In My Desperate Time

I run to the bathroom and lock the door.

I lean against the door, and my heart feels like being pressed by a heavy stone, which makes me breathless.

I see things simply. I didn’t expect that things have just started and I have begun to think that it is not easy to stay at Frances Louis’s side.

I have prepared to throw my dignity away, but in the end, he tramples me to pieces.

Below me, there is a muddy liquid flowing out, with a silk of red.

Of course, I know. It's not my period. It's my transformation from girl to woman.

How ironic!

What's the point of this blood coming out now?

Can I bring Frances Louis in and show him?

“Jane Noyes, maybe your life is just a joke.”

I walk to the shower with a wry smile, open the shower head, carefully wash my soring body, and wash off the blood on the floor.

Let all these unimportant things go with the water. I just want to solve my brother problem through Frances Louis, and I don't want to think about anything else.

I don't know how long I've been in there. The foggy water fills in the bathroom, and I feel a little dizzy.

But I don't want to go out, I don't want to face Frances Louis' scrutiny.

At least, not tonight.

There is a rhythmic knock on the door, followed by the voice of Frances Louis.

“How long will you be in there? You wash yourself so long, Are you not clean, or I am not clean?”

I am shocked and don’t know what to do.

I am glad I have closed the door, or Frances Louis might have come in.

“Right…right away.”

a towel to wipe the body, but suddenly I slip down, and fall to the ground.

my head hits the floor so hard that I black out.

“Jane Noyes, Jane Noyes, what are you doing? Get out?!” The unhappy voice of Frances Louis

to come in and save me, but I don’t want him to see me naked. Although, he has seen everything.

is like knotted, I can say nothing

God, no! Can anything worse

Frances Louis calls me again outside door and knocks

the world becomes

gone, but the door is kicked open.

Frances Louis rushes

boiling hot. But I couldn't open my eyes. I have no idea

better not to see him, so as not

holds me up. I feel soft

while to feel less

Most importantly, I was conscious the whole

is terribly quiet. I don’t know whether Frances Louis is in

my eyes a little,

no expression on his face, but it is enough to embarrass me

am still naked. The air conditioning opens,

Is that how Frances Louis has been looking at me?

this, my face suddenly blushes. I pull over the quilt and

are you still up?” I turn my head away to skip the awkward subject.

doors and windows. If I had come in later, you would have been in heaven.”

Frances Louis glances at me and says

guess I

Damn it. I have not solved

phone rings, and he picks it up gently.

I know. Wait. I'll be right

is a woman on the other end of

that woman

ripples lightly. But I know it isn’t my business. Frances Louis and I just take what we need, and neither of us has any say in

come to him for Frank Noyes.

to Frances Louis about my brother, but he gets up and says, “you sleep first. I have to go out for a while.”

to talk to you.” I say quickly.