53. Insecurity
YILEYNA
I awoke with a start, jolting upright in bed. I scanned the room frantically.
Alone.
I was alone.
My heart was pounding, and once again, the nightmare of the night my parents were killed was replaying in my mind. I ran my trembling hand through my hair, closing my eyes as the emotions that I tried to control hit me full force.
Focus Yileyna, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok…
No, it wasn’t ok… They died saving me and were marked as traitors. They were not traitors!
I had to prove their innocence! I had to…
Goddess…
I wrapped my arms around my legs, burying my head in my knees.
Focus.
Breathe…
What time was it? Where was Theon? Was he still not back?
‘They’re dead.’ Theon’s words from that night rang in my head, I felt the crushing agony in my chest break its restraint and hit me brutally. It was my fault. They died because of me.
I won’t cry.
I can’t.
But I was unable to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks as I pressed a fist against my chest, trying to control the pain that threatened to drown me.
It was my fault. They died because I was out there… Dad came to protect me.
dropping onto my side. The memories of that night, the wolves… the bodies… the fire… they played before my eyes like
Stop. Stop, Yileyna…
Think of something else…
How was it
to just go
he was stronger than me, taking hold of my arms and forcing me to turn towards him. A frown creased his brow, his shirt was hanging
wanting him to see the tears that
“What happened?”
it was missing the coldness it usually held, almost sounding
him seeing me like this. “Nothing. Nothing happened.” I whispered, trying to pull free from his hold, but he refused to let me go, pulling me upright and straight into his arms.
He whispered, stroking my
unable to control the
on the ground with me straddling him. My breasts were crushed against his chest, and his arms felt like a shield, protecting me
comforting, but the emotions and concern that seemed to be in his eyes and touch… Maybe it was the alcohol in his system, but I didn’t care, I needed something to keep me tethered from drowning in my pain, and he was here for me. He rubbed my back, sending sparks of pleasure through me, burying his head in my neck. We remained like that for a while, his scent and touch giving me the strength I needed to regain
“Talk to me, Yileyna.”
but I was ready to open up to him. I was tired of keeping it inside. But I couldn’t talk
whispered, pulling back so I could look into those amber eyes that I
eyes shadowed and he looked
“I know…”
them or
world.” I
earlier had only triggered these emotions within me, but I couldn’t stop
he reached up and cupped my neck, his thumbs brushing away my tears, only for
felt like everything was being snatched from my grasp… I know you deserve to be Beta… But when it was taken away from me, I felt like the last part of Mom and Dad
wasn’t able to control these emotions. I was breaking and I needed to tell
memories twisting within me. “I’m scared of losing everything I love…” I said quietly, looking up
sure, but I
what he was going to say but he took a deep breath, looking at me sharply, and I knew he had changed his mind. “They were
this. I knew my parents, they would never do this.” I said desperately. How can he say that? He knew my father! “And I’m going
eyes sharp as he tilted my head up slightly. “You
I won’t, because I know they were
and he didn’t reply, before clenching his jaw and
I know you’ll be ok.” He said quietly, almost as if he was speaking to himself over me. It confused me
“I will.”
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