The Silent Alpha

***Natalia*** 

Zane leaves to collect his things and Agnes from Nikki and Micah's place, giving me the chance to really think about what I just agreed to.I head to the bathroom to splash cool water on my face and neck, letting out a huge sigh as I wipe the sweat from my brow.

My reflection mocks my pathetic situation, laughing at me for accepting yet another wolf into my life.

‘Don't let him get too close" I remind myself.

' Every kind gesture, every kiss, every gentle caress of my face...it will all be a lie.He doesn't really love me.He doesn't care about me no matter how much he says he does"

Tears spring to my eyes as I think about all the times Christian looked me in the eyes with such false sincerity, professing his undying love for me all the while f*****g my sister behind my back.

Wiping the tears that stain my cheeks, I inspect my reflection, my eyes scrutinizing every imperfection.

Dark circles hug my eyes from my restless night.

Fearful that Zane would find me, I called out of work this morning, keeping Kota home instead of taking him to daycare.

Of course, my attempts proved futile.

The wolf found me without much effort.

‘I am not good enough to fall in love with anyways" I shrug to myself, drying off my face.

‘I couldn't even keep my husband interested in me before he looked elsewhere...Perhaps Zane will also find me inadequate as a mate and move on as well.." I nod at my reflection reassuringly.

‘Yes.Sooner or later, he'll stop liking me and I'll be free"

Having given myself the pep talk of the century, I hurry to find little Kota playing in the backyard and call him to me.He happily waddles over to me with a grin on his face.

"Where's Zane, mommy?" he asks, looking behind me into the living room.

"Can he come play with me?"

I crouch down and lift him into my arms, carrying him over to the living room and sitting him down on the sofa.I smooth down his hair and cup his chubby cheeks in my hands.

"Kota," I say, forcing a smile for him.

"What do you think about Zane staying with us … just for a little bit?"

His eyes widen with joy.

"Yeah!" He cries, jumping up on his feet and clapping his hands.

"Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!"

"You like that idea?" I ask, raising an eyebrow at him.

Kota jumps onto the couch and bursts into laughter.

"Yeah," he giggles, resting his chin in his hands.

"And what about Agnes? Can she stay here too?" I ask.

Kota bounces on his toes, shooting his fingers up in a happy I pout at him.

"I thought I made the best cookies..."

"No," he grins, shaking his head and jumping up like a rabbit.

I feign hurt at his honesty and he rushes up to kiss me square on the lips.

"But Mommy makes the best pancakes!" He chirps.

Kota suddenly stretches out his arms like a plane and flies over to his toy chest, pulling out his favorite toy train and action figures.

"What are you doing?" I ask as he makes a small pile of toys.

"To play with Zane," he shrugs as if that were the most obvious answer.

Worry fills my heart as I realize that Kota would be affected by Zane’s imminent departure.

I would need to do everything in my power to make sure Zane rejects me quickly and leaves us both in one piece.

"Remember, Kota," I sigh, crawling over to him.

"He’s only here for a little while.He won’t be here forever.Entiendes? understand ?"I ask.

He nods and continues to make a pile of toys for Zane when he arrives.

Seeing no point in explaining any further, I rush off to the guest room and ensure it’s comfortable for Agnes, changing the sheets and myself to share my space with a man.

out two drawers for Zane and make room in the closet

my belly as I stare at the Queen sized bed I was expected to share

to fit us both

touching me

leave me be and not punish me so! I readjust the pillows and an

until the sun begins to set in the horizon and a small part of me hopes perhaps Zane had changed his

my mind, the doorbell rings, my heart sinking

over to the door, taking a deep breath

smile politely at me, Nikki and Micah waiting just

swallow hard, hoping my saliva will soothe my dry throat, stepping off to

with what I assume are their

up to the man with his

"You’re here!"

flip at the sight of my son running into Zane’s arms so freely

Kota over.Would I

Be strong.I have to be

"Sorry we’re late,"

we’d take her to town to go shopping for

room while Micah and Niki begin unloading the shopping bags in

we reach the room, I turn to Zane and have him

your

bathroom is down the hall to the left," I say, pointing down the

to hate her.She was not

eyes widening as

to Zane and he smiles back at her, nodding

comfortable it is, her hand feeling the soft fabric of the quilt I put

to hug me, my body stiffening It was just a simple room with a large window looking into the garden and a comfortable

do, I wrap my arms around Agnes and

stares curiously at us, leaning his

crying?"

an explanation but he remains silent as ever, only patting Kota’s back

away, her cheeks flushed pink in

to the room and begins

say curtly, gesturing to Zane and turning to leave Agnes

Kota down and follows close behind me, Kota running down

force my thoughts elsewhere as I

I mutter

at my room and

some space in the closet for you to hang your things,"

arrangement, I go

sleeping over there," I smirk,

stares at me completely dumbfounded

"What?" I shrug indifferently.

‘bedroom’ It did not specify that

I can only assume is annoyance and nods solemnly, knowing he could not force me to

small adjustment but it could not

wolf, a stranger no less, but I could not stomach the

his entire

the way, I will leave you to unpack," I say, stepping around

Micah in the living room, Kota inspecting the tattoos in Micah’s arms with

He chirps as

his

at Micah's tattoos

cool," I say, forcing a

okay?" Nikki asks as she comes in with

of last night and the possibility that my friends were not who I thought they

..." I gulp, looking over at Kota who

I ask, clasping and unclasping

exchange glances before Niki sighs a

know he's your

at the fact that I had

infecting every aspect of my life like a

you upset with us?" Niki asks, a worried look on

you or Kota any harm," she adds quickly, as if to clarify that they were not the

of hurting you or Kota." I almost scoff at her

I won't hurt

sank their teeth into your

not mad at you," I

can't change what you are.Besides, what's done is done." Niki shifts nervously on her feet and I ask a question

any packs nearby?" I ask, my heart in my

me.I would need to

shakes his

are the only wolves in Poulsbo.Nikki and I are rogues just like Zane

pry, wanting to know