In My Desperate Time

Chapter 92 Suicide

Grandpa’s stare makes me uncomfortable.

I swallow nervously and reply honestly, “Yes, my name is Jane Noyes.”

Has his grandpa met me somewhere before? Or he might have sensed something. Why else would he look at me like that?

Then he goes out.

He sits on the sofa in the living room, still looking into the kitchen from time to time. I feel a little uncomfortable so I close the door.

I always sense something is wrong in the kitchen, but I am too hungry to think twice.

I want to eat dumplings, so I take the flour out of the fridge, and begin to prepare.

As I knead the dough for a while, I feel dizzy and out of breath.

“When Frances comes back, tell him I'm gone.”

Grandpa says outside the door.

“Okay.” I hold the wall and answer with difficulty.

The kitchen smells terrible.

What’s the smell?

try to keep myself awake. Suddenly I realize that grandpa was startled by me. He knocked over the pan, water spilled out and put out the fire,

why I feel so

and I plod

I lie on the ground and could not

like the air in my lungs is being squeezed away, and I feel very

I am still

feel, the more awake

seems that I am waiting for somebody. Deep in my thoughts, I believe that

of a gas leak, it is so

why I closed the

am going to die

Frances Louis’s

“Jane Noyes.”

want to answer but my lips

Louis calls my name several times, then everything

Does he leave?

I feel so helpless.

loud. I wonder if

door bursts open and Frances Louis rushes

keep my eyes open, but I could feel

my consciousness collapses and I pass

the hospital, muzzled with an oxygen mask and tethered to an IV. Frances Louis is sitting by the bed, looking at me with a

survival makes me want to

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