53. Insecurity

YILEYNA

I awoke with a start, jolting upright in bed. I scanned the room frantically.

Alone.

I was alone.

My heart was pounding, and once again, the nightmare of the night my parents were killed was replaying in my mind. I ran my trembling hand through my hair, closing my eyes as the emotions that I tried to control hit me full force.

Focus Yileyna, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok…

No, it wasn’t ok… They died saving me and were marked as traitors. They were not traitors!

I had to prove their innocence! I had to…

Goddess…

I wrapped my arms around my legs, burying my head in my knees.

Focus.

Breathe…

What time was it? Where was Theon? Was he still not back?

‘They’re dead.’ Theon’s words from that night rang in my head, I felt the crushing agony in my chest break its restraint and hit me brutally. It was my fault. They died because of me.

I won’t cry.

I can’t.

But I was unable to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks as I pressed a fist against my chest, trying to control the pain that threatened to drown me.

It was my fault. They died because I was out there… Dad came to protect me.

left my lips, and I curled up, dropping onto my side. The memories of that night, the wolves… the bodies… the fire… they played before my eyes like a

Stop. Stop, Yileyna…

Think of something else…

abilities? How was it possible? The daughter of

me and I wanted it all to just go away. The bedroom door opened, and I

stronger than me, taking hold of my arms and forcing me to turn towards him. A frown creased his brow, his shirt was hanging open, his hair was a mess as if he had run his fingers through it repeatedly,

not wanting him to see the tears that were streaming down my

“What happened?”

was husky and low, but it was missing the coldness it usually held, almost

whispered, trying to pull free from his hold, but he refused to let me go, pulling me upright and straight

He

was unable to control the sob that left

sitting back on the ground with me straddling him. My breasts were crushed against his chest, and his arms felt like a shield, protecting me from the world as he gently rocked

touch… Maybe it was the alcohol in his system, but I didn’t care, I needed something to keep me tethered from drowning in my pain, and he was here for me. He rubbed my back, sending sparks of pleasure through me, burying his head in my neck. We remained like that for a while, his scent and touch giving

“Talk to me, Yileyna.”

up to him. I was tired of keeping it inside. But I couldn’t talk about them

them.” I whispered, pulling back so I could look into those amber eyes that

eyes shadowed and he

“I know…”

don’t care if one of them or

my world.” I said

triggered these emotions within me, but I couldn’t

my neck, his thumbs brushing away my tears, only for more to fall in

know you deserve to be Beta… But when it was taken away from me, I felt like the last part of Mom and Dad I had was taken from me

hated feeling so vulnerable, but I wasn’t able to control these emotions.

looking up into his shimmering eyes. I’m scared of losing you. I love you. I

needy? I wasn’t sure, but

at me sharply,

do this.” I said desperately. How can he say that? He knew

head up slightly. “You might regret what you find

won’t, because I

reply,

He said quietly, almost as if he was speaking

“I will.”

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