Mágoa
- a heartbreaking feeling that leaves long-lasting traces, visible in gestures and facial expressions
Origin: Portuguese
93
SAVANNAH'S POV
"I'll deal with Damon after Tracy's burial." Those were the words Nick said to me.
At some point, I have concluded that life really is unfair and uncertain. Unfair, because at some point the good people dies and the bad people lives. Uncertain, because we don't know how our life goes and when the people close to us will be gone or will return.
After Tracy's burial, all of us felt drained by how early she left us. I haven't even talked to her when I came here. I was planning on surprising her when me and Nick would fix things between us, but it's too late. She's gone and we won't see here anymore. It just hurts me as much as it hurts Nick because it felt like I lost a sister. A person very dear to me. A best friend and a loved one.
Patricia Veronica Wilde
1989-2017
"You'll always be in our hearts as a daughter, a sister, a friend and a best friend."
I take a good look at her tomb and the words engraved on it just rips my heart out from my chest. This will be one of the greatest loss in my life that has affected almost the people close to me. Nick wraps his arm around me and kissed my hair. I wiped my tear that was crawling on my cheeks.
"We'll be okay. She's in a better place now." Nick comforts me.
"It won't be the same without Tracy, Nick." I say.
"She's looking down at us from above. She's happy for us."
I see Dakota walking towards us with Hugh carrying Dani. Nick briefly hugs Dakota and shakes hand with Hugh then kisses Dani's forehead.
"Thanks for coming today." Nick tells them.
"Tracy has been a part of my life too. She's gone too soon." Dakota says.
"Everything will be okay daddy. Aunt Tracy is already with God." Dani says.
Nick smiles.
Dakota moved her eyes at me, "I'm glad you're here for Nick."
I smiled at her.
"Don't let him go this time. He's been crazy searching for you ever since you left for England." She gazes at Nick then looks back at me with a smile.
"I'm sorry I got in the way. He really loves you so much." She adds.
Nick takes a gentle grip on my arm and smiled at me.
"I was hoping on seeing your child today, is she here?" Dakota asked.
"She's in Aries' car, asleep." I answered.
She nods. "Well maybe we can have dinner together some other time? Dani told me Lissa is such a nice girl."
I smiled at her. I wasn't really expecting to be friends with my ex-boss. She was all over Nick that time and now look at us, I guess time makes you grow up and forget about everything that happened in the past, even the craziest mistakes we've done.
"We better go. Say goodbye to daddy, Dani." Dakota tells her daughter.
Nick moved closer to her and hugged Dani tight as he kisses her forehead.
"Be a good girl, alright Dani?" Nick said.
Dani nods and then she opened her arms to me too. I hugged her as well and the thought of it just makes me happy. "I'm happy I have a second mommy." She whispers to me.
I pulled myself away and smiled at her.
"Lissa will be very excited to see you again." I tell her.
"And I'm happy Lissa is my sister. I'm very happy aunt Savannah." She smiles.
At first I was really worried that she won't like Lissa because she'll have to with share Nick's attention, even though I know Nick isn't her father, but it turned out to be the least I expected it to be. Dani really likes Lissa and she treats her as her older sister. I don't blame them for not telling Dani about the truth yet, I'm just happy right now that everything is okay right now, between me and nick then with me and Dakota.
"We'll be going now." Dakota bids goodbye and I watch as Dani waves at us. Of course I waved back, she wasn't the kind of child that's hard to love.
I turned my attention to Nick who was already looking at Tracy's tomb. I held his cheek and he quickly looked at me.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
He takes a gentle grip on my waist and kissed my forehead then wraps his arms around me. "I'm glad you're here with me right now babe."
I smiled.
I missed that. "Say that again please."
He looked down at me. "Say what again?"
"The word you called me."
love hearing that
I nod.
you babe." he
I tiptoed and reached for his lips
•••••
though Tracy had left us, we still need to move on with our lives and even though I lost a great sister, she will always be with me. I know she will always be watching us and I'm sure she's happy
my parents this weekend and I'm bringing Lissa with me." I
at Nick and he just munches on his food. "I'm excited to see grandpa
her. "Me too,
dad?" Lissa asked Nick and I was just looking at him. He looks at me
you'll come with us daddy. That will
uncle Aries."
Aries looks at me.
weekend for a convention Lissa. I would love
Lissa pouts.
will
at
"Yes. Sure.
Nick. "I'll be texting
things I needed to do. By the way, I'm with
sweetie. It's been so long since I've seen you. There are a lot of things
you do need to explain a lot of things. I'll tell
bed where Nick is lying down right next to me. He had a glass of wine on his hand while the other was on my back.
you?"
his head sideways.
"Things like?"
glass and looks straight ahead.
case against him. I wanna tell them first. I
at that bastard that I want to
calling me lately but
pulled myself and stared at him. "If you're worried about how my father thinks, don't worry about it.
that about me. Just cos we had a fight with your father in the past doesn't
I slightly smiled.
sorry to hear about that, I
my dad for
at him. He only wanted what was good for you.
chest and he rubs my arm with his hand. "We'll go
I nod. "We will."
my head to him and started kissing his lips. He kisses me back and our tongue began fighting each other. I feel totally alive again when I felt his lips on me. He begins to move me down on the bed and he hovers his body on top of me. I placed my hand on his
"Mommy? Daddy?"
Lissa." I pushed Nick off of me. Nick begins to sit down on the bed and scratches the back
myself and stared at Lissa who
"Yes baby?" I breathe.
you and daddy? I can't sleep on my
"Don't you like your room baby? Mommy
smacked him
about to
"Come here honey. Of course you can sleep with
carried her up then placed her in
okay?" I asked
course." He smiles then kissed Lissa's
"Goodnight baby." He says.
and then
I tell
up and looks
cupped his cheek and he leans in
We hear Lissa giggling.
little girl." Nick nozzles onto her stomach and
•••••
I was amazed that they still lived inside our old house despite the financial crises they have been through. I helped Lissa off the car and Nick was the one bringing our bags. We were only staying here for a night. We stood right before the front door and my heart wasn't ready to see how my
a grip
He smiles ruefully. "Yes."
finally the door opens. It was Ingrid who opened the door and God she
me. She begins to cry and God knows what were the things she's been through while I was away for almost six years. We pulled ourselves
"Oh Nickie." She weeps.
grown up really
"You've gotten wrinkles too."
I laugh.
be Lissa." Ingrid squats be feel us. "Wow. The resemblance really shows." She says while
aunt. That sounded too old, but hello cutie pie."
Ingrid." Lissa
opens the
the place was still familiar to me and not a move from the furniture nor
and dad?" I
this weekend. Cameron will be here too. He's having dinner
"Busy?"
nods. "I'll show you your
find our rooms." I
still in high school. Lissa was holding my hand and she was just quiet, probably shy. When we got
mommy's old room." I
it mommy. It's all pink
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