53. Insecurity

YILEYNA

I awoke with a start, jolting upright in bed. I scanned the room frantically.

Alone.

I was alone.

My heart was pounding, and once again, the nightmare of the night my parents were killed was replaying in my mind. I ran my trembling hand through my hair, closing my eyes as the emotions that I tried to control hit me full force.

Focus Yileyna, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok…

No, it wasn’t ok… They died saving me and were marked as traitors. They were not traitors!

I had to prove their innocence! I had to…

Goddess…

I wrapped my arms around my legs, burying my head in my knees.

Focus.

Breathe…

What time was it? Where was Theon? Was he still not back?

‘They’re dead.’ Theon’s words from that night rang in my head, I felt the crushing agony in my chest break its restraint and hit me brutally. It was my fault. They died because of me.

I won’t cry.

I can’t.

But I was unable to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks as I pressed a fist against my chest, trying to control the pain that threatened to drown me.

It was my fault. They died because I was out there… Dad came to protect me.

lips, and I curled up, dropping onto my side. The memories of that night, the wolves… the bodies… the

Stop. Stop, Yileyna…

Think of something else…

was it possible? The

them. The fear of the unknown terrified me and I wanted it all to just go away. The bedroom door opened, and

him to see my tears, but he was stronger than me, taking hold of my arms and forcing me to turn towards him. A frown creased his brow, his shirt was hanging open,

looked away, not wanting him to see the tears that were streaming down my

“What happened?”

husky and low, but it was missing

hated him seeing me like this. “Nothing. Nothing happened.” I whispered, trying to pull free from his hold, but he refused to let me go, pulling me upright and straight into his arms. My breath hitched,

wrong, little storm?” He whispered, stroking my

control the sob that

and he instantly pulled me closer, sitting back on the ground with me straddling him. My breasts were crushed against

me tethered from drowning in my pain, and he was here for me. He rubbed my back, sending sparks of pleasure through me, burying his head in my neck. We

“Talk to me, Yileyna.”

we argued earlier, but I was ready to open up to him. I was tired of keeping it inside. But I couldn’t talk about

pulling back so I could look into those amber eyes

and he

“I know…”

don’t care if one of them or both are not my blood, they are

world.”

from earlier had only triggered these emotions within me, but I

my neck, his thumbs brushing

it was taken away from

control these emotions. I was breaking and

the pain of my memories twisting within me. “I’m scared of losing everything I love…” I said quietly, looking up into his shimmering eyes. I’m scared of

acting so vulnerable and needy? I wasn’t sure, but I couldn’t

was going to say but he took a deep breath, looking at me sharply, and

this. I knew my parents, they would never do this.” I said

as he tilted my head up slightly. “You might regret what you

I won’t, because I

and he didn’t reply, before

Even when the world turns its back on you, I know you’ll be ok.” He said quietly, almost as if he was speaking to himself

“I will.”

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