Hunter

I had never experienced what a real heartbreak felt like until now; the heartache, it was unbearable. Blue had literally reached inside my chest, ripped out my heart and crushed it with bare hands.

I almost regretted going after her like that. I should have just let it go. She had clearly told me she didn’t want me, what else did I need to prove?

I literally drove around without paying attention to where I was going. Instead of going to my house, I drove to my father’s because I didn’t trust myself to be alone at that moment. I was desperate and my toxic imagination was driving me insane.

I parked the car in the parking space and cut the engine.

I clenched and unclenched the steering wheel. The image of Blue standing next to Adrian made me so ill I could taste bile in my throat. And my imagination was pretty fucking wild if you ask me.

The images kept pushing through, of Blue getting naked with Adrian and the two of them together doing things that we’d once done together.

Where had I gone wrong? We were married, she and I. She loved me, or at least she used to and then she’d gone ahead and ruined everything by sleeping with another man.

Maybe this was karma coming for me; for all the girls that I’d slept with and never responded to their messages. Hell, I’d been bad, I’d broken several hearts but by god, I never led anyone on, never been in a real relationship, and never cheated on someone. I never looked at another woman while I was in love with Blue.

So why did I deserve this again?

With shaky hands, I reached for a bottle of Jack that I kept stashed in my car for emergencies like these and took a long drink. Only after I’d emptied it, I stepped out of the car.

Inside the house, I walked into the housekeeper. “Nana, is mom home?”

She appeared to be flabbergasted for a moment; for the fact that I’d turned up drunk or because I called Elaine “Mom”, I wasn’t sure.

“She’s upstairs in her room.” She told me, “Are you alright, Hunter?”

“Not really,” I muttered before climbing the stairs.

I knocked on her door once when I heard a soft confirmation, I walked inside. Elaine was seated by the study table near the bay window, typing on her laptop. She was a fashion blogger and used to be a model so when she married my dad, she stopped her modeling work.

“Hey.” She called out as she looked at me once before turning to the computer and then quickly did another double-take.

I must look like a mess for her to look at me with so much pity.

“Hey honey, how nice of you to drop by,” She said, smiling up at me.

I kneeled down in front of her while she was still sitting in her chair and placed my head in her lap.

She must be shocked to find me literally begging for her affection, considering the fact that I had always rejected her for years. It’s not that I hated Elaine, I just hated myself.

second before her fingers slowly caressed my hair.

my face but I

me.”

never came to her with my problems, not that I went to anybody. I just bottled up my sorrow, didn’t talk to people and in the past that seemed to have

Not this time though.

about

sobs heaving from the depths of my

man brawling so loudly like a child who had lost

face in her lap and cried and cried while she stroked

be given the Mother of the Year award because

love

never coming back to me,”

you say

me anymore,” I choked, still sobbing like a fucking baby. “I saw her today at the supermarket. She’s pregnant with another man’s child. She doesn’t even want to speak

to her mouth.

was standing

about Adrian made my blood boil. I wanted to hit a

she wasn’t trying to feed me some pity speech, she

of pussy, crying my eyes out

then added, “Secondly, grown men cry all the time. There’s nothing

might have gotten a little obsessive over her sometimes but what man doesn’t get like that over his wife? I’m sure dad did that

“Yeah, he did that.” She recalled. “He was overbearing a lot of

all these years. There has to be something wrong with me.” The tears were still streaming down my

just like

not taking that as a

sweet and a little rough around the edges, like your dad, but your brother Ryan’s different, he’s like an

Getting arrested, running away from home, transferring schools. I gave you a hard time in my late teens. I was not a

some conditions for me; he said he wouldn’t marry me if I didn’t keep

He would put conditions applied to a marriage. I

he say?” I

in front of anyone. You, on the other hand, it’s a different story. He said and I quote him because I remember his words exactly ‘Hunter is a rebellion and he is difficult to love. He will reject you, tell you things he doesn’t mean, make you cry but you still have to continue to love him like I do, will you do that for me?’ He asked me, Hunt, and at first I wasn’t sure if I was doing the right thing by you but slowly

was speechless. Dad really cared

not a bad person, Honey, your circumstances

more than she liked me and now she’s pregnant with his kid. I can’t be selfish and force

can’t.” Mom said. “You can’t

life,” I complained. “I don’t even think I

Kyoto will especially be beautiful right now, you know with the Cherry Blossom season coming along. Take Fred with you.

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