53. Insecurity

YILEYNA

I awoke with a start, jolting upright in bed. I scanned the room frantically.

Alone.

I was alone.

My heart was pounding, and once again, the nightmare of the night my parents were killed was replaying in my mind. I ran my trembling hand through my hair, closing my eyes as the emotions that I tried to control hit me full force.

Focus Yileyna, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok…

No, it wasn’t ok… They died saving me and were marked as traitors. They were not traitors!

I had to prove their innocence! I had to…

Goddess…

I wrapped my arms around my legs, burying my head in my knees.

Focus.

Breathe…

What time was it? Where was Theon? Was he still not back?

‘They’re dead.’ Theon’s words from that night rang in my head, I felt the crushing agony in my chest break its restraint and hit me brutally. It was my fault. They died because of me.

I won’t cry.

I can’t.

But I was unable to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks as I pressed a fist against my chest, trying to control the pain that threatened to drown me.

It was my fault. They died because I was out there… Dad came to protect me.

sob left my lips, and I curled up, dropping onto my side. The memories of that night, the wolves… the bodies… the fire… they played

Stop. Stop, Yileyna…

Think of something else…

I have these odd abilities? How was it possible?

just go away. The bedroom door opened,

was stronger than me, taking hold of my arms and forcing me to turn towards him. A frown creased his brow, his shirt was hanging open, his hair was a mess as if he had run his fingers through it repeatedly, and

him to see the tears that were streaming down my

“What happened?”

it was missing

this. “Nothing. Nothing happened.” I whispered, trying to pull free from his hold, but he refused to let me go, pulling me upright and straight

little storm?” He whispered, stroking

unable to control the sob that left

all control of my emotions. I locked my arms around his neck and he instantly pulled me closer, sitting back on the ground with me

the alcohol in his system, but I didn’t care, I needed something to keep me tethered from drowning in my pain, and he was here for me. He rubbed my back, sending sparks of pleasure through me, burying his head in my neck. We remained like that for a while,

“Talk to me, Yileyna.”

was ready to open up to him. I was tired

I could look into those

and he looked

“I know…”

I don’t care if one of them or both are not my

were my world.”

revelation from earlier had only triggered these

and cupped my neck, his thumbs

it was taken away from me, I felt like the last

hated feeling so vulnerable, but I wasn’t able to control these

scared of losing everything I love…” I said quietly, looking up

away by acting so vulnerable and needy? I wasn’t sure, but I couldn’t keep it inside of

say but he took a deep breath, looking at me sharply, and I knew he had changed

my parents, they would never do this.” I said desperately.

my head up slightly. “You might regret what you find out.”

because I know they were

he didn’t reply, before clenching his jaw and

Yileyna… Even when the world turns its back on you, I know you’ll be ok.” He said quietly, almost as if he

“I will.”

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