Love Aint Always Pretty

Chapter 93: 93 Mágoa

Mágoa

- a heartbreaking feeling that leaves long-lasting traces, visible in gestures and facial expressions

Origin: Portuguese

93

SAVANNAH'S POV

"I'll deal with Damon after Tracy's burial." Those were the words Nick said to me.

At some point, I have concluded that life really is unfair and uncertain. Unfair, because at some point the good people dies and the bad people lives. Uncertain, because we don't know how our life goes and when the people close to us will be gone or will return.

After Tracy's burial, all of us felt drained by how early she left us. I haven't even talked to her when I came here. I was planning on surprising her when me and Nick would fix things between us, but it's too late. She's gone and we won't see here anymore. It just hurts me as much as it hurts Nick because it felt like I lost a sister. A person very dear to me. A best friend and a loved one.

Patricia Veronica Wilde

1989-2017

"You'll always be in our hearts as a daughter, a sister, a friend and a best friend."

I take a good look at her tomb and the words engraved on it just rips my heart out from my chest. This will be one of the greatest loss in my life that has affected almost the people close to me. Nick wraps his arm around me and kissed my hair. I wiped my tear that was crawling on my cheeks.

"We'll be okay. She's in a better place now." Nick comforts me.

"It won't be the same without Tracy, Nick." I say.

"She's looking down at us from above. She's happy for us."

I see Dakota walking towards us with Hugh carrying Dani. Nick briefly hugs Dakota and shakes hand with Hugh then kisses Dani's forehead.

"Thanks for coming today." Nick tells them.

"Tracy has been a part of my life too. She's gone too soon." Dakota says.

"Everything will be okay daddy. Aunt Tracy is already with God." Dani says.

Nick smiles.

Dakota moved her eyes at me, "I'm glad you're here for Nick."

I smiled at her.

"Don't let him go this time. He's been crazy searching for you ever since you left for England." She gazes at Nick then looks back at me with a smile.

"I'm sorry I got in the way. He really loves you so much." She adds.

Nick takes a gentle grip on my arm and smiled at me.

"I was hoping on seeing your child today, is she here?" Dakota asked.

"She's in Aries' car, asleep." I answered.

She nods. "Well maybe we can have dinner together some other time? Dani told me Lissa is such a nice girl."

I smiled at her. I wasn't really expecting to be friends with my ex-boss. She was all over Nick that time and now look at us, I guess time makes you grow up and forget about everything that happened in the past, even the craziest mistakes we've done.

"We better go. Say goodbye to daddy, Dani." Dakota tells her daughter.

Nick moved closer to her and hugged Dani tight as he kisses her forehead.

"Be a good girl, alright Dani?" Nick said.

Dani nods and then she opened her arms to me too. I hugged her as well and the thought of it just makes me happy. "I'm happy I have a second mommy." She whispers to me.

I pulled myself away and smiled at her.

"Lissa will be very excited to see you again." I tell her.

"And I'm happy Lissa is my sister. I'm very happy aunt Savannah." She smiles.

At first I was really worried that she won't like Lissa because she'll have to with share Nick's attention, even though I know Nick isn't her father, but it turned out to be the least I expected it to be. Dani really likes Lissa and she treats her as her older sister. I don't blame them for not telling Dani about the truth yet, I'm just happy right now that everything is okay right now, between me and nick then with me and Dakota.

"We'll be going now." Dakota bids goodbye and I watch as Dani waves at us. Of course I waved back, she wasn't the kind of child that's hard to love.

I turned my attention to Nick who was already looking at Tracy's tomb. I held his cheek and he quickly looked at me.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

He takes a gentle grip on my waist and kissed my forehead then wraps his arms around me. "I'm glad you're here with me right now babe."

I smiled.

I missed that. "Say that again please."

He looked down at me. "Say what again?"

"The word you called me."

love hearing

I nod.

you babe."

he said those words to me. I tiptoed and reached for his lips then kissed it. "I love you

•••••

grab some lunch together. Even though Tracy had left us, we still need to move on with our lives and even though I lost a great sister, she will always be with me. I know she will always be watching us and I'm sure she's happy for me and Nick. It just feels too bad that she

weekend and I'm bringing

at Nick and he just munches on his food. "I'm excited

her. "Me too,

you coming with us dad?" Lissa asked Nick and I was just looking at him. He

daddy. That will be fun." Lissa

you too uncle Aries."

Aries looks at me.

going back to France this weekend for a convention Lissa. I would love to go but you know how busy uncle Aries

Lissa pouts.

worry, your Daddy will come

at Nick.

nods. "Yes.

smiled at Nick. "I'll be texting mom about

York. Im sorry I didn't tell you right away. There were some things I needed to

back home sweetie. It's been so long since I've seen you. There are a lot of things I wanted to say. And you're with Nick you

mom. And you do need to explain a lot of things. I'll tell you when I come around. I love you.

where Nick is lying down right next to me. He had a glass of wine on his hand while the

you?" I

head sideways. "Nothing. I'm

"Things like?"

drink from his glass and looks straight ahead. "Shouldn't

to my parents before we file a case against him. I wanna tell them first. I wanna hear what my parents have been hiding

mad at that bastard that I want

calling me lately but don't worry I'm not picking

my father thinks, don't worry about it. I'm sure he'll feel worst now cos we're goddamn poor

Just cos we had a fight with your father in

I slightly smiled.

secret addiction to casino since before and I feel sorry to hear about that, I truly am. But I hate it how you put it that way." He

so mad at my dad for what he has done to

not mad at him. He only wanted what was good for you. Come

arm with his

I nod. "We will."

totally alive again when I felt his lips on me. He begins to

"Mommy? Daddy?"

pushed Nick off of me. Nick begins to sit

and stared at Lissa who was

"Yes baby?" I breathe.

I sleep with you and daddy? I can't

your room baby? Mommy and

I smacked him

was about to

myself. "Come here honey. Of

up then placed her in between us. I gaze at Nick

you okay?" I asked

course." He smiles then kissed Lissa's

"Goodnight baby." He says.

and then she kissed my cheek too.

I tell

and looks at me.

his cheek and he leans in to

We hear Lissa giggling.

to sleep little girl." Nick nozzles onto her

•••••

to my parents'. I was amazed that they still lived inside our old house despite the financial crises they have been through. I helped Lissa off the car and Nick was the one bringing our bags. We were only staying here for a night. We

take a grip on

He smiles ruefully. "Yes."

was Ingrid who opened the door and God she grew up really quick. Her eyes

to cry and God knows what were the things she's been through while I was away for almost six years. We pulled

"Oh Nickie." She weeps.

up really great. You just look like

"You've gotten wrinkles too."

I laugh.

be Lissa." Ingrid squats be feel us. "Wow.

sounded too old, but

aunt Ingrid."

stands and opens the door wider, "Come

the same. The warmth of the place was still familiar to me and not a move from

and dad?"

for this weekend. Cameron will be here

"Busy?"

nods. "I'll show you your

can find our

found myself heading to my old room where I was still in high school. Lissa was holding my hand and she was just quiet, probably shy. When we got inside my old room,

mommy's old room."

giggles, "I like it mommy. It's

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