Choosing Her Lover

Chapter 22

*****

And afterwards, as we lie together, naked in the half-light, he says, “I have something for you if you will accept it.”

He seems a little uncertain as he produces a small satin bag from a side-drawer, the kind that usually contains jewellery. I open it to find a narrow, black velvet choker, with a dewdrop pearl suspended.

“Will you accept it?” he asks, a trace of anxiety in his voice. “Will you wear it?”

Am I being collared?

I think I am….

I finger it, rolling the pearl in my fingers; so small and delicate a thing, and yet, so laden with significance.

“You understand what you are asking of me?” I say. “When you give me something like this? When you ask me to wear it?”

“Yes, I understand,” he says. “And yes, I am asking that you wear it for me. Will you do that?”

His voice brims with hope and worry; desire and unease. “Am I asking too much of you? Or too quickly?”

The pearl, opalescent with pale, swirling, beautiful colours, sits between my fingers.

Is this too soon?

No, I want this too….

“No, I don’t think you are. It’s just that no-one before has ever wanted me like this….”

“I want you like this. Isn’t that enough?”

Unravelling the velvet, I place it around my neck, fumbling with the catch at the back.

behind me to clip it closed. And as it fastens he

my jaw and down to my neck where he has just placed his mark on me,

lie together, entwined, his arms around me, he lazily stroking me. After

you this…. Are you still seeing anyone else? I know when we met that you were. And because of the way that we met, I don’t really have the right to ask you the

I’m not. Not anymore. There was someone, but, he wasn’t right and…. I don’t even want to now. I used to go to the

“The clubs? What clubs?”

my

to go to clubs a lot for, er….” I chew my

found someone you want to

Don’t fuck it up….

me. What are

clubs. I used to go a

at me. My

God. Have I

to sex clubs, but you

because

me. “Thank you for telling

You were worrying?

have met in the first place, but that perhaps I could not…. be enough….

love what you do to me, what we do together.

him again and kisses me. The kiss is hard, penetrating and possessive; and it sets

often? You have friends there? You would like

to do that, but only if you’re comfortable with it. There’s something

“But….?”

that

“…. I would be meeting men you have had sex with? Yes, I realise that. What I also realise is that they will see you with me, and know that while they had you for

*****

in the lobby, with little to do right now except sit here and look alert, I gaze out of the panoramic front

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