53. Insecurity

YILEYNA

I awoke with a start, jolting upright in bed. I scanned the room frantically.

Alone.

I was alone.

My heart was pounding, and once again, the nightmare of the night my parents were killed was replaying in my mind. I ran my trembling hand through my hair, closing my eyes as the emotions that I tried to control hit me full force.

Focus Yileyna, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok…

No, it wasn’t ok… They died saving me and were marked as traitors. They were not traitors!

I had to prove their innocence! I had to…

Goddess…

I wrapped my arms around my legs, burying my head in my knees.

Focus.

Breathe…

What time was it? Where was Theon? Was he still not back?

‘They’re dead.’ Theon’s words from that night rang in my head, I felt the crushing agony in my chest break its restraint and hit me brutally. It was my fault. They died because of me.

I won’t cry.

I can’t.

But I was unable to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks as I pressed a fist against my chest, trying to control the pain that threatened to drown me.

It was my fault. They died because I was out there… Dad came to protect me.

my lips, and I curled up, dropping onto my side. The memories of that night, the wolves… the bodies…

Stop. Stop, Yileyna…

Think of something else…

these odd abilities? How was it

to just go away. The bedroom door

creased his brow, his shirt was hanging open, his hair was a mess as if he had run his fingers through it repeatedly, and the distinct smell of alcohol

him to see the tears that were

“What happened?”

it was missing the coldness it usually held, almost

his hold, but he refused to let me go, pulling me upright and straight into his arms. My breath hitched, I fought to control my emotions as

little storm?” He

unable to control the sob that left my

control of my emotions. I locked my arms around his neck and he instantly pulled me closer, sitting back on the ground with me straddling him. My breasts were crushed against his chest, and his arms felt like a shield,

something to keep me tethered from drowning in my pain, and he was here for me. He rubbed my back, sending

“Talk to me, Yileyna.”

know we argued earlier, but I was ready to open up to him. I was tired of keeping it inside. But I couldn’t talk about them

I whispered, pulling back so I could look

and he looked

“I know…”

care if one of them or both are not my blood,

were my world.” I

only triggered these emotions within

nodded, but didn’t say anything. Instead, he reached up and cupped my neck, his thumbs brushing away my tears, only for more to fall in their

like everything was being snatched from my grasp… I know you deserve to be Beta… But when it was taken away

hated feeling so vulnerable, but I wasn’t able to control these emotions. I was

looking up into his shimmering eyes. I’m scared of losing

him away by acting so vulnerable and needy? I wasn’t sure, but I couldn’t keep it inside

I wasn’t sure what he was going to say but he took a deep breath, looking at me

would never do this.” I said desperately. How can he say that? He knew my father! “And I’m going

as he tilted my head up slightly. “You might regret what you find

won’t, because I know

reply, before clenching his jaw and

He said quietly, almost as if he was speaking to himself over me. It confused me

“I will.”

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