“Emma! My little girl.” She releases Sophie’s hand and reaches out to me, her other one bound in a cast and strapped to her chest. I hesitate, straighten my tailored pants, and blouse and walk toward her dutifully, bracing myself so that I stay calm and in control.

“Mother.” I take her hand; it’s cold and smooth but feels like skin and bone and it angers me. She’s obviously not eating properly again, so caught up in another affair of the heart, bogged down with infatuation. She was always good at ignoring her own basic needs when wrapped up in another unhealthy relationship.

“It’s so good to see you … You came home to Chicago for me!” her voice is soft and injured causing the reaction to catch in my throat. Guilt, tears, anger, a chaos of emotions, and I can’t look at her in the face, already uncomfortable holding her hand. I glare out the side window over the buildings in Chicago and the dull weather outside, trying to remain impassive. Trying to steel against all that she makes me feel. I want her to cut the crap with the over sentimental greeting, it’s obviously purely for Sophie’s benefit.

“What have you told the police?” I smart. I don’t want to do this tear-jerking deep conversation crap with her. I just want to make sure she’s okay, that she’s healing, then I want to get the hell out of this place. As soon as earthly possible.

“Emma, please? You know it’s never that straightforward,” she whines, and I bristle and drop her hand coldly. My face snapping around to lock eyes with her in impulsive rage. Same old familiar conversation.

“You’re kidding me, right?” I snort in disbelief, spinning my body around to match my glare.

“You have no idea, Emma, you don’t know what happened.” Her voice seems suddenly stronger, losing all ounce of vulnerability now that I’m peeking anger at her.

“I don’t need to, it never changes. Who was it this time? Another five-minute romance or is this someone longer term? How often has this one hit you huh?” I snap; my temper getting the better of me and Sophie moves off to sit in the corner. She looks uncomfortable and wide-eyed and it makes me all the more guilty. She doesn’t need to see all this.

“That is none of your concern! This is my life and affects only me!” My mother snaps back at me, yanking her hand back to her chest in anger. Not so frail now.

of us!” The tears blind me, and I start losing it. Bubbling up inside. I storm away, wrapping my arms around myself and glare out of the window to

my fault.” The same pathetic cringey voice, the same pathetic excuses as she drops

conversations. I can’t hold it in, hold my anger or the heart break. My mother is once again

chaos that you cause … “This …” I gesture across her body and injuries. “Is only the tip of the iceberg, Mother! I won’t let you subject Sophie to more of the same crap.” I can’t say anything

bus home later, giving her extra money so. I don’t have to stay and endure this. I have no reason to stand another second and blindly storm out heading straight for the

shaking and sobbing. The driver that Jake hired standing dutifully to open my door as I approach, and I get in. I can’t

to come here! I was a fool to think I could handle this. She will never change. She will never see that she’s the one who

as I can’t stay here much longer; she won’t talk to

He will be back in a heartbeat, until the next time when she ends up back here and then? Maybe one day one of them will kill her. Can she not see

bringing rational thought back to my head. PA Emma winning over when faced with too much trauma to cope with. My defense mechanism kicking in and numbing it all away, pushing it down until I am

and focus instead on getting the hell away from this place. I

to see an email from Jake, instantly bringing softness to my face and a lift in

sent you

Me A

it and can’t. I glance at the time of the email and realize he sent it at four in the morning, most likely

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