I lay in the bathtub as Lydia washed my hair after Lucian had left to let me sleep some more. I knew she wanted to ask something but didn't know if she should, so she was silent.

"He kissed me," I said. Her eyes sparkled.

"Really? Finally!" she said, "How did it feel?"

"It felt..." I remembered when our lips touched the warmth that spread through my body and when our lips separated the emptiness and coldness that came with it. I wanted more, "It felt good," I said.

"But you just kissed nothing more?" she asked.

"No,"

"Don't worry there will be more," she said.

"Lydia?"

"Yes, my lady,"

"How does the first time feel?" I asked. She sensed that I was worried it would hurt and that I wouldn't like it. Just the thought of being naked in front of a man made my cheeks burn.

"Don't worry. I am sure his highness will be gentle since he seems to care for you" she said reassuring me "trust me, no man would have waited so long for the woman to agree. He would have taken you whether you liked it. I was actually worried for you my lady but now that I got to see his highness I am sure he is a good man and will take good care of you."

Everything she said was true. He never denied me anything and treated me well. I should be more understanding toward him and try to get close to him, but why am I afraid? Am I afraid of him? Or afraid of myself around him? It's like I don't have control over my body and mind around him, and his gaze and scent make me feel things I have never felt before.

"And you have to admit your husband is one very good looking man. I can see how the maids drool over him," she smiled "he must have a lot of mistresses," she continued but regretted it when she realized what she had said.

"I am sorry" she whispered with sad eyes, "I didn't mean to..."

"It's fine "I cut her off "It's not like I don't know". This was just my fate as a woman.

missed the way she dressed me and made my hair. She knew my taste and what suited me best

the special occasion today?"

since you have such a

you," I said as another

you like to

she walked away. I stood up from my seat to look myself closer in the mirror. I was wearing a wine red dress with long loose sleeves but bare

half and a curlier upper

Ylva," I said satisfied with how I

as you are happy, my lady,"

went to the garden where breakfast had

Luc..I mean his highness had breakfast?" I asked the

went to meet the crown prince. The king is unwell," she

that the quarter next to ours was the crown prince's quarters, so I went over. As I walked in Levi came running to me "My lady" he said with a smile "thank you for the meal last time I never got to thank you." He is such a sweet kid and well behaved. Crouching down to his level, "You

My lady?" his

"Yes"

"Please protect uncle Lucian"

"Why?" I asked curiously.

Unfortunately, most of them or almost all killed their brother to eliminate all kinds of threat to the throne. I never liked that idea, but I never thought much

I turned around. A soldier who seemed to be a higher rank according to his clothes, maybe a

I help you?"

crown prince and his highness Lucian" I

sorry but no one else is allowed to visit," he said politely. I had a

we met before?" I

wedding day." If he was one of Lucian's men and Lucian wasn't here, what was he doing here? Did he follow

you following me?"

but it's my duty to keep you safe" he said with his deep voice.

me escort you back, my lady. It's not

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