Choosing Her Lover

I make a point of arriving at Luigi’s a few minutes early. But I don’t go in, instead buying myself a latte at the coffee bar opposite, and seating myself in the window to watch.

Why am I nervous?

At five to eight, Ben appears around the corner. The rain has cleared, and he wears a plain white shirt, the top couple of buttons undone, and black jeans.

Nice….

He pops his head through the door to glance inside, then returns to wait outside, looking up and down the street.

Something feels unfamiliar about this. Of course, it’s been a while since I last had an actual date….

Yeah…. it’s a date. Not a meet-up for a quick fuck….

My stomach is fluttering, my throat tight as I swallow my coffee.

Don’t be so damn silly. It’s a date. That’s all….

Gulping down the last of my drink, I exit the cafe to cross the street. “Ben….”

“Ah, there you are.” He gives me a peck on the cheek, then, “I reserved a table for us. Shall we….”

Courtesy itself, he opens the door, gesturing me through first. At our table, he pulls out my chair to seat me, offers me the menu. He is a perfect gentleman.

But he never smiles. There’s something about him, a kind of grimness, that’s a little off-putting.

Is he nervous too?

“Got yourself dried out alright?” he asks. “You’re feeling okay? Not going to come down with anything?”

“I’m fine. I had a long soak in a hot bath. It’s going to be a while before it’s pleasant being in the car though. You know what the smell of wet dog is like.”

“Yeah. It’s just the worst, isn’t it?” And he laughs.

And with the laugh, his whole face changes, lighting up. Suddenly, from being a little ordinary, he is a strikingly good-looking man, his features transformed.

Wow!

and I realise that I am

nothing. It’s just that you look very different when you

the first to say that. My mother’s forever on at me to smile more. She

brother? So, there’s more like

his hand back and forth. “No, not really. He was at the head of the

you’re underplaying yourself a bit.

it goes, isn’t it? ’Not bad-looking’. He has women

Of his own

to lighten the mood, crack a joke. “Every maiden’s dream, eh? Perhaps I should

he smiles again, his face transforming once more. “Too late. You’ve missed the boat. He got married recently.” He casts a speculative look over me.

It’s just me. I opted out of

“Why was that?”

was pregnant. It

eyes. “Yes, that would do

“A couple of years.”

been no-one

What should I say?

dating thing. Didn’t want to

brow. “This is

“My first date, yes.”

Change the subject….

no ‘Mrs Ben’

preferred my

would do it

talk about something

“Good idea.”

No hopping into bed on

spaghetti around his fork,

four dogs? That’s a lot. All rescues? They