Klempner - Twenty-Six Years Ago
The air is glacial, but although the breeze whips through my hair, I’m not cold. Instead, invigorated, I feel strong and ready for anything.
Standing by the frozen sea, I watch the wind drawing snow across the ice in a whirling dervish of frozen granules that lash around my feet. And I think of the last time I did this, here, with her.
Valentine’s Day coming up… I’ll be back in time.
Get her a present…
What would she like?
Something regional? She loved Helsinki…
Some of the local food?
Then I remember her bending over the porcelain, throwing up gravlax and vodka in equal measure…
Maybe not…
Jewellery?
Still persuading her to wear the emeralds I gave her…
A piece of art?
?
?
Perfect.
I head for the town centre, searching for galleries and craft shops, not knowing just what I’m looking for.
But I’ll know it when I see it…
Most are full of the kind of useless knick-knacks that are met with an ‘Oh, how lovely. You shouldn’t have.” greeting, then get pushed to the back of the cupboard: I-Heart-Helsinki fridge-magnets, overpriced chocolates and tee-shirts, dolls in fake Laplander costumes.
Weirdly, some of the gift shops are stocked with mementoes which seem to me completely out of place. Who comes to Helsinki to buy posters of London buses or ‘New York They named it twice’ tee-shirts?
Am I missing something?
Nope…
And then, there it is.
Beautifully painted by some local artist with more Js and Ks in the name than English allows: a scene of the frozen sea, painted from almost where I stood only a couple of hours ago with ice grit-blasting my clothes. A couple stand hand-in-hand looking out over a glinting scene of white and blue, and in the distance, a lone figure sits fishing.
The price, like everything in Helsinki, is horrendous, but who cares? Money is nothing. Mitch is…
… Mitch.
Padded and carefully gift-wrapped, I tuck the package under my arm and head back for the ferry port.
Time to go home…
Home?
When did I ever think of home before?
She’s waiting.
*****
Michael
“How is she?”
Not good. I’d say she’s gotten past denial, but I almost wish she’d cry… Get it out of her system. Instead,
the loss of
over gaining a
Both bereft…
…
What a fucking mess.
probably the right word…” I say. “… Discovering she has a psychopath for a parent. It’s going to
his nose, eyes squeezing closed for a moment. “I think,” he says, “part of the problem is
father who
yes.” He rubs at the back of
of her funk. However…”
“Like?”
did she last have a bath? Or a
had a bath since we got back. Just sits there wallowing in pizza boxes and boil-in-a-minute noodles. I’m happy to cook anything we can get down her, but first, we have to get her attention.” He jerks his chin towards the lounge. “You want to get in
seat, rock the chair back, cross my ankles up on the table. “No, I don't think so.
to
Hugs aren’t carrying this one. She needs knocking back into reality.” James straightens up, plucks at a lip. “You might like to know,” I add, “that I
for a long second, then, “Come on then. You’d better be there too but stay in the background if you
to the lounge. Charlotte sits on the couch, hugging her knees, gazing slack-faced into the fire. She doesn’t appear
What’s she thinking...?
… Feeling….?
Fear?
Loss?
?
?
Humiliation?
“Charlotte?” There’s no
turn, maintaining her
his arms folded, “I expect you to
turns to face him.
“Come here.”
room to stand before him. “Yes, Master?” But she doesn’t
Yes… humiliation…
hair, unwashed since God-knows-when, hangs in greasy rat-tails and her face is sallow. Clothes are creased, spotted with what
Doesn’t smell great either…
squares up to her. “Charlotte, I am your Master. You will behave appropriately when we speak. Your face
Her voice chokes. “Master…”
Charlotte. Nothing has changed. Nothing. You are exactly the same person you were a few
at him. “But I’m not. I…” The words choke into
Finally crying?
Good…
sake
any different is inside your head. You are not Jenny, the child victim. You are Charlotte, the woman who reinvented herself, who knew what she wanted
where you wanted to go. Even though you knew it was dangerous. Even though your memories must have made that an appalling decision for you to take.” He’s still holding her, jolting her at
genetically, your sire… I don’t say father… that does not mean he has any power over you. Klempner has no hold over you unless you give
not she lets something that is part of her past control her present and
sobs
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