Chapter 197

Ella

I pace back and forth outside Gabriel’s chambers, absolutely beside myself over Phil!ppe’s fate. I have the worst feeling that Sinclair is going to fire or demote the guard because of my actions, and I’m already preparing a furious speech to deliver to my mate if he does so. I can’t hear a single word of their conversation because the King’s chambers are soundproofed – a luxury I decide Sinclair and I should definitely invest in when we return home.

The waiting is horrible, but eventually my faithful guard emerges, looking thoroughly dejected. I can’t stop myself from racing up to him with man energy. “Did he demote you? Is he still on the call –I’ll talk to him-“

“Woah,” He catches me by the shoulders. “It’s okay, Ella. He didn’t demote me, he just did a lot of yelling”

“Im so sorry.” I profess wringing my hands.

“Don’t be.” Phil!ppe says evenly, staring me straight in the eye so I can see the honesty in his expression. “You were right. Being someone’s guard is a really intimate relationship. You have to trust me with your very life, with all your secrets

He sighs, shaking his head. “Most people get to choose their guards but you didn’t pick me, you didn’t even know who I was when Dominic a.ssigned me to you.”

“So?” I protest, still feeling indignant on his behalf.

“So it’s right that I should have to prove myself to you.” He chuckles. “Trust has to be earned.”

Phil!ppe pauses, giving me an assessing look. “But I have to tell you that if it had gone on much longer. I don’t think I could’ve kept it up.. part of protecting you means looking out for your health and well-being even when you don’t want me to do it. You weren’t doing well and I’m glad Dominic got through to you. I don’t want to be in that position again.”

to help him understand, or to make myself feel better. I have a terrible sense that it’s the latter, but

in such a whirlwind. My entire

to be a mother, and I have a mate and a pack, and I’m in charge of a world I didn’t know existed, and I’m in the middle of a war, and I might even

watching me closely. He leans back on his heels, pursing his l!ps.

about all the

all realized you’d been left with the humans and that the Goddess was involved, but I think maybe we were so distracted by how amazing it all is that we didn’t consider what it might mean for a woman who probably spent her entire childhood praying that her parents might turn up one day and tell

widen, and suddenly I feel very vulnerable. I wrap my arms around myself. “What orphan doesn’t have

But they left us together so we wouldn’t have to be alone.” I smile at the bittersweet memory. “But we grew up… and we realized that we just weren’t wanted. We weren’t any more special than any of the abandoned kids in

is true. But in my brain finding out

I’ve kept Cora out of it too.. because for the first time since I was eight, I feel like there’s hope I might find the answers…

things that can motivate

therapy is so

on.” I gr0an, thinking of my

“Not you too!”

in self defense, “hey, I’m

arms up. “That’s what they

the sitting room with Leon, Henry, and my

ether trip – a fact the therapist was only too smug about- but for now they’ve

guidance from Leon to travel into the past. As

old, and for the first time

night, but she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. The strange thing is that I find it hard to take in all of her features at once. I can only focus on one aspect at a time, and when I do I

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