My Secret, My Bully, My Mates

Chapter 0039

His avoidance of me shouldn't hurt, it's been like this my whole life. He only talks to me when he absolutely has to in front of other high ranking wolves for appearance. But, every time he outwardly and blatantly rejected me I felt that familiar jab in my heart and all of my insecurities would haunt me for days after.

I became more obsessed with training and school work, avoiding people, including Sierra and my brother after that interaction shortly after the christmas holiday. Something they both noticed and questioned and I expertly avoided talking about. My room and anything I used in the house had to be spotless and meticulously put away. The sad part is am fully aware of what I'm doing and why, but I can't help myself and I can't go to anyone for help. How would that make my dad look in the eyes of his peers? The peers he's been putting on a show for my whole existence.

Ruining his reputation would make the emotional hell I have been going through completely worthless and I don't need to feel anymore like an unwanted problem. And as much as I should be mad at him or hate him, I just can't bring myself to make him look bad, hoping one day he will wake up and notice all the hard work and effort I put in to please him, to make him happy, proud of me. As long as there is that scrap of a chance, I will hold onto that hope. It took several days

to pull me, mostly, out of the obsessive behavior. Really, I think I just got better

working on the breakfast spread. I really do like having Sierra and all the guys here. I find I enjoy caring for the group as a whole. They make me laugh and forget about all the things I normally focus on everyday. I actually feel like a teenager during this time and I find I

the hell is going on? The commotion in the hallway tells me it's at least a few of the guys. Their sounds are pretty distinct. I start to walk out to tell them to be quiet, I haven't even gotten Mateo up yet and my dad will actually be pissed at the ruckus this early. I slowly walk down the hallway and into

"Guys? What ar-"

A whole group of people

I yelled and then clapped my hand over my mouth as I'm trying not to fall on my butt in front

we would surprise you. We brought breakfast, I hope you haven't already started cooking." She steps back and takes in my running clothes. I don't usually shower or change since we go and workout with the pups, which leaves