The Temptation of Sin And The Lycan Princess

17. My Demons

SKYLA.

As the door shuts behind him, my small smirk fades away, and I look around the cottage. That cosy touch feels empty… My stomach drops, guilt filling me, followed by a void, one so deep it almost hurts to

breathe. This is the part I hate the most; I know my flaws… I know when I’m fucking up but it doesn’t stop me from self- sabotaging everything. Even then, it’s easier to identify my flaws and another thing entirely trying to move away from them. 1

Breaking a cycle that, for a fleeting moment, fills that emptiness, is hard. I live in those moments… It offers me temporary relief, a distraction I really need from the constant war that wages in my mind. But it always comes to an end and then it all sinks in, knowing I fucked up. But deep down I know I’ll do it all over again, because I need that,

those small moments of reprieve they offer

4

Picking up my phone, I unlock it and click on the chat app. It’s instinctual, another bad habit of mine that I’ve picked up recently. It

has become a part of my routine… One I

always knew would probably end in disappointment, yet still, I check my

messages anyway.

Still nothing.

Sighing heavily, I stare unseeingly at the

screen.

I can still feel his touch on my body, and I

don’t know how to feel about it. In the

moment everything feels good, but then… now, I feel hollow. Moving toward the front door, I can still smell his scent clinging to me, to this place…. 1

Locking the door, I sigh, resting my forehead against the wood before I slowly

turn and head to the bedroom. A place that

still smells of him and sex… It’s like I can’t

escape him, escape what I did. I messed up and once Royce finds out…

I sigh heavily, feeling sick with guilt and I

turn away, shutting the door, hoping hist scent won’t linger too long.

“Meow?”

Malevolent’s whine draws my attention to

her, and I smile softly as I crouch down and

scoop her into my arms. “Come on, little

one.” I whisper, nuzzling my nose into her

neck. She’s my forever one.

Nothing helps, nothing ever helps.

Royce’s words fill my mind. ‘You’re worth

more than a one-night hook-up…’ Why do

sting so much

head; he

be able to go back

head to the

Malevolent to

at the ceiling, and watch

reflect. I’m in the dark, and the curtains are

did I do

casual hook-ups aren’t

a teacher at the school? Usually, I am not that foolish, nothing good will come of

was getting to me… Yeah, I’m not making sense. Was I trying

I know it makes me a bitch, but if I couldn’t have Royce, then

for his brother.

Nicely played Sky…

me. If Royce finds out, I bet he’ll be disgusted that I

the other so easily…

Nice work.

my side, I run my

my hair, breathing deeply,

than to hurt

the guilt and hollowness seeping

I always be

People think I’m

because I’m tough and I’ll

everything I have… but no one sees the fucked

flex my fingers, trying to rid the horrid

void so big

it and

where you want

both threatening to take

to wreak havoc and

me, or even… destroy

to feel something other

Even if I agreed to a casual thing, I can’t let it happen again even if he was pretty good in bed or if he gave me an incredible orgasm… I can’t… not with him. It’s

it is momentary… deep down, I know I’ll fuck up again.

at

feel sick, feeling as if I’m betraying him, but he’s the one refusing to talk to me… but does it even matter? It’s not like we are

couple-

His ex. Fuck!

and I wonder if

together again.

I

doesn’t mean he needed to

with me… and stop

You’re overthinking Sky, chill.

and frustration

Fuck calm down…

away when I lose control. My heart thunders and right now, I can’t lose control. I hate how I have empty blanks in my memory whenever I completely spiral. What if I do

run to the bedroom. Pulling open my top chest drawer, I scramble around, dropping my phone in the process; it hits the floor, but I don’t care. I can

shaking hands and bite off the lid, my eyes blazing, my aura raging around me so

put on me to mask my

growl as my Lycan tries

but I win and gulp it down. Pain. rips through me and I scream in agony as it cripples me, making me fall to my knees. The poison bleeding through me, setting

within me. 4

my head will

splinter the wood but

forward, my