Forever in the Past and Forever in the Future

Forever in the Past and Forever in the Future by Neener Chapter 4

The next month and a half are the worst of my life. Thank Goddess for Lex. She keeps me going. Any motivation I ever had is gone now. Instead of just

breakfast and dinner, now I make lunch too and I’m still on pantry duty. Every moment of my day is filled with work from the time I wake up until the time I crash in my bed. Lex convinces me to enjoy the time that she and I get to spend together, which is when I’m cooking meals.

I find I actually do enjoy cooking while Lex is with me. No one comes to bother me, so we get to have great conversations without interruptions. In the end, I have created something people will enjoy. I even found a couple of recipe books in the back of one of the kitchen cupboards and taught myself some new techniques and dishes to make.

Everything else in my life is complete shit. Alpha Graham allows pack members to hit me and verbally abuse me and they take full advantage at every opportunity. He comes to my room multiple times a week to beat me and berate me for imaginary offenses I haven’t committed.

Sometimes Ryan comes and watches. A couple of times he even gets the whip for his father but he never actually hits me. I swear I see him smiling while he watches. Lex tries to convince me to fight back, but that would be a death sentence for both of us. If I fight back or even worse, if I shift, I’m certain I’d be killed on the spot.

Lex keeps telling me everything will change when I shift. She keeps saying we are a daughter of the Moon Goddess and we are her warrior. She is frustrated that I submit instead of fighting back. She is angry at me for keeping her a secret. She says doing so is making her weaker.

“Okay, Lex, a couple of problems with all of this,” I try to tell her for the millionth time after we plop in bed, “First, I have no idea when I’m going to be able to let you out.

I’m up and working every day from five a.m. until after midnight. Secondly, if the Alpha finds out I have a wolf at all, he might banish me and kill me or just skip banishing me and straight out kill me. Lastly, we are a slave, not a warrior. We aren’t even an omega.”

“Kas, we are not just a warrior, we are a child of the Moon Goddess. She is our mother.”

I just roll my eyes, “Okay, okay. I don’t know when I can let you out, but at the first opportunity, I will take it, Lex. I promise.”

This seems to satisfy her. We keep having the same argument about werewolves all being children of Moon Goddess versus being an actual child of the Moon Goddess. She doesn’t understand the difference. I think

she actually believes the Moon Goddess is my mom, like, in the literal sense of the word mother.

Every night, I’m completely exhausted by the time I get back to my room. It’s an even longer day if I’m visited by Alpha Graham. Lex has been the best friend I could ask for, even if she is frustrated and getting weak. She is always supporting me and pushing me to not give up. I feel guilty that I can’t support her in return.

to me while I’m making lunch and tells me the

the door quietly in case

from inside. I pull open the

to get away from him is to

stand there,

door behind me. I stay as close to the door as

forming a pact with them. They must be treated with the utmost respect and courtesy. Bring lunches to the conference room every day and make a formal dinner every night next week, keep their pantries stocked, and stay the Hell out

up from under my hat,

eyes. Yes, even after almost two months, he still hasn’t noticed that I have

also hasn’t

“Yes, sir.”

him. Make sure there is enough food for the party. Give Sam the information for

“Yes, sir.”

We need to keep the Alpha happy. If not, I won’t hesitate to let him kill you. Do

“Y-yes, sir.”

sight,” he points to the

Sam. Sam is in charge of ordering supplies for the packhouse. He should be in his office right now. My mind is already churning through the special foods to make and the groceries I need for them. I also need extra supplies for the guest suite pantries. I wonder what kind

northern region with my pack, Silver Moon, being the second largest. Alpha Graham says Blood River is vicious and strict. Most of their pack has served in the military at one point or another. They employ dark magicians and witches to help them keep power over neighboring packs. I wonder if they are going to

kills pack members who fail training tests because he doesn’t want weak wolves in his pack. Definitely a guy I don’t

answer. I knock a little louder. What a jerk, he has to know I’m here. He knows my scent. Just tell me

this guy, Kas. He’s creepy. He stares at

a choice but to work with him, Lex. He’s the money

Fine, but let’s make

More impatiently this time. “What