*****

And afterwards, as we lie together, naked in the half-light, he says, “I have something for you if you will accept it.”

He seems a little uncertain as he produces a small satin bag from a side-drawer, the kind that usually contains jewellery. I open it to find a narrow, black velvet choker, with a dewdrop pearl suspended.

“Will you accept it?” he asks, a trace of anxiety in his voice. “Will you wear it?”

Am I being collared?

I think I am….

I finger it, rolling the pearl in my fingers; so small and delicate a thing, and yet, so laden with significance.

“You understand what you are asking of me?” I say. “When you give me something like this? When you ask me to wear it?”

“Yes, I understand,” he says. “And yes, I am asking that you wear it for me. Will you do that?”

His voice brims with hope and worry; desire and unease. “Am I asking too much of you? Or too quickly?”

The pearl, opalescent with pale, swirling, beautiful colours, sits between my fingers.

Is this too soon?

No, I want this too….

“No, I don’t think you are. It’s just that no-one before has ever wanted me like this….”

“I want you like this. Isn’t that enough?”

Unravelling the velvet, I place it around my neck, fumbling with the catch at the back.

me,” he whispers, reaching behind me to clip it closed. And as it fastens he kisses the

my neck where he has just

me, he lazily stroking me. After a long while,

know I shouldn’t, but I have to ask you this…. Are you still seeing anyone else? I know when we met that you were. And because of the way that we met, I don’t really have the right

but, he wasn’t right and…. I don’t even want to

“The clubs? What clubs?”

and my

used to go to clubs a lot for, er….” I

finally found someone you want

Don’t fuck it up….

Talk to me. What are

clubs. I used to go a lot before I met

me.

God. Have I spoiled

sex clubs, but you don’t anymore? Because

because

“Thank you for telling

You were worrying?

is important enough for you and me to have met in the first place, but that

what you do to me, what we

me to him again and kisses me. The kiss is hard, penetrating

went often? You have friends there? You would like to go again, but

would love to do that, but only if you’re comfortable with it. There’s something about the

“But….?”

realise that you would

What I also realise is that they will see you with me, and know that while they had you for an hour, with me, you have stayed. They

*****

do right now except sit here and

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