Choosing Her Lover

Chapter 22

*****

And afterwards, as we lie together, naked in the half-light, he says, “I have something for you if you will accept it.”

He seems a little uncertain as he produces a small satin bag from a side-drawer, the kind that usually contains jewellery. I open it to find a narrow, black velvet choker, with a dewdrop pearl suspended.

“Will you accept it?” he asks, a trace of anxiety in his voice. “Will you wear it?”

Am I being collared?

I think I am….

I finger it, rolling the pearl in my fingers; so small and delicate a thing, and yet, so laden with significance.

“You understand what you are asking of me?” I say. “When you give me something like this? When you ask me to wear it?”

“Yes, I understand,” he says. “And yes, I am asking that you wear it for me. Will you do that?”

His voice brims with hope and worry; desire and unease. “Am I asking too much of you? Or too quickly?”

The pearl, opalescent with pale, swirling, beautiful colours, sits between my fingers.

Is this too soon?

No, I want this too….

“No, I don’t think you are. It’s just that no-one before has ever wanted me like this….”

“I want you like this. Isn’t that enough?”

Unravelling the velvet, I place it around my neck, fumbling with the catch at the back.

let me,” he whispers, reaching behind me to clip it closed. And as it fastens

the line of my jaw and down to my neck where he has just placed his mark on me,

lie together, entwined, his arms around me, he lazily stroking me. After a long while, he

we met that you were. And because of the way that we met, I don’t really have the right to ask you the

not. Not anymore. There was someone, but, he wasn’t right and…. I don’t even want

“The clubs? What clubs?”

my

er…. I used to go to clubs a lot for,

finally found someone you want to

Don’t fuck it up….

Talk to me. What are these

er, sex clubs. I used to go a

me.

God. Have I spoiled

to go to sex clubs, but you don’t anymore? Because

yes… because

me. “Thank you for telling

You were worrying?

met in the first place, but that perhaps I could

you do to

kiss is hard, penetrating and possessive;

clubs, you went often? You have friends there?

comfortable with it. There’s something about the atmosphere, watching people being good together…. But….”

“But….?”

that you

also realise is that they will see you with me, and know that while they had you for an hour, with me, you have

*****

my seat at in the lobby, with little to do right now except sit

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