What the hell? Where did that come from?

“Being closed out.” He has a hint of humor in his eye, but I know he’s being serious, sardonic, and not in a friendly way. I frown at him and go back to my sight-seeing, confused at his manner. Trying hard not to rise to it and inwardly churning up with anxiety.

“What does it take, Emma?” That edgy tone in his voice betrays a bad mood looming up.

Why today?

I curse inwardly. Jake’s negatives moods are the worst thing ever; maybe he’s hungover and obviously still tired. He shifts gear as we round a rather craggy coastal road; his focus on the road, his brows furrowed, and a tightness to his jaw that screams of tension.

“Jake, please … What are you talking about?” I squirm in my seat and adjust my clothes to distract the awkwardness in my pose.

How have I closed him out? He’s seen more of me, knows more of me, than anyone on the planet, does he not see that?

“You’re not even going to mention last night? Is that another conversation over?” he snaps this time and I bristle.

“You didn’t mention it either.” I spit, a little too aggressively. Riled by the up by this attack; it’s like he’s getting his period.

“I was waiting to see if you would.” Eyes cool green and face tense, he’s in difficult and stubborn mode.

Great!

“Why?” I snap, but he just shrugs again.

Oh my god.

he’s being crabby as hell. I don’t want to fight, I want to go back to playful, fun Jake. This is

line.” I plead, trying to make him see sense, trying to stop this fiery conversation and get back to something

square one.” The sarcasm thick in his

that supposed to mean?” I

close, Emma, even a hint of letting go, you snap right back in and shut the door. No conversation. No acknowledgment of it, just wham. Over!” He barks at me, all hope of not fighting out the window and my emotions

I’m not letting myself go? That’s being closed off?”

Why is it always

last night … It’s not the issue … It’s the afterwards, Emma.” His voice is laced with venom, anger seething from every

being stupid, anyone can make a

asshole and ruining

of the side window. I’m thrust forward as he slams on the

What the hell?

swerved us into the side of the road, out of the non-existent traffic. He unbuckles and gets out of the car and stalks off toward the side of the high edged road, overlooking the vast drop off the cliff.

should I do? What the actual hell? Where

been the focus of this version of angry Jake, not like this, not with this kind of rage. I feel sick, unbearably emotional and I reel it

doesn’t try

he

no clue what goes on in his head sometimes as I watch him warily,

wheel, but he doesn’t start the car. “It’s about this eternal need in you to stay in full control … Never letting anyone in, never letting yourself

enjoy things in my life, he has no idea. He’s the closest person to

seen just about every version of you there is … Tired, grumpy, bossy, happy, PMSing like fuck.” He’s calmer, but his voice is still strained, that edge to his tone. I sit stiffly, focused on his hands gripping and un-gripping the wheel as he talks. His body language speaking volumes about his

and I spin away, hating that he’s even seen it

need anyone … But it’s not who you are … And it’s not true.” It’s almost

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