The Temptation of Sin And The Lycan Princess

17. My Demons

SKYLA.

As the door shuts behind him, my small smirk fades away, and I look around the cottage. That cosy touch feels empty… My stomach drops, guilt filling me, followed by a void, one so deep it almost hurts to

breathe. This is the part I hate the most; I know my flaws… I know when I’m fucking up but it doesn’t stop me from self- sabotaging everything. Even then, it’s easier to identify my flaws and another thing entirely trying to move away from them. 1

Breaking a cycle that, for a fleeting moment, fills that emptiness, is hard. I live in those moments… It offers me temporary relief, a distraction I really need from the constant war that wages in my mind. But it always comes to an end and then it all sinks in, knowing I fucked up. But deep down I know I’ll do it all over again, because I need that,

those small moments of reprieve they offer

4

Picking up my phone, I unlock it and click on the chat app. It’s instinctual, another bad habit of mine that I’ve picked up recently. It

has become a part of my routine… One I

always knew would probably end in disappointment, yet still, I check my

messages anyway.

Still nothing.

Sighing heavily, I stare unseeingly at the

screen.

I can still feel his touch on my body, and I

don’t know how to feel about it. In the

moment everything feels good, but then… now, I feel hollow. Moving toward the front door, I can still smell his scent clinging to me, to this place…. 1

Locking the door, I sigh, resting my forehead against the wood before I slowly

turn and head to the bedroom. A place that

still smells of him and sex… It’s like I can’t

escape him, escape what I did. I messed up and once Royce finds out…

I sigh heavily, feeling sick with guilt and I

turn away, shutting the door, hoping hist scent won’t linger too long.

“Meow?”

Malevolent’s whine draws my attention to

her, and I smile softly as I crouch down and

scoop her into my arms. “Come on, little

one.” I whisper, nuzzling my nose into her

neck. She’s my forever one.

Nothing helps, nothing ever helps.

Royce’s words fill my mind. ‘You’re worth

more than a one-night hook-up…’ Why do

words sting so much

head; he just

I won’t be able to go

head to the lounge and

sofa, cradling Malevolent to my

ceiling, and watch the shadowy patterns of

reflect. I’m in the dark, and the curtains are open, but I have no energy to get

did I

casual hook-ups

know and is a teacher at the school? Usually, I

know I wanted Royce, and his refusal was getting to me… Yeah, I’m not making sense. Was I

me a bitch,

for his brother.

Nicely played Sky…

finds out, I bet he’ll be disgusted that I bounced

the other

Nice work.

onto my side, I run

hair, breathing

than

I want to scream, and cry, the guilt

I

think I’m a

because I’m tough and I’ll

one sees the fucked

I flex my fingers, trying to rid

and creating a void so big I

and never

state where you want

threatening

havoc

or even…

want to feel something other than empty, angry or

happen again even

it is momentary… deep down, I know I’ll

stare at my phone.

sick, feeling as if I’m betraying him, but he’s the one refusing to talk to me… but does it even matter? It’s not like

couple-

His ex. Fuck!

upright, my heart thundering, and I wonder if something happened

together again.

but I should be

he needed to

with me… and stop talking

You’re overthinking Sky, chill.

feel my anger and frustration rising, and my

Fuck calm down…

lose control. My heart thunders and right now, I can’t lose control. I hate how I have empty blanks in my memory whenever I completely spiral. What if I do something I

phone in the process; it

and bite off the lid, my eyes blazing, my aura raging around me so powerfully that even the spells Delsanra and Raihana,

put on me to mask my aura, are not enough right

Lycan

I win and gulp it down. Pain. rips through me and I scream in agony as it cripples me, making me fall to my knees. The poison bleeding through me, setting my blood on fire, as it eats away at

within me. 4

my head will burst as I grab onto the chest of

the wood but I can’t

forward, my head