“It wasn’t what it looked like,” I said on reflex

“You said before what you felt for Julian wasn’t serious,” he said.

“It’s not.”

Nicholas crossed his arms. His jaw tightened and he didn’t say anything else.

I didn’t know what else to say, how to ease his worries, than to tell him the truth. “Julian saved me from

you father.”

Nicholas’s enter focus zeroed in on me. All emotion vanished. He looked me over as if looking for injury,

then spoke fiercely, What happened?”

I explained, about the summons, about the threat, and about Julian’s timely intervention. By the end of it, Nicholas had come closer, standing before me again, concern crinkling his brow

“I’m okay now,” I said. “I heard some of your speech. You likely assuaged most of his fears. So you

saved me, too. Thank you.”

wasn’t hard to say those words. I had held onto them for

and Elva. Before I knew

I should have told him the truth sooner, perhaps, but it had taken a long time for me to believe that he would even want to know.

Maybe I could have done something to help.” He

I

knowing the truth, Nicholas. I purposefully kept it from you. I’d thought then

can’t mean

irises with flecks of green,

mattered.

him for his kindness. But facts were facts, and

as it

king someday, Nick”

physical toll saying it now, on me, with my heart aching. On him too, if

little sad.” That is not, nor ever was, me. And if you tied yourself down

trying to

he saw there.

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