Choosing Her Lover

Chapter 22

*****

And afterwards, as we lie together, naked in the half-light, he says, “I have something for you if you will accept it.”

He seems a little uncertain as he produces a small satin bag from a side-drawer, the kind that usually contains jewellery. I open it to find a narrow, black velvet choker, with a dewdrop pearl suspended.

“Will you accept it?” he asks, a trace of anxiety in his voice. “Will you wear it?”

Am I being collared?

I think I am….

I finger it, rolling the pearl in my fingers; so small and delicate a thing, and yet, so laden with significance.

“You understand what you are asking of me?” I say. “When you give me something like this? When you ask me to wear it?”

“Yes, I understand,” he says. “And yes, I am asking that you wear it for me. Will you do that?”

His voice brims with hope and worry; desire and unease. “Am I asking too much of you? Or too quickly?”

The pearl, opalescent with pale, swirling, beautiful colours, sits between my fingers.

Is this too soon?

No, I want this too….

“No, I don’t think you are. It’s just that no-one before has ever wanted me like this….”

“I want you like this. Isn’t that enough?”

Unravelling the velvet, I place it around my neck, fumbling with the catch at the back.

let me,” he whispers, reaching behind me to clip it closed. And as it fastens he kisses

cheek, the line of my jaw and down to my neck where

around me, he lazily stroking me.

this…. Are you still seeing anyone else? I know when we met that you were.

Not anymore. There was someone, but, he wasn’t right and…. I don’t even want to now. I used to go to the clubs a lot, but now I simply want

“The clubs? What clubs?”

my big

clubs a lot for,

finally found someone you want to be

Don’t fuck it up….

Talk to me. What are these

clubs. I used to go a lot before I met

stares at me. My stomach

Have

smiles. “You used to go to sex clubs, but you don’t anymore?

yes… because

you for telling

You were worrying?

enough for you and me to have met in the first place, but that

heart skips a beat. “Ryan, you are ‘enough for me’. I love what you do

and kisses me. The kiss is hard, penetrating and possessive; and it sets

clubs, you went often? You have friends there? You would like to go again, but

love to do that, but only if you’re comfortable with it. There’s something about the atmosphere, watching people being good together…. But….” and

“But….?”

realise that you would be

had sex with? Yes, I realise that. What I also realise is that they will see you with

*****

now except sit here and look

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