Blackmailed For Love

Hi, my name is Anna.

Because my Mama thought it would be cool to name me that because her name was Elsa.

But unlike Mama, I did not have golden, sun-like hair, nor her blue eyes.

My eyes were grey, Mama said that they reflect light and change from bright to dark- I didn't know the difference though, and my hair was as black as a dark night.

Mama said that they were beautiful but sometimes I wish I had her hair.

1 Because I got my hair and eyes from my father.

And it was a subject that my mother rarely talked about or when she did, only when I would insist on it, she would get sad.

You must be wondering, how did I know so much when I was just a five year old, right? Well… I was soon to be six years old, if that helps.

But let me tell you a secret, I was really smart even when I was five.

I knew my multiplication tables up to thirty.

I could add and subtract without using the pencil and eraser.

I knew pneumonia starts with p.

And I knew my grandfather wasn't a nice man.

I knew Mama was worried about me and Gammy.

I knew Gammy was sick and it wasn't just cold.

Also my father's name was Kristian.

3 I knew it because Mama sometimes dreamed about him.

I knew it because I heard Gammy talk to Mama.

Gammy told Mama to ask for my father's help but Mama didn't want to.

I didn't know why Mama never talks about my father.

Sometimes, I felt angry that she wouldn't tell me anything about him.

Sometimes, I felt sad that she had to be the only one to take care of us.

Sometimes I wanted to ask her that she tell me everything about my father and take me to him.

Sometimes, I was afraid that if I met my father, he would take me away from Mama, just like Mama did me from him.

4 Sometimes, I just didn't want to be this smart.

Mama didn't know, because I took my time writing down my sums even though I already knew the answers.

Sometimes, I just pretended to not be interested in reading and studying.

But they were the only things that made sense, not like how Mama pretended to be happy when she was actually sad.

Right now, Mama was standing behind a tree and a tall man was standing in front of her.

I couldn't see him as he was hidden behind a tree so I walked to the edge of the park and called, "Mama!"

But she didn't hear me.

The tall man suddenly turned around and walked away.

I wondered if he was the one she wanted to be friends with.

Was he the one she went on a dinner with last night? Mama had never gone to dinner with a friend before, and it made me feel really sad for her.

I got excited yesterday when I heard that she was going to dinner and it was the reason I gave her my lucky charm.

I hope it worked.

Mama could really use a friend.

Just like I made new ones today.

I looked back to where the two girls were still playing with the flying disk.

Phoebe and Hanna were nice.

It felt nice to be out here and play with other girls of the same age.

I really enjoyed myself.

It felt normal.

seen such a beautiful park, And it was nice to pretend that everything was normal even though I knew they weren't even

we would get to stay here longer than the other places but I won't complain if Mama

she had her reasons, though she

"Anna?"

Mama and notice her blotchy cheeks and red

She was crying.

"I live here, Elsa.

I own this building."

as he walked away and disappeared out of

the pool and then walked up the stairs to

lone tree standing in

the park behind the small hedge that

hundred times heavy as I walked

"Mama?"

tears and

"Come, angel.

go up

have been here for a

picked her up and she easily wrapped

why are you

She asked.

"I am not, angel."

pressed to my cheek and she

her cheek against mine and said, "You are

say anything else as she hugged me

Mom in the kitchen, making herself a herbal tea that she had always liked but

you know what we

tell her about everything she did

me and let the tears fall once

I was going to

in the same

fûcking owned

should've known, nothing could be ever

not today, then one day in the near future he would

In an elevator.

Outside, in the hallway.

dropped in unannounced just to torment

something I wouldn't be able

me for what I

I hid his daughter, all this

would've to

was no

happened all those

I would try again, I'd ask him

couldn't not

couldn't take my daughter away

no choice! And now when I had one, I was choosing to tell him everything, he

one of the sundresses that filled my closet, I came out into the living room to find my little angel stuffing her face with Oreos

and

found Mom near the windows and came

When you were little, you could always sense when I felt upset and you'd just come

looked out of

the way she

myself, my

her hand on my shoulder and said, "But she has your

She has your chann.

has

of you,

"Don't call me that."

I hated that endearment.

smiles and pretends to be the kid

you, she isn't getting a chance to enjoy her childhood,

to her and met the blues

"I never

She nodded.

"I know.

never wanted

have

isn't like

before letting something happen to his own

tear escaping my

quickly wiped it away and pressed my lips tightly until the sob crawled