Chapter 134

Zenovia

I was reeling from the information overload and I had lost count of how many times I was left speechless by Callahan’s words.

He kept looking at me, waiting for my reaction as I processed whatever he had revealed. My legs felt shaky and my knees wobbled, so I gripped the edge of the table for support.

Callahan had been in love with Aislynn…long ago. He was the

commander in chief of Selene’s forces and fell in love with the daughter of the enemy. So Selene cursed him to die a pained death, and live a loveless life…just because he fell in love with an enemy?

For a while we sat in an awkward silence, the only noises in his office being him drinking more whisky and me clicking a pen on and off to give my fingers something to do. My heart was thudding wildly and, despite all the other jarring things he had told me, just one of the many revelations cut through my heart like a sharp blade.

The fact that Callahan had been in love made a spark of white hot jealousy course through my spine, sending tingling sensations all over my body. I was not supposed to feel this way about a dead girl but I could not help it. My nails dug into my palms as I tried to maintain my composure.

Was he still in love with her? Is that why he would always say no to me? I remembered how girls would die to get just one look from him. Even at the ball, Cynthia and the others had tried hard to grab his attention. But he had only maintained a polite distance from them.

I had felt so nice to show Cynthia that she did not deserve Callahan because he preferred to make me his anchor. But…it had never been me.

His first choice, his first love, had been Aislynn. I recalled Aislynn’s beautiful face.

She truly used to look like a goddess herself, with her otherworldly appearance. My thoughts went haywire as I began comparing myself with her.

I had only seen her for a few minutes in the memory, but those minutes had been more than enough to tell me that she was a beauty. She had long hair and dressed like a princess. Her voice had been calming, too.

And I…I just scream and yell for the most basic things. I look ordinary as well.

never brought up by a witch queen or some noble to have the mannerisms of a sweet young lady.

to be shorter and his build leaner, giving him an athletic physique.

kissed him, looked at her as if she was the center of the

arms as she took her last breath, cradling her

my head. What was I

her die. And he lives with that memory that must

must have been so painful. The cogs in my brain were churning as I began to recall all of

nothing more but wishful thinking. That must also be the reason why Drusilla had to put in so much effort for him to agree to finding an anchor, nag him endlessly to give in

never openly loathed Selene, but only now I could recall how he would snort whenever we spoke about fate or the Moon Goddess. He had turned into an atheist and at that time,

after hearing the truth, I could not blame

sat on her throne comfortably while he risked his life every day, waging a war that was not his and lives with the burden of deaths of many warriors that

selfish of me to be jealous of Aislynn at this moment when he needs me to support him? How could

and grief, both of which did not belong to me. I could feel

and it suddenly became too much for me to bear. I felt as

I told him it was hurting me, he would shut himself off again. I could not risk that. I had to let

by bearing a huge chunk of the pain even though she

as tears stung the

sharing the load with me. Now that she had taken some of the pain off, my brain could

I could truly understand why he was so cold

into a cold and

if he had read my

with open arms. I never wanted a mate or anybody to love me. I knew

of the bottle and threw it away, the glass bottle thudding softly against the

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