The Silent Alpha

Chapter 58: The Black Book Part II

***Derek*** 

Vanessa looks very relaxed and at ease as she sips her coffee and scrolls through her phone nonchalantly, completely oblivious that I am watching her.I haven’t seen her this relaxed since she first arrived at Silver Crest.

Her big green eyes shaded by thick lashes and the long brown hair framing her slightly round face give her an almost angelic look as she studies her phone.

I never noticed how innocent her features make her look.

She truly is beautiful, my wolf, Casper murmurs.

Beautiful...but off limits, Isigh, preparing to ruin her day.I’ve been tracking her now for several days, Vanessa spending most of that time holed up in a motel room.

She wasn't hard to find since she used my credit cards for food and shelter, and while I could have easily cut her funds off, I did not have the heart to freeze my accounts.

Many times I wanted to storm into her room and hold her, but I knew better than to make my presence known to her so As I walk into the small diner by the lake, I notice Vanessa flinch, likely smelling my scent and feeling my presence.

When I approach her table and slide into the seat in front of her, she reluctantly sits up and takes another drink from her coffee before asking if I am here to kill her.I don’t answer her, my eyes lingering on Christian’s mark on her neck.

That should be my mark, Casper snarls, a bit of jealous rage pumping through my veins.

Noticing my stare, Vanessa brushes her hair over her shoulder to hide the mark and takes another drink.

"Do you know why I loved Christian so much?" she asks, settling into a comfortable position and when I don’t respond, she proceeds to answer her own question.

"He was the first person who ever saw me.He made me feel like I mattered and it felt good.It felt good to matter to someone.It felt good to just be enough for someone to take notice of me.I never got that growing up," she sighs through a tired smile.

"I was always just a f**k up with a pretty face.Natalia was the smart one, the successful one.The one who made our parents proud...and I was just there to make the family portraits look good." and it saddens me to think he meant more to her than she meant to him.

Where she appreciated and cherished every moment spent with him, he hardly ever thought of her and those trivial moments in class.

In all honesty, I hardly noticed her either, noting only her pretty face and nothing more.

How broken and deprived of attention must she have been to have fallen for Christian’s half-assed compliments and believed it to be love? She pauses as a waitress comes with a tray of food for her and asks if I want anything.

I shake my head and she dismisses the waitress before staring off at the shore of the lake.

"I was devastated the night Natalia called me to tell me she was getting married to the man I had fallen in love with...And I jumped at the opportunity to get back at her.To make her feel what I felt all those years.Sleeping with Christian...It was like I finally had something to offer.Something Natalia couldn’t give him," she snarls bitterly.

"Did you think Natalia was at fault for all of your misfortunes?" I ask, wanting to know how a sister could be so eager to hurt her own family.

"Did she ever make you feel inferior? Did she deserve your resentment?" silently, her shoulders shaking with every small sob.

I watch her carefully, trying to understand her skewed anger for an innocent person.

As far as I can remember, Natalia was very patient with her sister, doing her best to keep her close and safe, yet even I could tell, neither of them knew each other too well.

Many of their interactions were often a bit awkward or even forced, as if a wall were keeping them apart.

"Natalia was always the favorite," Vanessa finally whispers.

"I didn’t think she needed anything from me...She didn’t need to fight for our parents' love.It was just given to her.Everything was just handed to her, while I-" She fights back her tears and shrugs.

"I couldn’t even get a ‘good job’ or an ‘I’m proud of you’."

"You think she didn’t have any challenges?" I ask.

"You think it was easy being Luna for her?"

"I don’t-"

"Alpha Christopher despised her...Several members, myself included, did not think she could do it." I retort.

"Nothing about being Luna was easy for her."

"I thought...I just thought that-"

"You thought what? That your problems would just She nods, wiping away her tears with her sleeve.

"I’m sorry."

"Sorry for what? Natalia or yourself?" I ask, knowing her answer will determine my decision and her fate.

"I-I don’t ....I don’t-"

diner as if in search of

just sorry

finally snaps, slamming a fist on the

screw up who can’t do

table, shielding her face with her arms

"I’m just sorry!"

her guilt for

help Natalia, but I

most recent kill that I alerted the elders and called for

have saved had I only spoken up sooner about his wolf going mad? Knowing Vanessa is not

I do not dare

am worthless..." Vanessa

a mate after what I did.I am not meant to be happy and I am too tired to figure out why...So I ask again, are you here to kill me?" I stare blankly at her, wondering if my love alone would be enough to fix what’s broken

live for at the moment and I’m too much of a coward to do it myself, so if you are, can I ask for a favor?" She asks in a

hold your hand one more time? I just… I just want

only thing she

flat belly, wondering if the

hands shielding her stomach protectively from my

that she is

small smile of hope curls on her lips before a look of absolute

"No..." She whimpers.

Please don’t hurt my baby! I-I promise I won’t come back to Silver Crest! I'll leave for good, I promise.I'll give Christain his divorce.I'll step aside in

looks of concern towards us.I

keeping my voice low as Vanessa cries hysterically and begs for the

swear it’s not Christian’s.It won’t interfere with his plans!"she

I’m begging you!

across the

she melts into my kiss, allowing herself to just be mine for just.When I pull away, I stare deep into the sea of green looking back at me with fear, my own guilt and shame overwhelming my emotions for even considering

mistakes slide, carrying out his orders without question like a good Beta and keeping

Natalia about her sister and her husband's betrayal and I regret not

ordered me to terminate your pregnancy," I whisper, fresh tears spilling onto Vanessa’s

hurt you, I swear," I add with confidence, gently caressing

my

lie but I don’t pry for an

30 miles from Silver Crest,"

haven’t

"But Christian-" assure her.

be safe there until we can figure out other arrangements and I'll be close

"But-"

temporary

in her eyes but, regardless, she

I’m not making a

***Zane*** 

I whisper

"K-Kota and his dr-dreams."

straighter in

says, everyone now interested in

thought of addressing

my train of thought derails as

won't let me

lick my dry lips and gather my thoughts for a moment, expecting Grayson to say a snarky comment, but he says

mutter, keeping my eyes on Talia, who nods

smile giving me the boost of confidence I need to

atta-ta-tack," I add, Kota looking

Ta-Talia get

pup who suddenly becomes very shy and hides his

murmurs gently to

you want to tell us about your

"No!"

already exploring

he had those dreams?"

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