Hot Revenge Box Set 4

Richard handles the veg knife like a kid with his first wax crayon, not so much peeling the potatoes as hacking chunks from the outside.

Trying not to be obvious about it, I watch the performance for a few seconds…

He’s going to slice his thumb if he keeps that up…

…. then taking a peeler from the cutlery drawer, I pluck the knife from his hand and replace it with the peeler. “Try that instead.”

He fumbles at the potato, drawing off a sliver of peel. “Ah, yes. That’s much easier.”

Still, I keep half an eye on what he’s doing. “Not that one,” I say, pointing to the potato in his hand. “It’s green.”

“Oh…” Richard stares at the tuber. “There were a few green ones at the top of the sack. Is something wrong with them?”

“You can poison yourself with green potatoes. That’s why you store them in the dark. So they don’t go green.”

“Seriously?” Richard stares at the spud in his hand as though he’s never seen one before. “Poisonous? Potatoes? But I eat them every day.”

“Yes, seriously. They’re from the same family of plants as Belladonna, the Solanaceae. The green parts contain a toxin called solanine.”

Richard regards the tuber in his hand with a sceptical eye.

“Belladonna? Pretty lady?”

“Medieval women used it cosmetically to enlarge their pupils. The alkaloids that achieve the effect are some of the more effective toxins out there.”

Still, he looks dubious.

potato plant when it’s in flower,” I say. “You’ll see the resemblance then. In any case, don’t add green potatoes

“How dangerous are they?”

a lot of green potatoes to do yourself any real damage. But…” I raise a finger. “Solanine

mouth drops open, then striding across the kitchen, he toes open

*****

Michael

sign of James, but Scruffy and Bear sit in one corner, snouts lifted, noses twitching in the direction of the

glopping and redissolving into the surface.

to open the wine? Set it to warm… I’ll serve the meal in the dining room, but we can sit in here while the food’s cooking.” He offers me the bottle, then hovers, sucking at his teeth. “That’s Rioja, to go with the casserole. But perhaps

idea. This is a celebration

“Course it is. Back in

to the hob. Bear isn’t so subtle. He simply stares at

seconds I reckon I have before James’ return, I fork a

toss half to each of the dogs. The two halves vanish mid-air with twinned Chops! leaving on

Why just them?

as I’m blowing on it, the door swings, James strolls in, a bottle of cava in each hand, and

Fuck!

blowing air over my scalded

puts the bottles into the fridge. Then, stacking plates and cutlery onto a tray, “Perhaps when you’ve finished donating our dinner to Scruffy and Dogzilla there, you would like to lay

a corkscrew from the drawer, I wrestle the cork out of the Rioja bottle... “Nice choice by the way.”

his pot, flapping a palm as his spectacles mist over. “Choice? Yes, I thought Georgie would appreciate a Spanish meal. We visited my boyhood home several times when she was small, but I’m not sure she’s been

course. But what I meant

swipes his lenses clear with a bit of kitchen roll. “What email? Damn!” and he makes a dash for the oven where smoke is