Surrogate For Alpha Dom

Ella

It’s been three weeks since the ball, and though I can scarcely believe it, it seems like all the campaign drama passed with Solstice. There has been nothing but calm since the holidays, and I’m beyond thrilled that I’ve been able to relax a bit, even though part of me is waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under us.

I’ve spent my time pouring over baby books, making plans for our nursery, and brainstorming baby names – and the best past is that I’ve felt less nauseated and achy every day. In fact, yesterday marked the beginning of my second trimester – since shifter pregnancies are so short – and it seems impossible to think my baby will arrive in four short months. My stress has already eased knowing I’m leaving the most vulnerable phase of my pregnancy behind, and I don’t even mind that I’ve been seeing Sinclair less now that he’s gone back to a regular work schedule.

Well, that’s not entirely true. I miss him. I miss him much more than I should, but I’m also grateful for the space. It’s much easier to resist our attraction to each other when we’re not constantly together and taking part in intimate rituals and romantic outings.

I don’t know why you’re being so stubborn. The little voice in my head mutters. If you’re going to give in eventually, why not throw in the towel now and enjoy being together in the last months before the baby comes? You do realize that in another four months you’ll never be alone again.

I’m not having this argument again. I decide. We agreed it’s better for the baby if we can co-parent without our own relationship drama getting in the way.

You mean you decided and he went along with it because he doesn’t know it’s such a stupid reason. My conscience snipes.

It’s not stupid! I insist. I’m going to be a mother, I have to put my baby first – that’s what being a parent is all about.

You keep telling yourself that. The voice derides. We both know you’re just a big scaredy cat.

Oh put a sock in it! I exclaim, losing my patience. “Stupid conscience.” I mutter aloud, sorting through the clothing racks in my giant closet and trying to choose an outfit for our parenting class tonight. “Uppity, annoying, impossible…”

“Talking to yourself, trouble?” Sinclair’s deep voice breaks through my angry diatribe, and I jump about ten feet in the air.

find him leaning in the closet doorway,

me into his arms, petting me gently. “I’m

ridiculous shifter stealth that’s the problem. It’s not right that anyone as big as

a smile. “It’s my fault, I’m a big hulking beast and I need to do a better job of stomping

narrowing my

“Is there any way I can

back to my closet, beginning to rifle through trouser options. “Nothing fits anymore.” I

anymore, but they

giant pup is coming closer to pushing my body past its limits. Normal women don’t show this much at this stage you know.” My throat is stinging with the threat of tears, even though I know I’m being unreasonable. I feel like I’m on a

a rough day, aren’t you, sweetheart?” I can hear the guilt in his voice, and it makes me want to cry all the more. He’s been working from home a lot and I can tell he feels like he’s neglecting us, but there’s also nothing to be done. He bears so much responsibility, and it’s only going to get worse if he wins the crown. Suddenly I feel terrible for being so grumpy with him, when he’s already blaming himself despite doing everything he can to take

sniffle. “I shouldn’t be giving

dress from the clothing rack. “Here, no buttons, no zippers. You don’t even have to wear

snuggles me until I’ve had my fill, and half an hour later we’re back on the padded floors of our monthly birthing

now that you’re out of the first trimester, but this is the time when your hormones really kick into high gear. You may already be experiencing some intense mood swings, as well as physical changes to things like hair growth or skin pigmentation.” She looks around at the couples spread out on the mats, and I see I’m not the only expectant mother looking sheepish

also experience heightened libidos – something I encourage you all to take advantage of, as you won’t

pregnancy, but I also hadn’t understood how powerless I’d be to my hormones. I’d assumed it would be like PMS mood swings, not these constant extremes. The instructor is still speaking. “Bottom line, mates, it’s your job to keep Mom satisfied and relaxed during these next

the same advice in human birthing classes. I mutter

voice sounds in my mind. You should see the