In My Desperate Time

After one week, I am discharged from the hospital.

During the hospital stay, I pick out a name for my daughter:

Penelope.

It means love that never dies.

But I guess I'm the only one who knows why I give her that name.

Penelope has yet to be discharged from the hospital, but now she can take her bottle herself. That's something!

The doctor gives her a checkup and tells me that if it goes well, Penelope will be transferred to the general ward in two days.

Since I can't see Penelope except in visiting hours, my mother and I go back to our hometown together.

On Monday afternoon, we rush over to see her.

Three days later, Penelope is transferred to the general ward. And I stay in the hospital so that I can take good care of her.

Seeing her increasingly round chubby cheeks, I feel extremely happy.

But my mother really worries about me.

"Jane, you've lost a lot of weight."

know I'm thinner than I

in a month. My mother wouldn't let me. If not for my tears and pleas, I wouldn't have been allowed

barely

in the mirror, I'm even afraid to look at myself. I'm afraid that it might make me feel painful

I fall apart,

Penelope's after I've taken care of her for a whole

has gained from 1.6 kilograms to

doctor in mind, I carefully

It requires a lot of money to raise a

have

all I can do

after giving birth to Penelope, I go to the job market for job

don't want to be

I pick up the brush, I

would suddenly come to my mind and

recurring flashbacks of the bygone days. That shot has brought me great pain, reminding me that it was me who personally destroyed

my heart

be away from Frances if I didn't

he suddenly shows

up with

like a family

moment, I'm carrying a lunch box, squatting on the side of the road and eating my lunch. I look like a real