Choosing Her Lover

Chapter 22

*****

And afterwards, as we lie together, naked in the half-light, he says, “I have something for you if you will accept it.”

He seems a little uncertain as he produces a small satin bag from a side-drawer, the kind that usually contains jewellery. I open it to find a narrow, black velvet choker, with a dewdrop pearl suspended.

“Will you accept it?” he asks, a trace of anxiety in his voice. “Will you wear it?”

Am I being collared?

I think I am….

I finger it, rolling the pearl in my fingers; so small and delicate a thing, and yet, so laden with significance.

“You understand what you are asking of me?” I say. “When you give me something like this? When you ask me to wear it?”

“Yes, I understand,” he says. “And yes, I am asking that you wear it for me. Will you do that?”

His voice brims with hope and worry; desire and unease. “Am I asking too much of you? Or too quickly?”

The pearl, opalescent with pale, swirling, beautiful colours, sits between my fingers.

Is this too soon?

No, I want this too….

“No, I don’t think you are. It’s just that no-one before has ever wanted me like this….”

“I want you like this. Isn’t that enough?”

Unravelling the velvet, I place it around my neck, fumbling with the catch at the back.

as it fastens he kisses the soft skin at the nape of my neck. “Thank you,

my neck where he has just placed his

he lazily

have to ask you this…. Are you still seeing anyone else? I know when we met that you

not. Not anymore. There was someone, but, he wasn’t right and…. I don’t even want to now. I used to go to the clubs a lot,

“The clubs? What clubs?”

and my big

clubs a lot for, er….”

finally found someone you want to

Don’t fuck it up….

Talk to me. What are

sex clubs. I used to go

me. My stomach

Have I

used to go to sex clubs, but you don’t anymore? Because of

yes… because of

telling

You were worrying?

for you and me to have met in

‘enough for me’. I love what you do to me, what we do together. You have me thinking of you all

The kiss is hard, penetrating and possessive; and it sets my heart pounding again. Then he

often? You have friends there? You would like to go

do that, but only if you’re comfortable with it. There’s something about the atmosphere, watching people being good together…. But….” and my words

“But….?”

realise that you

will see you with me, and know that while they

*****

right now except sit here and look alert, I gaze out of the panoramic

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