It wasn’t as bad as not remembering the first ten years of her life, so she always said, “If I can handle not knowing, I can handle anything.”

She thought back to when her mother started rambling about how some time away from ‘London’s cold’ would be great. Just the thought of it stirred up her anger at how foolish she was for the lack of concern. Clare presumed her mother was blowing off steam, or some psychological bullshit after whatever happened to her. Fearing it was rape Flare could only hope not, because she’d seen the after effect, especially on people like her mother, who liked control. A shudder went through her at the vision of her mother ending up like her friend Stacy’s.

What Clare couldn’t understand about the whole ordeal was what was so damn important that she had to drop school and leave straight away, two weeks before her interview with Oxford University. That was what stayed on her mind, unsolved as she finally drifted off.

***

Clare open her sleep filled eyes. Her stiff neck begging to be stretched as her lower back felt like it was run over by a train, leaving her groaning in discomfort. Lifting her head, a wave of lead greeted her before the constant pound of drumming made her want to drill a nail in her skull and dig her brain out. Talk about an alcohol free hangover.

Side effects of awkward sleeping, ‘shit,’ she swore inwardly. She scrunched her face and slowly straightened her long legs.

Five minutes into stretching her body on the sofa she felt great. Well not that great but totally what she needed.

“Honey,”

“Jesus, mom, just scare the sleep right outta

the quirk of her brow and the tilt of her lip. Comfortably leaning against the door jamb, she waited until Clare finally got up off the floor, no doubt frowning. Flagging a menu in her hand, Michelle shook her head on

her mother. The light powder blue eyes so different to Clare’s green emeralds,

forks on the top of her mother’s head could mean either two things- they were getting a visitor, or the visitor was her mother. Judging from the flushed freckles on Michelle’s cheeks and the slight frown to her brow, Clare figured neither. Her mother had already been the visitor. Which meant that she must’ve slept for hours, no wonder her body felt like hell all over.

Clare herself couldn’t even feign. It was somehow ingrained in her to wear boots and always choose practicality over fashion. Unfortunately there was no way of confirming how true that assessment of hers was,

European eight. That night which changed everything was the exception. The one and only time Clare

her presumptions true

they both shared, surprise, surprise. Those weren’t the deciding factors. No, that was left to the obligation that Michelle always saw her as. Clare wasn’t a child wanted in Michelle's mind, but one to protect. She doubted her mother would’ve kept her if it wasn’t for the blood ties, and that hurt. But Clare always told herself, “If I can handle not knowing, I can handle anything,” and that was exactly what she was doing, handling

me like that?” She didn’t answer her mother. Not that she didn’t want to, she didn’t know the answer, so she

him. The mystery sperm donor. She had no recollection of her father or even his

he even alive? Not knowing, never stopped her conjuring him up. A rugged brown hair man, with paler skin and a sharp jawline to match unnaturally dark green eyes. She could almost see him, the male

nature which she must've inherited also from her dad, Clare moved well. She was solid on her feet. So what if she couldn’t pull off the grace that Michelle possessed. She could tackle a ball

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