Chapter 0500

Emma

I walk into Mia's office for yet another therapy session. Just like we always do, I first take off my shoes before sitting down.

"Hi Emma," Mia asks, smiling at me. Her smile, just like always, is inviting and warm. It makes you calm and relaxed.

"Hi Mia"

"Okay, you know what we have to do first, right?"

She asks and I nod my head.

I take a deep breath before closing my eyes. I sort through my thoughts. I don't hold onto them for long or dwell on them. Instead, I let them go without trying to dive into them.

I push out the thoughts about Calvin, Gunner, my brother, mom and Ava. I clear my head until there is nothing. Until my head is empty and I am at peace.

Once that's done, I open my eyes.

"Are you ready for us to begin?" Mia, who was watching me, asks.

I nod "Yes."

the last time, you told me you are ready to get your life back

her question bounce in my head as I

have a

two years since I had a mental breakdown because of guilt and out of nowhere, I quit my job. I never expected that they'd take me back,

I expected them to turn me away and tell me to fuck off. I was surprised when my senior got excited at hearing me. She immediately accepted my request, even after I told her that I wasn't coming back to the city I'd called home for

your life back?" Her

to think about it. Gunner is the reason I am doing all

"What about him?"

a good mother to him when my life is a mess now, can I?" I give her a sheepish smile. "I quit my job and moved with my mum while I was basically wasting away in

then writes something in her note

and Calvin as a bandaid. I am afraid that you are settling for them

would think this way about me and about my intentions to mend things with

just stare at her. No words come out of my mouth. It opens and closes, but nothing. I lack the words to express what I feel at the

may be too young to understand everything but if that's what I am thinking, then that's what Calvin will think too. Are you sure that you haven't settled for them because the

Ava are friends so he knows that she and Rowan are together. He knows Rowan chose Ava. What's to stop him from thinking that the reason I am now begging for forgiveness is because Rowan didn't want me? I've was hang up

because I genuinely want forgiveness and a chance at redemption. I want to be

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