrying age. Maybe I was still hoping he'll come back to me after everything, that's why it hurts so much now. I expected so much from Nick that he couldn't and wasn't willing to give me and I guess this beer is the answer, it still fucking hurts me though it's been almost 3 years.

As I look back and try to reminisce everything that happened to us as I try to think of a certain explanation why it still hurts me, I think the most definite reason is cos we didn't end well. We just lost track. Love was there but at the same time it wasn't and I guess what we had wasn't something normal people would do. What we had two years ago was special to me no matter how hideous it was. It's been so long and it's funny how it still bothers me.

You know, right now, I honestly wanna try texting him up again after a year. I wanna try if he still didn't change his number. I was still hoping if he didn't change his number, he might have been waiting for me to text him up. But his wife might kill me once I text her husband late at night and Dakota is my boss. I wouldn't want to get fired on my second day and I just need to stay cos they give good salary. I need to set limits now, he's already a married man.

Everything will change.

•••••

I have survived the entire week here in the publishing house perfectly fine. I did my job right, I turned in my 800-word article before the deadline and my seniors loved me cos I was being polite, kind and responsive to them. I work at my best when I'm told and I give all I could to make it perfect. I was doing fine cos Nick wasn't around anymore and no distraction. I heard his main office is at the Devaloines Enterprises, three blocks from here. Dakota seems to be really really nice too, I think that's why Nick liked her and married her.

I grabbed my stuff from my desk and headed out of my office. I took the elevator ride alongside the other employees from the other department and once I reached the lobby, I saw four people waiting on the lobby's couch and my smile reached to the ends of my face. They're here. They made it.

"Savannah!!"

I ran to them and I couldn't believe it that they're actually here. I just threw myself at Tracy first, then hugged Clyde then Alec and then Aries. I missed these guys so much and I'm glad to see them again. It has been a very long time and I wonder how they were after all these years.

"Happy birthday!" Tracy chirped.

I smiled. "Thank you! I'm so glad you guys made it here in New York!"

"Of course, we missed you angel and I think it's time for us to have a get together. Perfect time on your 22nd birthday too." Aries smiled at me.

"Is Channing coming over tonight?" Tracy asked me. I'm happy to see her getting fatter now though she still looks thin but at least she's gaining a little than the last time I saw her.

"No. He couldn't make it. He said he has a business trip to Rome but he already sent me his gift last Monday." I said.

As I look at my WSU friends, I guess the five of us had finally grew up. Looking at us now, we're all wearing something formal, suits, blazers, and ties. We weren't in our casual teenage style of clothing anymore, no more university jacket or fraternity shirts or even sneaks. Right now, as I look at us in our business attire or even an edgier grown up look, I feel so old too but it was a good feeling knowing that I still have them with me after a long time of not seeing each other.

"Let's grab dinner?" I offered.

All of us headed out and I got inside Aries' car cos mine was still for painting change. I lead the way for them and we arrived inside a restaurant. When we arrived and settled ourselves on our table, it still feels the same. It felt like we aged but we were still the same people from the past. Too bad Nick wasn't here. Tracy said he invited Nick but he didn't answer on her invitation.

We continued eating anyways and just talked about our lives now. I'm glad that Alec is engaged to a woman named Sara. Aries also had a girlfriend back in Seattle, he said she's not the permanent one. The usual Aries. Clyde and Tracy were still going strong together and they're also planning on settling down soon.

"Where's your boyfriend, angel?" Aries asked.

"He's in Vegas with his dad for work. He said he'll make it up to me once he's back home." I say.

Tracy holds my hand and smiled at me happily. "I'm glad you've found someone."

"Yeah. But working on your ex's company isn't really helping." I snorted.

The men laughed together.

"And you guys didn't even tell me he was already married. Nobody dared to." I say.

"We are terribly sorry." Clyde blurted.

"We couldn't tell you." Alec says.

ceremony was a shotgun wedding. Only Tracy went there." Aries added

moved my head to Tracy. "To be honest, I asked Nick if he was sure about it and he said he was. He said he had to. He had reasons of doing so. I don't know why he married Dakota either, he won't tell me. They eventually got married two months after Mrs. Devaloines'

her? All I can ever think of is money after he accepted that money from my father. Did he really want money from her? Or was it Mrs. Devaloines' death

Nick. I mean, he did stuff that

on. He's happy and I'm

doubt he's happy."

be a

trust her. There's something more about her

time for a get together. It's time to celebrate for my birthday, have fun and get drunk. We settled ourselves on

didn't you bring your women with you?"

having fever." Alec

is a workaholic. She needed to finish a report in Monday." Aries

wanted to meet them." I

Tracy nudge her elbow

walking towards our table, made my heart skip a beat. He came. I quickly looked away while everyone's eyes were looking at me. I shrugged them off as I feel my heart beating faster all of

see you man."

"Same Alec." Nick answered.

It's been a week since I saw Nick and he still makes me feel like this all the time he is around me. I should be getting used to this but I think Nick will always have this

called out to

when he called out my name. I moved my head to him and he's looking at me intently as the music Stay The Night by

"Yeah?" I answered.

"Happy birthday." He smiled.

I nod. "Thanks."

I ignored them and just

the bottle?" Alec

for Nick, were laughing together. I moved my eyes to Nick and he was just looking at me so I hurriedly looked away

just one

we too old for that?"

I'm sure Nick won't let you join as usual."

we were younger but Nick was just looking at me. Damn

music so

"Let's dance." Aries asked.

asked the rest of them but

Thanks. You guys go

you Tracy?"

"I'll pass. Maybe later."

second floor's dance floor and just started dancing. Aries and I weren't close enough but we were just having fun dancing along the

for more drinks. I gazed at my watch, already

I asked him. Shit, I think the alcohol is getting into. The words are spilling out

while I looked at Nick intently. "You already want me to leave?" He

"Your wife." I spit.

Nick stayed quiet.

must be looking for you now Mr. President." Damn it I need to control my mouth. Shut up Savannah. Shut up now. Just don't talk

a flight an hour ago to Paris for a

nodded at him. I forgot

"More drinks!" I exclaimed.

•••••

who was holding me and helped me get into a car. I know it was Aries' cos I came with him here so I settled myself on the passenger seat while my vision was all a blur. I hear

"Heeeey." I slurred.

"Sweetheart?"

Hiiiii Damon!" I drunkly

you sound funny? Are

a couple of drinks sweetie. Don't worry about me a

I hiccuped.