“Nicholas.”

I was dreaming. I must have been close to waking up to be so lucid.

I stood in my old room at the Academy. Nicholas had his back to me, his hand on the door handle. A

familiar curl of dread was growing in my stomach. A dull, physical ache rested behind my ribs.

This was the moment I had broken up with him.

“I’m sorry,” I said.

“Save it.” His voice was rough. I’d hurt him, but he didn’t want to admit it. He wouldn’t let me see.

“Nick, please –”

“Don’t call me that.” He pulled the handle and the door swung open. The light of the hall was blinding.

compared to the dimness of the room.

I had wanted to stop him. I wanted to take back everything, and bring him into my arms again.

But I couldn’t.

the loss of my wolf

I forced myself to relive the

it had that day. I’d hid

done,

cried long into the night, before I pulled myself together, left the

looked back.

and stared at the silk canopy above my borrowed

half–pressed into

there watching her for a long time, as I pressed the memories back into the past where

belonged.

a knock sounded on the door, and the two maids entered. I pulled myself

public appearance. We had to get ready. Everything had to

derfdat

I wouldn’t win the final selection, but I had decided

was already regaining some of the weight I’d lost. My ribs weren’t quite so visible anymore. Each day, I was

as strong as those with wolves, but now I could at least last a full

exhausted.

me dress after my shower. Elva and I had matching light green gowns with faux wildflowers stitched into the skirt. Elva wanted to wear a flower crown to

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