The Silent Alpha

Chapter 58: The Black Book Part II

***Derek*** 

Vanessa looks very relaxed and at ease as she sips her coffee and scrolls through her phone nonchalantly, completely oblivious that I am watching her.I haven’t seen her this relaxed since she first arrived at Silver Crest.

Her big green eyes shaded by thick lashes and the long brown hair framing her slightly round face give her an almost angelic look as she studies her phone.

I never noticed how innocent her features make her look.

She truly is beautiful, my wolf, Casper murmurs.

Beautiful...but off limits, Isigh, preparing to ruin her day.I’ve been tracking her now for several days, Vanessa spending most of that time holed up in a motel room.

She wasn't hard to find since she used my credit cards for food and shelter, and while I could have easily cut her funds off, I did not have the heart to freeze my accounts.

Many times I wanted to storm into her room and hold her, but I knew better than to make my presence known to her so As I walk into the small diner by the lake, I notice Vanessa flinch, likely smelling my scent and feeling my presence.

When I approach her table and slide into the seat in front of her, she reluctantly sits up and takes another drink from her coffee before asking if I am here to kill her.I don’t answer her, my eyes lingering on Christian’s mark on her neck.

That should be my mark, Casper snarls, a bit of jealous rage pumping through my veins.

Noticing my stare, Vanessa brushes her hair over her shoulder to hide the mark and takes another drink.

"Do you know why I loved Christian so much?" she asks, settling into a comfortable position and when I don’t respond, she proceeds to answer her own question.

"He was the first person who ever saw me.He made me feel like I mattered and it felt good.It felt good to matter to someone.It felt good to just be enough for someone to take notice of me.I never got that growing up," she sighs through a tired smile.

"I was always just a f**k up with a pretty face.Natalia was the smart one, the successful one.The one who made our parents proud...and I was just there to make the family portraits look good." and it saddens me to think he meant more to her than she meant to him.

Where she appreciated and cherished every moment spent with him, he hardly ever thought of her and those trivial moments in class.

In all honesty, I hardly noticed her either, noting only her pretty face and nothing more.

How broken and deprived of attention must she have been to have fallen for Christian’s half-assed compliments and believed it to be love? She pauses as a waitress comes with a tray of food for her and asks if I want anything.

I shake my head and she dismisses the waitress before staring off at the shore of the lake.

"I was devastated the night Natalia called me to tell me she was getting married to the man I had fallen in love with...And I jumped at the opportunity to get back at her.To make her feel what I felt all those years.Sleeping with Christian...It was like I finally had something to offer.Something Natalia couldn’t give him," she snarls bitterly.

"Did you think Natalia was at fault for all of your misfortunes?" I ask, wanting to know how a sister could be so eager to hurt her own family.

"Did she ever make you feel inferior? Did she deserve your resentment?" silently, her shoulders shaking with every small sob.

I watch her carefully, trying to understand her skewed anger for an innocent person.

As far as I can remember, Natalia was very patient with her sister, doing her best to keep her close and safe, yet even I could tell, neither of them knew each other too well.

Many of their interactions were often a bit awkward or even forced, as if a wall were keeping them apart.

"Natalia was always the favorite," Vanessa finally whispers.

"I didn’t think she needed anything from me...She didn’t need to fight for our parents' love.It was just given to her.Everything was just handed to her, while I-" She fights back her tears and shrugs.

"I couldn’t even get a ‘good job’ or an ‘I’m proud of you’."

"You think she didn’t have any challenges?" I ask.

"You think it was easy being Luna for her?"

"I don’t-"

"Alpha Christopher despised her...Several members, myself included, did not think she could do it." I retort.

"Nothing about being Luna was easy for her."

"I thought...I just thought that-"

"You thought what? That your problems would just She nods, wiping away her tears with her sleeve.

"I’m sorry."

"Sorry for what? Natalia or yourself?" I ask, knowing her answer will determine my decision and her fate.

"I-I don’t ....I don’t-"

search of the best answer, but only she knows how she

don’t know.I’m just

finally snaps, slamming a fist on

I’m such a screw up who can’t do anything right.I’m sorry you got me for a mate.I’m sorry I

shielding her face with her

"I’m just sorry!"

part of me understands her guilt for I have been living with

stood by and done nothing to help Natalia, but I

that I alerted the elders and called for

wolf going mad? Knowing Vanessa is not the only one who's made but I can’t seem to

but I do

am worthless..." Vanessa

after with a mate after what I did.I am not meant to be happy and I am too tired to figure out why...So I ask again, are you here to kill me?" I stare blankly at her,

much of a coward to do it myself, so if you are, can I ask for a favor?" She

your hand one more time? I just… I

the only thing she has left to

wondering if the pup growing inside her would help her find

her hands shielding her stomach

trails off as she comes to the realization that she is pregnant,

before a look of

"No..." She whimpers.

promise I won’t come back to Silver Crest! I'll leave for good, I promise.I'll give

in the room, several casting looks of concern towards us.I try to calm her down, but the more I attempt to do

cries hysterically and begs for the

swear it’s not Christian’s.It won’t interfere

I’m begging you!

I reach across the table to cup

mine for just.When I pull away, I stare deep into the

orders without question like a

Natalia about her sister and her husband's betrayal and

me to terminate your pregnancy,"

won't do it.I won’t hurt you, I swear," I add with confidence, gently caressing her cheeks and enjoying the sparks

accept my

but I don’t pry for an answer.I don’t care.I’m

30 miles from Silver Crest," I explain

old meeting ground but we haven’t used it in years.You can hide there while I put together

"But Christian-" assure her.

figure out other arrangements and I'll be close enough to

"But-"

just a temporary arrangement,"

is hesitation in her eyes but, regardless,

just hope I’m not making a

***Zane*** 

I whisper

"K-Kota and his dr-dreams."

silent up until now, sits up straighter in his chair, his eyes focusing on

everyone now interested in what I have

fear ripples through me at the thought of addressing so many high ranking

fill my head, reminding as though it is full of cotton and my train of thought derails as I stare back at the room full of wolves expecting

me that she’s with me and she won't let me fall.She inhales deeply and I breathe with her, slowly letting the air out of my lungs in a long

for a moment, expecting Grayson to say a snarky comment, but he says

dr-dream...i-it came tr-true," I mutter, keeping my

good," she mouths, her gentle smile giving me the

atta-ta-tack," I add, Kota looking

saw Ta-Talia get

small pup who suddenly becomes very shy and hides

murmurs gently to the

to tell us

"No!"

answer but I can see she is already exploring his small mind, combing through his memories as well as Talia’s to piece

long has he had those dreams?" Toran

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