Klempner - Twenty-Six Years Ago

The air is glacial, but although the breeze whips through my hair, I’m not cold. Instead, invigorated, I feel strong and ready for anything.

Standing by the frozen sea, I watch the wind drawing snow across the ice in a whirling dervish of frozen granules that lash around my feet. And I think of the last time I did this, here, with her.

Valentine’s Day coming up… I’ll be back in time.

Get her a present…

What would she like?

Something regional? She loved Helsinki…

Some of the local food?

Then I remember her bending over the porcelain, throwing up gravlax and vodka in equal measure…

Maybe not…

Jewellery?

Still persuading her to wear the emeralds I gave her…

A piece of art?

?

?

Perfect.

I head for the town centre, searching for galleries and craft shops, not knowing just what I’m looking for.

But I’ll know it when I see it…

Most are full of the kind of useless knick-knacks that are met with an ‘Oh, how lovely. You shouldn’t have.” greeting, then get pushed to the back of the cupboard: I-Heart-Helsinki fridge-magnets, overpriced chocolates and tee-shirts, dolls in fake Laplander costumes.

Weirdly, some of the gift shops are stocked with mementoes which seem to me completely out of place. Who comes to Helsinki to buy posters of London buses or ‘New York They named it twice’ tee-shirts?

Am I missing something?

Nope…

And then, there it is.

Beautifully painted by some local artist with more Js and Ks in the name than English allows: a scene of the frozen sea, painted from almost where I stood only a couple of hours ago with ice grit-blasting my clothes. A couple stand hand-in-hand looking out over a glinting scene of white and blue, and in the distance, a lone figure sits fishing.

The price, like everything in Helsinki, is horrendous, but who cares? Money is nothing. Mitch is…

… Mitch.

Padded and carefully gift-wrapped, I tuck the package under my arm and head back for the ferry port.

Time to go home…

Home?

When did I ever think of home before?

She’s waiting.

*****

Michael

“How is she?”

same. Not good. I’d say she’s gotten past denial, but I almost wish she’d cry… Get it out of her system. Instead, she behaves as

mourning the loss

over

Both bereft…

What a fucking mess.

psychopath for a parent. It’s going to take

the bridge of his nose, eyes squeezing closed for a moment. “I think,” he says, “part of the problem is that not knowing much about him, she’s cooked up

perfect father who

out, yes.” He rubs at the back of his

it. We simply wait for her to come out of her funk. However…” I raise a forefinger… “… What we might

“Like?”

have a bath?

cook anything we can get down her, but first, we have to get her attention.” He jerks his chin towards the lounge. “You want to get in there again?

on the table. “No, I don't think so. Not this time. On this occasion, I think

to mine. “You

I think. Hugs aren’t carrying this one. She needs knocking back into reality.” James straightens up, plucks at a lip. “You might like to know,” I add, “that I turned

long second, then, “Come on then. You’d better be there too but stay in the background

couch, hugging her knees, gazing slack-faced into the fire. She

What’s she thinking...?

… Feeling….?

Fear?

Loss?

?

?

Humiliation?

There’s no softness in his

turn, maintaining her vigil

straight, his arms folded, “I expect you to look at

turns to face

“Come here.”

“Yes, Master?” But she doesn’t meet

Yes… humiliation…

with what look like tomato stains, and she’s still carrying traces of makeup she

Doesn’t smell great either…

“Charlotte, I am your Master. You will behave appropriately when we speak. Your face lowered in submission is acceptable. Your head hanging in

Her voice chokes. “Master…”

her by the shoulders, pinning her, almost shaking her. “Listen to me, Charlotte. Nothing has changed. Nothing. You are exactly the same

look at him. “But I’m not. I…” The

Finally crying?

Good…

sake

what she wanted and took on all comers to get it. The woman who took the world by the throat and shook until it gave her what she

you where you wanted to go. Even though you knew it was dangerous. Even though your memories

with assault and gang-rape. And just because that man might be, genetically, your sire… I don’t say father… that does not mean he has any power over you. Klempner has no hold over you unless you give it to him. And you are too strong to let that happen.

is whether or not she lets something that is part

sobs subsiding

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