The Temptation of Sin And The Lycan Princess

17. My Demons

SKYLA.

As the door shuts behind him, my small smirk fades away, and I look around the cottage. That cosy touch feels empty… My stomach drops, guilt filling me, followed by a void, one so deep it almost hurts to

breathe. This is the part I hate the most; I know my flaws… I know when I’m fucking up but it doesn’t stop me from self- sabotaging everything. Even then, it’s easier to identify my flaws and another thing entirely trying to move away from them. 1

Breaking a cycle that, for a fleeting moment, fills that emptiness, is hard. I live in those moments… It offers me temporary relief, a distraction I really need from the constant war that wages in my mind. But it always comes to an end and then it all sinks in, knowing I fucked up. But deep down I know I’ll do it all over again, because I need that,

those small moments of reprieve they offer

4

Picking up my phone, I unlock it and click on the chat app. It’s instinctual, another bad habit of mine that I’ve picked up recently. It

has become a part of my routine… One I

always knew would probably end in disappointment, yet still, I check my

messages anyway.

Still nothing.

Sighing heavily, I stare unseeingly at the

screen.

I can still feel his touch on my body, and I

don’t know how to feel about it. In the

moment everything feels good, but then… now, I feel hollow. Moving toward the front door, I can still smell his scent clinging to me, to this place…. 1

Locking the door, I sigh, resting my forehead against the wood before I slowly

turn and head to the bedroom. A place that

still smells of him and sex… It’s like I can’t

escape him, escape what I did. I messed up and once Royce finds out…

I sigh heavily, feeling sick with guilt and I

turn away, shutting the door, hoping hist scent won’t linger too long.

“Meow?”

Malevolent’s whine draws my attention to

her, and I smile softly as I crouch down and

scoop her into my arms. “Come on, little

one.” I whisper, nuzzling my nose into her

neck. She’s my forever one.

Nothing helps, nothing ever helps.

Royce’s words fill my mind. ‘You’re worth

more than a one-night hook-up…’ Why do

words sting so

my head; he just

won’t be able to go back

head to the

cradling Malevolent to my chest.

ceiling, and watch the shadowy patterns

reflect. I’m in the dark, and the curtains are open, but I

I do

casual hook-ups

at the school?

his refusal was getting to me… Yeah, I’m not making sense. Was I trying

me a bitch, but if I couldn’t

for his brother.

Nicely played Sky…

I bet he’ll be disgusted that I bounced

to the other so

Nice work.

my side, I run

hair, breathing deeply,

more than to hurt

to scream, and cry, the guilt and hollowness seeping deeper inside

I always

think I’m a

because I’m tough and I’ll jump

everything I have… but no one sees the fucked up shit inside my

I flex my fingers, trying to rid

void so

into it and never

you want to

cry, both threatening

wreak havoc and destroy

or even…

want to feel something other than empty,

to a casual thing, I can’t let it happen again even if he was pretty good in bed or if he gave me an incredible orgasm… I can’t… not

know I’ll

at my phone.

I’m betraying him, but he’s the one refusing to talk to me… but does it even matter? It’s not like

couple-

His ex. Fuck!

upright, my heart thundering, and I wonder if something happened and

together again.

hurts, but I should be happy

doesn’t mean he needed to cut

and

You’re overthinking Sky, chill.

feel my anger and frustration rising, and

Fuck calm down…

heart thunders and right now, I can’t lose control. I

my phone in the process; it hits the floor, but I don’t care. I can feel myself

grab one of the vials of serum with shaking hands and bite off the lid, my eyes blazing, my aura raging around me

on me to mask my aura, are not enough right

my Lycan tries to stop

and gulp it down. Pain. rips through me and I scream in agony as it cripples me, making me fall to my knees.

within me. 4

will burst as I grab onto the chest of drawers,

the wood but I can’t

tumble forward, my head hits