The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO)

I’m completely numb when I finally say goodbye to Rosalie. I’ve packed my personal things and she’s having anything else taken to my new office in Carrero Tower later today. HQ across town. No excuse to ever come this way again.

Jake stayed in his office the whole time I packed up, and no matter how many times I stared at that door, willing him to come to me and beg me stay, he did not. My heart’s broken into a million pieces, I’m amazed that it hasn’t killed me, that is still beats, that I’m still upright yet I’ve nothing left to live for.

I manage to leave via the stairs. I don’t want people to see my scrubbed clean, raw face, and puffy eyes. My hair hides most of it as I walk from the building with my box file, containing everything that is personal to me, everything that connected me to him, even his dumb novelty souvenirs from our many trips.

“Miss. Anderson?” I’m startled out of my sorrowful reverie by Jefferson, Jake’s driver.

“Yes?” I ask quietly, I must look nothing like my normal self, but he smiles at me gently, a hint of sympathy in his wrinkled gray eyes. He’s been there so many times with Jake and I, yet I barely know the man. Rarely acknowledged him. The elderly looking man with a warm face and impeccable manners. This will be the last I will see of him too. So monumental.

“Mr. Carrero told me I was to wait for you and take you home, Miss.” He leans forward relieving me of my box. I haven’t got the energy to argue, so I allow myself to be ushered into the back of the SUV and driven home. Back to Queens, back to the emptiness of my own room and own bed. A Jake-less life and an endless empty future.

Sarah isn’t home when I open the door to the apartment. I don’t even care, I don’t want to see anyone. I dump my belongings on the kitchen bunker and set about taking off every piece of PA Emma that is upon me. Hating her, loathing her. An anger building from some deep place that takes over and I turn to hysterical clawing to decloak my nemesis.

I hurl my shoes across the floor in rage, I rip off my jacket and skirt, and throw them down the hall dramatically, kicking them away. I strip piece by piece, every clothing item, every jewelry item, stockings and lingerie, panting, wild with exertion and stand naked in my own living room, bawling my heart out. Wanting to rid myself of every cold, controlled ice maiden piece of me that attributed to losing the only man I have ever wanted. I want to scream and rip my own hair out one root at a time.

I reach for a throw on the couch and wrap it around me, trying so hard to bring back the memory of being in his embrace. I feel like I’m dying, the pain is so acute, so overwhelming, all I can do is crumple onto the couch and let it overtake me.

I’m making up for a lifetime of bottled up tears and emotions, a lifetime of pain and rejection. Heartache. Abuse. Neglect. Jake cut through all of it and found a beating heart somewhere in the darkest depths of me. He kept trying to bring it to the light and I fought every step of the way.

Look where it got me. Alone and broken and losing the only man I was ever capable of trusting, ever capable of loving.

I am no longer a thorn in his side, a constant distraction

It struck me like a knife to the gut

I slowly poisoned him in some way,

own a pair. I climb on the bed, moving aside the huge bear Jake won for me at a street carnival on one of our trips.

I should have at least tried to tell him how I felt. Maybe if I had, then I wouldn’t be here now, crying into a plushie’s fluffy belly;

I love you, Jake? – Why not, it’s true! What if he doesn’t feel the

I kidding? He sent me away … He doesn’t feel the

open up, every kiss, and having sex with me. I let myself wonder if it was all ever about

I just been something

told me everything about his life. Our bond was real … Our friendship. He’d been affectionate and attentive while no one else cared for me and looked after me the way he did. I refuse to

of songs we sent one another over the past few months, the jokes, the apologies, the hidden meanings, trying to see the truth behind it all … I stop on a song, pausing my inner anguish with that of confusion as my

Skylar Grey—“I Know You”.

wonder when he sent

iPad for me when we were bored or on a flight. He would sit and leave me songs in humor, or just because… he cared. Because he

That he knows I put myself through so much pain, because of my past; begging me to just stop pushing him away. The lyrics cause my soul to ache and a new flood of tears breaks silently down my

hadn’t I listened to this before? Why now when it’s too late?

a dozen times when we were apart, I need to send it to him now. It says

he put that song on there for me to find, maybe he thought I already had and just never

that hurt him? Been part of the reason he has

to stop me. Before I can talk myself out of