The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO)

Chapter 86

Oh my god. Why would anyone want to cheat on him? I mean look at him. Why would she want to hurt him?

I shake my head as if I can’t believe it. I don’t want her to be the one.

Is she the reason he’s the way he is? Why he keeps women at arm’s length, and it’s just sex and fun? Did having his first love savagely rip his heart open make him unable to trust women in his life? Keeping them all at a distance, the way I do with everyone else.

“Why did you start seeing her again?” It’s out before I can stop it.

Do I want to hear him tell me how he’s never got over her? No, I don’t.

He shrugs and gazes at me intensely.

“It’s complicated.”

When is it ever not?

“Stop saying that,” I wail, instantly on my feet and I’m angry.

Why?

Because he’s my Jake. Not hers. I want him to want me, and only me; I know it’s never going to be that way and it ruins every part of me. Rages and burns that once, long ago she had exactly that and she threw it all away. She was a complete idiot!

“Emma … What do you want me to say?” he moves to me, and pushes me back to sit down, so he’s standing over me.

“You think I planned any of this shit?” he looks broken, eyes damp and face unreadable, yet somehow sad.

“Do you love her?” I ask of him, complete fear gripping me inside and I almost sob it out in desperation.

cry … Please don’t cry. Not here. Not now. Not

it. I’m scared of his

don’t want to know.” He grasps

not what you think,” he pleads, his body trying to cage me in against

What do I think? … What could be worse than

… I just need to go.” I shove him away, lost in teen Emma mode and rejecting contact, while my heart is

she’s pregnant with his baby. She’s the first love of his life. She’s the reason he avoids relationships. What am I supposed

I gulp down tears and panic, and finally throw his hands off me. He lets me go and moves back rejected, he’s letting

can’t stay here, so I go into automatic pilot. I stalk toward the door, pulling up

* * *

I may actually die this time. If my lungs don’t self-implode, I think my heart might. The pain is unbearable and raw, and I’ve never willingly exposed myself to enduring

may even throw up; this isn’t my life … My life is calm and easy and straightforward. My job, my apartment, my responsibilities. They all slot into place and I manage them all well. This isn’t really happening. I’m in a parallel universe, or I’m dreaming. I’ll wake at any minute and this will all have been one long, bad dream. Except I know that it’s not. Meeting Jake has slowly changed it all, he is too potent to be around, changing me,

this how we got

* * *

calm, and my tears have dried on their own, my face tight and swollen, but I don’t care anymore. I’ve been through so many emotions these past weeks; I think I’m slowly losing my mind. I’m definitely losing the grip on my control. I don’t even

clock ticking loudly in the modern suite. There’s a light under Jake’s bedroom door. It

desolate, alone on

that what this is all really about? Except I know this isn’t all on him … I’m incapable of letting him get close to me, even if he actually wanted to try. I’m afraid of what that means, what that will feel like; too much has happened. Even if he told me he wanted me and only me, then how would that work? I don’t see how this could get any better, it’s better if we

Can he? Can

have to if I want to keep my job, and I do. I love working with him, I love being his right hand, but surely that in itself is

love him. – I think I already knew that

center of the bed, beside mine. I guess he tried to call me and found mine left behind. He flits his gaze from the screen, up to me and closes it silently, without breaking eye contact. He looks every bit like the CEO he was the first time I ever met him. Mature and poised. In control. It makes

from deep within and makes a quick exit via the door. I swallow and take a deep

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